Written by lainie at 03:07 PM on November 2, 2003 as a favorite post.

Some people are just super anal. There's no getting around it. Say, for example, someone my very good friend considers a fat cow seriously upsets her. Again. Now say, it's usually up to me to console said upset friend. How the @#%$ I'm supposed to do that when she's halfway around the world I have no frickin idea. I mean, there are only so many times I can begin an email with the words 'Oh babes, it'll be okay...chill' cause goddamit it is NOT gonna be okay I am going crazy trying to think of new words to use so it doesn't sound like I have the same email stored aside to send her everytime that fat cow moos.

However, I am a tech girl, and i figured, heck why not do something different? Let's surf to my friend's photo site, lift off fat cow's photo, and Photoshop a pig's snout on her, with the additional two pig ears? So I do. And i attach a little bit of spinach between her lips, cause between you and me, cows and pigs look better with a bit of green there.

Then, I write a satirical piece on said fat cow diving off a cliff to her death after some junk food cause she'd been put on some starvation diet for being too damned fat (like Gwen, in Enid Blyton's Malory Towers) and discoverin oil, to the joy of the suddenly much richer school she came from who owned the land.

Ahhhh that was fun to write. I gave it as a surprise cheer-up present for my friend, who did perk up after reading it (and seeing the picture). I left it on my site because, firstly, Hey, who deletes good memories right? And secondly, I wanted her to have a quick fixer-upper everytime my friend was feeling down thanks to the bullying there.

Of course, one of the consequences of being highly ranked on google is that suppose said fat cow typed her name into it, and because she has such a sad pathetic life that no one else wrote about her on the internet, my site would be the first to appear. With my arse luck, of course said mooing animal would not realise that satire is very common on the internet. The joke is she was looking for her page on sporting achievements (maybe the word achievement is pushing it. Attempt is more suitable), and *snicker* was not expecting my page.

I checked out the sports page, and oh Goodness...It was some super long page where her name appears once among almost 100 names (yeah, I counted cause I was feelin very incredulous) for the hammer throw (what, you thought I was kidding about the fat in fat cow?).

By now, said good friend all the way in London finds out that, shock, horrors, we'd been found out. Regardless of what she thinks of the fat cow, she doesn't like trouble so I take my page down (dammit) and wrote apologetic email to said cow (so not like me, but the things I'll do for my friends...sigh. I've clicked the send button, too late for regrets then).

What the hell do i get in return???

Fat cow's mom sends me an email to say unless my good friend practically grovels in front of her daughter (oh please, great goddess do let me kiss your fingers, your ass, your hooves, oh I am not worthy) she'll contact a solicitor and send an email to my web provider to close down my site. Why? Cause asides from hurting their feelings (which apparently only showed up after getting a taste of bullying themselves), someone might be deterred from looking up excellent daughter's sporting acheivements as they might think she really died jumping off a cliff after food when they read my page. Her mother said that, not me.

You know, not only does that put into perspective what her mother thinks about her own daughter and what people might actually believe about her (jumping off cliffs after food, growing snouts included), it also goes to show that grown-ups sometimes have no idea what they're talking about, cause if some talent scout finds and picks her through that list of a hundred names, I'll pull a rabbit and three cars outta my ass if I have to eat the rabbit and then stuff cars up my ass ala- Ryan Dunn, Jackass. [link]

Sigh. Someone should have told her considering the frequency of me pissing off the world, which is very very often, a lawsuit threat from far far away is really nothing compared to threats at home about hunting me down and beating the shite outta me or killing me. And that I'm possibly the most anal back-upper on mother Earth so go ahead, I'll just re-upload everything, and wait a few days for google to crawl through the net again. Big friggin deal.


But hey, if she wants to tell a lawyer that her daughter is so unpopular someone halfway round the world took the trouble to make a pig picture of her eating spinach, go ahead. From what I hear lawyers need a good laugh every now and then

About the only thing keeping me from sending her graphic instructions through email on how to remove that big prong up her arse is how my friend, who actually isn't much of a prude herself, would react *pulls back in shock horror*. Then again, I'm very annoyed by now, what the fuck more can they want?. One more email from them with that snippy sniffly tone, and I'll put up many, many sites everywhere (like geocities where you can never ever remove a site) with many many photos, I swear.

Ahh well such is life, and it's just another day of me, pissing the rest of the world off.

Written by lainie at 04:31 PM on November 2, 2003.

[This is my side of a phone conversation]:

Lainie: I'm not angry, who said I'm angry?

[Alanis Morissette music blaring in background]:

And every time you speak her name
Does she know how you told me you'd hold me
Until you died, till you died
But you're still alive

Lainie: That is so unfair! I am a happy, chirpy, person!


[Alanis Morissette continually not helping my case]:
Did you forget about me, Mister Duplicity?
I hate to bug you in the middle of dinner
It was a slap in the face how quickly I was replaced
Are you thinking of me when you fuck her

Lainie: *menacingly* I. am. HAPPY. Yes, I'm glad we agree.

[Alanis Morrisette's song comes to an end]

You, you you oughta know...


Well, just to mention, I'm happy, maybe a little bit annoyed lately but doing fine otherwise. I am not a grumpy beary old hag. I am, however, geeky *sigh, i knew it* as shown by this quiz [link]



You are a geek. Good for you! Considering the endless complexity of the universe, as well as whatever discipline you happen to be most interested in, you'll never be bored as long as you have a good book store, a net connection, and thousands of dollars worth of expensive equipment. Assuming you're a technical geek, you'll be able to afford it, too. If you're not a technical geek, you're geek enough to mate with a technical geek and thereby get the needed dough.
Dating tip: Don't date a geek of the same persuasion as you. You'll constantly try to out-geek the other.

The scary thing is how spot-on the analysis is (it can be argued that it is scarier that I actually tried out the test).

Written by lainie at 05:27 PM on November 5, 2003 as a favorite post.

I am the only person I know of who has ever mixed up the date for her final exams. Yeah. My macroeconomics was today, I thought it was tomorrow. I don't see any close friends feeling surprised.

My best friend just said 'Good luck! break an arm!' <-she really means leg, but anyway, the point is she wasn't even vaguely surprised. Strong, sturdy, reputation for being a hare brain, I suppose.

Along with the 'new' me, which includes this lovely side that studies for exams at least a few days beforehand, was a plan I had to do past year exam papers today so I'd know what the hell is happening, you know? What to expect?

Being the lucky, lucky (well, sorta) person that I am, I had this nagging feeling I should check up on the date of the exam instead. I rolled out of bed at 12, a good hour before my usual wake-up-for-lunch time, mucked around, and sent my housemate this sms at 12.30:

Elsa, be a darling and check my ecw1102 exam date...it's tomorrow but i have this weird paranoid feeling i should check it

Five minutes later a very incredulous Elsa calls to say

Elsa: Isn't today the 5th?
Lainie: Yeah....So what time is my exam tomorrow?
Elsa: It's at 1.30pm, on the 5th
Lainie: .......
Lainie: You just said the 5th, didn't you?
Elsa: Yeah.
Lainie: I'm screwed aren't I?
Elsa: Nothing new.
Lainie: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGHHHH SHITTTT!!!

Then ran like crazy gathering books, notes, pens, student ids. Why the hurry with an hour to go? I live two hours away from from my exam venue, that's why.

And because I'm so smart, the first cab I jump into is some psycho cabbie who wouldn't know what brakes are if you rammed them up his ass.
And because I'm sooooo intelligent brains are coming out of my nose, I don't tell him to go slower even though I get horrendous motion sickness even on swings (sadly, true story with eyewitnesses).
And of course I got carsick reading my notes in the Cab of Death.

With the added oooomph of my intelligence, ahhh I did not bring my hostel keys with me. Or money to pay cabbie. Or keys to get back into house later. Elsa, being my housemate took care of the first two, although that meant that I couldn't open my room door to repay her yet cause no hostel keys, remember?.

Later, I'll have to explain to my aunt how I managed to screw up the dates. She knows I usually wake up at 1 too. Sigh. This should be interesting, especially when I get to the part where I sat for my exam carsick, breaking out in cold sweat, drenched from rain, with a sprained back and ankle.

See? This is what happens when you watch Elvis Lives and Just Shoot Me twice in the same night.

Stupid, yeah, that's me. Rollin ball of brains I am. I think I just singlehandedly lowered the average of the national IQ.

Written by lainie at 05:24 PM on November 6, 2003.

You'd think that in the middle of the fasting month a girl will be safe sitting between two short, fat, malay ladies in the train.

Then one of them lets a loud, gassy, bubbly soundin, huge-ass garlic cloud of burp out.

I gave the other malay lady next to me a stare that said don't you even start

Written by lainie at 06:27 PM on November 6, 2003.

Hee Hee Hee

This is too funny

Written by lainie at 03:14 PM on November 7, 2003.

Welcome to Malaysia was the first line in my old school's choral speaking script. Corny, but hey, we won! Of course, after Ms Nair quit teaching, the team just went downhill from there. Asses.


Lesson 1

You have just landed in KL International Airport and the first thing you want to do is to call your Malaysian friend. If you're calling him at home or at the office, the first thing to say on the phone is "Eh, what you doing?". If you're calling him on the handphone (cellular phone) the standard greeting is "Eh, where are you?"

Lesson 2

Your Malaysian friend has graciously offered to pick you from the airport. He said "Give me half an hour...", be prepared to wait at least one and a half hours. This is probably your first encounter with Malaysian Timing.

There's no need to adjust your watch. Whatever time a Malaysian tells you, just add another hour, and you won't go
wrong.

Lesson 3

You have no friends in Malaysia (yet) and you decide to take a cab
from the airport. You'll soon realize that the one-way taxi fare is more expensive than a night's stay at most decent hotels.

Lesson 4

If your friendly limo or taxi driver, says "Sir, you want to try some Thai chicken?", he's definitely not suggesting a good place for
Thai food.

If you encounter the word "chicken" in a taxi,
hotel lobby or street corner it usually means a lady who charges you
a fee in exchange for pleasure.

Lesson 5

If you're a newbie expat, your colleagues will definitely introduce
you to the mini Beverly Hills of Kuala Lumpur, Bangsar. Believe me, there are other more interesting places to shop, eat
and drink.

And by the way, get the pronunciation right! It's "Bar-
ngsar" not "Bang-sar" as in "Bangkok".

Lesson 6

Since you're heading for Bangsar anyway, you ought to know that
Bangsar was previously Indian territory before the white men's invasion.

Some of the local Indians you meet there try their very best to look
and behave like the blacks in the US. Complete with rapper's hair cut, shades and customary "Yo! What's up motherxxxx?" greeting, u would probably think that you're right in the middle of Harlem. But
remember this important warning:

Don't ever call them blacks, even though their sole purpose in life is to look and sound like the blacks. They become
extremely hostile if you refer to them as blacks! I can never figure this out but don't say I didn't warn you.

Lesson 7

Why do Malaysians call all Caucasians "Mat Sallehs"? About a hundred years ago, drunkard sailors from the West were a common sight in the Port Klang area. The locals used to call them "Mad "Sailors".

Somehow, it got corrupted into the Malay name "Mat Salleh". The Chinese will still call you "Gwai-Loh" or "Devil". To the more polite Hokkiens you're a "Ang Moh" or "Red Hair".

Lesson 8

If your Chinese friends invite you to join them for a Chinese meal like "Hokkien Mee" or "Bak Kut Teh", eat as much as you can. You're never gonna get it anywhere else. Not even in China, Taiwan or Hong Kong.

There's another Malaysian invention, the "Yee Sang" or raw fish salad (served during the Chinese New Year). Before I forget, if you're the queasy type, avoid ordering "spare-parts" when you're
having "Bak Kut Teh", unless you fancy all the internal parts of a pig.

Lesson 9

When you're in a restaurant, always "pop" the disposable tissue packet as loud as you can. Don't worry, nobody will get annoyed. Usually, at the end of a ten course dinner, there'll be one "Big Bang" as everybody "pops" theirs. In order to express your appreciation to your generous host, remember to throw in a loud belch as well.
Although it may be normal in your own country, don't ask the waiter for a separate bill (check). Either you pay for everything or just keep your mouth (and wallet) shut.

If you feel bad about it, offer to pay the next time. Anyway, don't worry too much about it as most locals know that most Mat
Sallehs are "stingy buggers"...

Lesson 10

Don't like to be a stingy Mat? Take your friends to a Mamak "fish-head curry" restaurant. Order the prawns and the crabs as
well.

Be totally reckless, don't ask about the prices and don't check your bill as well. I guarantee you'll find a big hole. The one in your pocket, not the ones you're always chasing in Bangsar. Whether you're in a five-star hotel or at a roadside stall, always ask for the "bill". Nobody will understand when you say "check" or "tab".

Need a paper napkin or serviette? Just say "tishoo".

Lesson 11

Every Wednesday or Thursday night is Ladies' Night at the "fun pubs" and discos. That's the night when most club operators get rid of all their stale and unwanted alcohol. They mix it into some strange cocktails and give it away free to the ladies. Ladies' Night is actually Men's Night!

That's the time when all the predatory "buayas" (crocodiles) go out in full force. Stick to normal nights, you'll find less competition. If you're a lady, stay away from the "buayas" and the free drinks (unless it's pouring brands).

Lesson 12

Stop hassling the street vendor who sold you a 3 VCD set of "The
Titanic" that didn't exactly meet the ISO 9000 specifications. C'mon, what can you buy for US $3 back home?

Besides, you should listen to your own government and not buy pirated stuff. But from what I see at Imbi Plaza, pewter and batik are no longer the favorite souvenirs.

By the way, when you're at Imbi Plaza, don't forget to check out
another distinguished landmark of Malaysia; the world's first and only permanently static escalator.

Lesson 13

Malaysian drivers tend to slow down when they come across any road accidents. They are not being cautious nor do they intend to give assistance. They must catch a glimpse of that ever important "Nombor".

Even if the number (license) plate is broken into a million pieces, the
passerbys will patiently re-assemble it just to obtain that "lucky"
number. Then, it's off to the 4D betting shops.

If the numbers doesn't come this way, they do some quick interpretation of their dreams through the handy Chinese
Dream Book. It looks like a Clip Art Visual Catalog. Nightmares are
included as well....

Damn, I'm Proud to be Malaysian!

Written by lainie at 04:03 PM on November 7, 2003 as a favorite post.

Oh the tattoo artists in Times Square are gonna kill me soon....

I went to the tattoo shop to get another design for i don't know, my ass maybe (heeee), and I was supposed to be back there to take a look at the design two weeks ago....Ho hum, Malaysian timing to the extreme, I suppose. They did call a few times (while I was sittin for my exams - nice timing huh?).

I can't help it, sprained my ankle, sprained my back trying not to aggravate my ankle, pulled a muscle trying not to make back worse, walked like an idiot and sprained my ankle again after it got better because my eyes are really too blind....Definitely not in the condition to walk to a mall only 5 minutes from where I live...Although I limped longer than that to get to this cyber cafe...Sigh. Such an Internet addict.

Yeah it's a good thing I live near, what, 3 hospitals? Can't be a coincidence.

My sister is coming down to KL on Sunday, and my aunt has plans for her. We're gonna tell her we're having small portions of vegetarian fried rice for dinner.
Heh. She's a right big appetite - carnivore, Gazel is...and she hates fried rice too....My aunt's mean....We're having fun from the idea anyway...I'd bet she'd ask for a fried egg, chicken, fried anything-protein to be added....My aunt's betting she'll just walk out and get some food...We're a right loving family, we are.

I am the only person I know who tells her mother 'I'm coming back home', cause I want to use the Cd burner and internet (of course I didn't tell her that) only to have her mom retort 'Don't you dare'.

Kind motherly love perhaps? Worried I might get into a road accident? More like she doesn't want to fight with anyone for her TV remote (all those chinese dramas she watches, it's awful!), doesn't want anyone hogging the computer when she wants to play those word games, doesn't want the house to turn into a music-blasting junkyard overnight.

Anyways, the tattoo I wanna get is pretty cool...It's a sunflower with a yin-yang sign in the middle, and the spots for the yin yang are eyes for tribal lizards....I just don't know where else I'm gonna hide a tattoo on my body God knows I'm in enough trouble trying to find a damned formal dress for Julian's wedding that doesn't show my tattoo....Ass has to get married before my education's all paid for...
My mom probably thinks I'm a super-prude....Yin yang I suppose...Family thinks I'm a prude, friends think I'm nuts.

I can remember this phone conversation with Dad when I wanted money for second tattoo and a trip to Penang with my girlfriends:

Lainie: Dad, can I have a tattoo?
(Usually calm) Dad: NOOOOO!!! That is the last thing on earth to get!! It's permanent and you are NOT to get one!

[looks down at her dragon tattoo...thinks eeeeps]

Lainie: It's not really thaaaaat permanent...You can get it lasered off yknow...

Dad: Kim (that's my name), No! (he's probably hearing alarm bells ringing at this point) You'll thank me for this next time when you understand.

Lainie: Okay then can I have some money to go to Penang instead?

At this point my two friends stifle laughters, jump up and shake my hand. We made plans to go to Penang to visit the guys (yeay) and then I looked down at the tattoo I got when I was supposed to be in my first-ever lecture of the semester.

Ahh well..maybe if I get something like 'I love daddy' or something added to my tattoo. I mean, he's only ever raised his voice at me twice before this, jeez...remind me to be five timezones away when he finds out.

Parents are weird....I've been pierced like what? Almost 20 times? Enough to freak out my classmates in Taylor's anyway.....Hmm...actually...I don't think they know about the extent of my piercings....That might explain it a bit actually....The worst was probably the piercing I got in Parade while I was skiving class....Dammit it got infected smack during SPM (that's the secondary school finals...major paper)...Was a right bitch sitting down for ages.

After that around 10 of my friends got a piercing from the shop there too, and none of us made it, so we know it was the shop and not us. My bio teacher was probably suspicious as hell...Yesterday, half the class was missing, today they're back and looking uncomfortable...Yeah you try and jump over a seven foot wall in a baju kurung (stupid looking school uniform with long skirt) at that time.

Speaking of schools, I just found out another one of my ex-classmates is gay. In Ipoh, probably Main Convent has the most notorious and scariest lesbians (especially the malay ones), although we didn't have the most. That's Ave Maria's job (hehe...and Ipoh mali people know that's true too- from my year anyway).

My mother went for lunch with a whole bunch of women from her Ladies club, and none of them could tell that the manager serving them the entire time is a woman. We went back for lunch again and she still couldn't tell. Gazel and I pointed out the wide hips, feminine face yada yada, and she still wouldn't buy it (Mom's eyesight not what it was maybe). I asked her how she could send Gazel (Ave Maria girl) and me (kicked-out-of Ave Maria girl, now ex-Main Convent girl) to the biggest lesbian schools available in the state, then *not* believe us.

Rano, my friend from...Oh whatsit...some school MGS I think, was shocked to find out what used to go on in my school...I thought everything that went on was normal, till I found out how boring her school was. Ahh well......it's okay, we fixed that when she came to KL and lived with a big bunch of MC girls. Rano, dear, opened up your eyes didn't we? :D

Hmm...I guess if I'm gonna talk to you I might as well give you this address...makes more sense that way This is why I didn't like marketing subjects in Uni.

Oh and Rano, since you know me so well, try and guess why I'm typing so much here when I should be studying for my exams?


Procrastination...yeah...smart girl
.

Written by lainie at 04:50 PM on November 7, 2003.

Check out what Gazel sent me ( I think it looks a bit fake, as in photo composition, not the boobs)

Written by lainie at 02:38 PM on November 8, 2003.

I'm going crazy living with 3 constantly horny dogs humping each other all the time. Two male dogs, one bitch on heat, practically a summer movie in the making.

Well, I don't mind the constant humping really, sorta reminds me dearly of my friends *smiles sweetly, waves hand -hi there!*, it's just that I'm allergic to the dogs.

I can't even see anymore my eyes are watering so much. Anyways, Mahathir has finally stepped down as Prime Minister of Malaysia for longer than I can remember (proabably cause he's been PM since before I was born, yeah that would explain it).

Whoop-de-doo, another new PM to promote racial harmony (maybe), equality (if you're stupid enough to believe that) and fairness (to whoever can bribe the most). I do love this country, there are just some annoying kinks that needs to be worked out. I don't see it happening without some major bloodshed, optimist that I am.

Ah well, what the hell would I know. I don't know what I'm doing online when I should be studying...Oh right, downloading past year exam papers....Because the way my lovely university works, I can download past exam papers for a subject I'm resitting, but not the notes. Umm hello you think someone who failed this subject would have her notes? Apparently so, dammit.

I would like to make an announcement:
Self-proclaimed Harry Potter fan, Rano, has not read Order of the Phoenix

Hehehe...Yeah Rano, now do you feel like concentrating on your exams and assignments?

Written by lainie at 03:06 PM on November 8, 2003.

A cabbie just told me that school holidays are here. Weird, some cabbies around PJ and KL actually recognise me...I travel too much around here

Aaaah let's see if my predictions of what goes on in Form5 before they leave school is correct.

1: There will be autograph books handed around

2: Email addresses of people you won't give a dick about in 2 days will be written down.

3: Those with handphones are busy keying in other cell phone numbers (Hey, I'm 20, not everyone in school a few years ago had one, alright?), and house numbers that won't be any use in a month or so when these people get a cell phone number.

4: There will be cameras everywhere

5: Takin pictures of people smiling and hugging each other (Pardon me, I'm from an all-girls school so no one is covered in flour in these photos), and they will look exactly like all the other Leaving-school photos. At least one person will have the V fingers up.

6: Keep in touch! and Friends Forever /4eva! will be the 5 most annoying words in your life for the next few days

7: Your school book shop will stock up on glitter, multi-coloured pens (Girls's school, girl's school)

8: Some idiots will find some way of leaving a permanent mark behind in school by scratching the walls or somethng.

9: School as you know it will be divided into 4 sections: Those going to F6, those going to the same college as you, those who aren't and those you couldn't care less about.

10: Most going away to further studies are drooling at the idea of shopping and partying far away from parents.

11: There will be a class photo, where someone is always absent on that day, and you can't tell who's who cause the faces are so tiny. Your class teacher will be in the middle of the photo, smiling stiffly.

12: You'll never, ever, realise how much you miss school till you leave.


.

Written by lainie at 03:36 PM on November 8, 2003.

Linkies time:

You can have loads of fun with this church sign generator:
http://www.aboyandhiscomputer.com/churchsigngenerator/index.php

Or you can see some really, really funny examples here:
http://asmallvictory.net/archives/005145.html#005145
http://www.shortstrangetrip.org/archives/000916.html


I love the internet hehehe....And it's not that I'm out to insult churches, I know too many church goers to pull anything that stupid, but sometimes their pun billboards are asking for it

Written by lainie at 04:06 PM on November 8, 2003.

My friends are nuts:

Rach: If I was a girl, I'd have legs like that
Lainie: Rachel....You are a girl.

[the next day]

Rach: If I was a girl, I'd have an ass like that
Lainie: Umm...Rach?

[months later]

Rach: I have four balls

(she's referring to body parts, not toys)


.

Written by lainie at 05:24 PM on November 8, 2003.

Aiyooo...I.Should.Be.Studying.

I'm always on the net the most when I have exams coming up. That settles it then, I ain't telling my sister about this site

I've read Harry Potter 3 times in 2 weeks, and if this isn't procrastination right in the face of my exams (or rather, denial) I don't know what it is.

I feel like I'm already on holiday....Of course if I go back to Ipoh, I'll have no where to go cept for Parade or Jusco, and that is just so so sad.

I'm making a list of people who will be around during my hols, and I came up with 2 names. How depressing!

Oh well at least my life isn't so uneventful (read: boring), I have plans for the end of this month, I'm going to church camp! If I had any feelings left, I'd go cry now

Ahh well...at least I'll be going to Times Square some time next week to check out the design of the tattoo I want (and with my more-unrealistic-than-reality excuse for not coming earlier, as I mentioned yesterday)

This song is so stuck in my head:

We try to take it slow
But we're still losin control
And we try to make it work
But it still ends up the worst
And I'm craaazzzy
tryin to be your lady
I think I'm goin crazy


.

Written by lainie at 07:23 PM on November 8, 2003.

Some excerpts from Malaysiakini.com:

Allegations of terrorist attacks in Malaysia:

State Department said Osama bin Laden's al-Qaeda network could have been planning new attacks on US citizens and interests in Malaysia.

A typically sardonic Mahathir responded to that warning by saying : "I'd like to remind them that the attack on the World Trade Centre was on American soil, not here. So America is much more dangerous than Malaysia."

And then about Mahathir pissing off too many people about the Jew thing when he said:

"The Europeans killed six million Jews out of 12 million. But today the Jews rule this world by proxy. They get others to fight and die for them."

The State Department said the Bush administration believed Mahathir had already been adequately rebuked for his remarks and that his successor deserved a chance "to take a different stance" before being punished financially.

Now Little Archie, if you admit that Little Jughead was wrong, and that you'll agree with me, I won't punish you.

and then, here comes the cane:

US Senate on Monday voted to cut RM4.6 million in military aid

and Mahathir (I love his sarcasm, it's fun)

Mahathir, whose government has ordered billions of dollars worth of new military equipment in the past two years, brushed that threat aside yesterday, saying: "It doesn't make any difference to us. We don't really need that money."

Sigh. I feel embarrassed for US


.

Written by lainie at 02:12 AM on November 9, 2003.

Well, I took a house sorting test:



Get sorted by the Sorting Hat!

I don't always end up in Gryffindor when I take these tests, usually Slytherin or Ravenclaw

My favourite house is Ravenclaw, followed by Slytherin then Gryffindor. I hate the whole concept behind Hufflepuff, but I guess you have to stick the rest of the losers somewhere.


.

Written by lainie at 03:51 AM on November 9, 2003.

My current favourite memory is of what a darling once said about the (non) intelligence of this girl I didn't like:

The only time she starts a sentence with the words I feel, is when she's saying something like: I feel this pink top looks better than that blue one'

My dear, I can never thank you enough for those words. Just remembering them makes my day and now I feel like shovelling some sunshine up the world's collective ass

.

Written by lainie at 03:11 PM on November 9, 2003.

Heh, something I'll need in the future, no doubt:

Buy Your Way Into Heaven
I seem to be gettin a lot of heaven jokes coming my way

And something for the guys out there who need a lil excitement in their lives:
Jail Babe 4 Free
Nothing like dating a convicted homocidal jailbird to get the ol' blood rushin again

Oh and with a name like Geekward, Ho!, what's not to love? Check out her blog, funny stuff there!

I'm stuck at home (I figured out a way to fix my uncle's computer) waiting for my sister to arrive, plus I don't have the house keys (yeah they have soooooo much faith in me staying home to study.


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Written by lainie at 11:32 PM on November 9, 2003.

EEEYARGGGHHHHH HOW THE FUCK DO THE BLOODY SHITHEADS IN YAHOO EXPECT ME TO CONFIRM MY COUNTRY TO RETRIEVE MY DAMNED FUCKING ASSHOLE PASSWORD IF THEY DIDN'T FUCKING ASK FOR IT IN THE FIRST PLACE

FUCKING ASSHOLES IDIOTS!!! FUCKAU FUCKHEAD FUCKAUS!!!


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Written by lainie at 12:48 AM on November 10, 2003.

LAYER ONE:


-- Name: Lainie. (My.name.is.Lainie.Not.Elaine.


-- Birth date: 8th May


-- Birthplace: - Ipoh - hee...was the longest baby in hospital history at that time


-- Eye Color: Dark


-- Hair Color: Dark


-- Height: 5’5” or so


-- Righty or Lefty: Righty....Can do a lot with my left though


-- Zodiac Sign: Taurus


LAYER TWO:

-- The shoes you wore today: Kickbacks


-- Your weakness: I can never control myself I seldom do what I should, only what I want.


-- Your fears: I'm scared of cockroaches. Very. And I spook easy too


-- Your perfect pizza: I like thin pizzas, with chilli flakes and spices on it...Not so much a cheese and tomato pizza person (how's this relevant?)

-- Coffee or tea?: Coffee. No contest.

-- Goal you'd like to achieve: Reach my holidays in one piece, not scare off my new housemates too soon


LAYER THREE:


-- Your most overused phrase on ICQ: hahaha :D


-- Your thoughts first waking up: Coffee...where? Five more minutes...


-- Your bedtime: Wee hours of the morning....Maybe 2 to 3am


-- Your most missed memory: Happy days back then, I suppose.....as they say, you don't know when you're happy, you remember it.


--Your worst memory: Convenient memory, can't remember things I don't like.


LAYER FOUR:


-- In love: Nah. Mildly interested, maybe.


-- Have a weird fetish: Oh sure, let me post it up here so all my friends, family and weird stalkers can see.


--Ideal guy/girl: Sigh...I'm not gonna bother. I list a lot of things, then end up liking people with more qualifications in the 'no way' list than the 'rock on' one.



LAYER FIVE:


-- Smoke: the amount of second hand smoke I inhale....sigh..


-- Cuss: I'm great at blaspheming...Prita taught me the Fuck language


-- Sing: Awfully....No one in my family can sing, on either side. Those that say they can are either lying, or hallucinating.


-- Take a shower everyday: Eww...Obviously....wonder what made -whoever- come up with this question???


-- Have a crush: Crush? Nooo....unless you count musicians *Ryan Adams* but I guess that normally doesn't count


-- Do you think you've been in love: I think I was great at hallucinating, is what I did.


-- Go to college: taylors sam bioscience grad....the course was boring, the stuff we were doing when we were supposed to be in class was loads of fun though.


-- Like(d) high school: A lot of good times there, good people too


-- Want to get married: Nothing to make my hair stand up than the words marries, commitment and long-term hahaha....Then again, I have some friends who leave cloud dusts behind from running away when they hear these words.

--Like kids: No. Well....cept for those I'm related to, or those my friends are related to, cause I have to get used to them right? I generally get along with people younger than me though....Rish, rano, rach, deb....hmmm...


-- Believe in yourself: I'd jolly well better, I'd hate to give myself a complex over something so simple


-- Get motion sickness: I can get sick even on swings, as one of my ex-housemates can testify. I love roller coasters though..


-- Think you're a health freak: Hahahhaha.....hahahhaha.....hahhaa... I'm not delusional, I can't even think of a person who would lie like that on my behalf.


-- Get along with your parent(s): Ahem.


-- Like thunderstorms: I love them...I take a chair out to my balcony (I'm on the 22nd floor) and sit there till it ends. Yeah it's super boring where I live, so I have plenty of time to spare.


-- Play an instrument: I can sort of honky tonk a guitar haha....enough to make my tutor want to kill himself


-- Special abilities: Like levitation?? Umm...I'm pretty sure I'll make an excellent stalker, why?


LAYER SIX:


In the past month...


-- Drank alcohol: I'm a uni student in KL, what do you think?


-- Smoked: nope, 0


-- Done a drug: hahaha nope...medicines only


-- Done something illegal: only mild stuff......


-- Gone to the mall?: Times Square....


-- Eaten an entire box of Oreos: Yuck...that is so gross


-- Eaten sushi: Went for japanese buffet, but nope..I prefer sashimi


-- Been on stage: not this month


-- Been dumped: that would be interesting, seeing as to how I'm single


-- Gone skating: Nope, used to inline loads though....Sigh...this coming from someone who twisted her ankle twice in one week.


-- Made homemade cookies: No....I have friends very interested in special types of baking though


-- Gone skinny dipping: hmm..the only pool I can think of is the public one constantly surrounded by guys where I stay....now there's an idea haha.....this question reminds me of rachel's pool party though...skinny dippers are a lot more unsightly that you'd think (bernie, if you're reading this, don't worry you'd look great even in a giant rabbit suit)


-- Dyed your hair: Planning to...Blue...or purple or whatever....I'm on holiday anyway...although hmm...Julian's wedding is coming up....


-- Got a tattoo: Shite...this is psychic...planning to...going to check out tattoo design first later in the week


--Said goodbye: Oh damn...I'm so bad with dates...say bye to Rach rano shu and some others...Can't remember when they left?


-- Fought with someone: No....wow...I've been pretty peaceful lately huh? I argued with Risha.....same as always, I say perang is brown, she says it's grey, rach takes my side, says it's light brown, rano tells rish it's definitely not brown, then we end up feeling pathetic about this quarrelling topic. I don't know how to pronounce perang (i think I'm saying war) so Rish says I definitely can't be right.


-- You sound boring: Ahh well, net addicts tend to be. wait till i tell you about the wonderful plans my mother has about me painting clogs pink for a charity during my holidays (sadly, i'm not lying). Oooooh, or my church camp! oh yeah, I'm like the Daily News.




LAYER SEVEN:


Ever...


-- Played a game that required removal of clothing: Yeah...


-- If so, was it mixed company: - yeah....nothing happened though (to me anyway, I'm too good at cards)


-- Been trashed or extremely intoxicated: Oh yes....Oh, I like :D Kinda sucks when I go back to a club almost a year later to still be remembered as the overly-drunk girl though.


-- Been caught "doing something": Umm....yeah...Hey Rano remember Shu? And my roommate Lena? Sigh...That was bad.


-- Been called a tease: not that I remember, so I don' think so... Tease as in cock-tease or friend-tease?


-- Got beaten up: no dear, I beat people, I don't get beaten up.

-- Shock with what you say: All the time...I'm very lippy...I think most recent that I can remember was when Rach took the liberty of telling her cousin that I said if I suck anymore, I'd be giving free blowjobs all around....I was in Breakers, this snooker/pool place then. He looked shocked.


-- Shoplifted: Nope. Never even crossed my mind before...



LAYER EIGHT:


-- Age you hope to be married: How about they lived happily ever after, and did not go through that whole marriage shite where the young women going will curse cause they have to find, and wear, a dress (dammit) that covers all body art that ain't supposed to be there?


-- Numbers and Names of Children: Sigh..I don't like kids much...But hey, here goes: Calyb, Bodhis, Aidan. Jennifer, Natalie, Rachel (I told rach i'd name one after her although goddamn if I'm gonna be like some egg laying bird cranking out kids everywhere)........hmm...this is probably why my friends tell me not to have kids I have plans for them. My sadistic fun, their torture. Ah well.


-- Describe your Dream Wedding: This is a very presumptious quiz isn't it? Some night barbeque at the beach where everyone can get drunk and high, topless waiter hunks so my single friends can hook up, no kids, casual, whatever.


-- How do you want to die: You know how in those lawyer shows people keep dropping over like dead flies from boinking at old age? Yeah if I have kids, I want my grandkids to be able to say 'me gran tried to do it with this 20 year old guy, and died from exhaustion'.


-- Where do you want to go to college: Been there, done that.


-- What do you want to be when you grow up: Happy.


-- What country would you most like to visit: Goa? Rish has been convincing me it's a fantastic place


LAYER NINE:


In a guy:


-- Best eye color? Geez....who cares? Something dark I guess


-- Best hair color? Guys who look good bald But dark colours, I suppose.


-- Short or long hair: either, I don't care, as long as the long hair doesn't look like some dead rat someone stuck on their head.


-- Height: taller than me...so traditionalist of me huh?


-- Best weight: ? Don't like skinny guys


-- Best articles of clothing: Anything goes, as long as they don't look like a bum


-- Best first date location: Cafe, movie....Whatever



LAYER TEN:


-- # of drugs taken illegally: umm.....lalalalalaaa...what'd you say?


-- # of people I could trust with my life: hmm...*counting* 1...4...7....13...I'm not gonna live very long, am I?


-- # of CDs that I own: Loads


-- # of tattoos (and what is it?): a dragon on my ankle, in fire colours.


-- # of scars on my body: A lot.....I heal well though, it's just that I got injured a lot too...


-- # of birthmarks: 2

--# of deep dark secrets: what, for real? 22? haha...it's not like no one knows about them anyway.

Written by lainie at 01:17 AM on November 10, 2003.

I love B&P lalala...Mike Ingram's the guy I'm getting em from, this is some linky love I'm sending out:

http://db.etree.org/nakedguydmb

I'm getting Howie Day, Mike Ingram, and maybe radiohead, coldplay, teitur or matt nathanson....i can't decide!! yaaaagh

Oh.my.god....he has ryan adams! and norah jones...hmm...ryan adams...i want want want

My mood is getting better and better :D

Written by lainie at 01:55 AM on November 10, 2003.

So I'm on Friendster right now, doing my thing, adding people sending messages, laughing at stuff on the bulletin board

Then I decide to check out the photos posted up by some people:

Shit no way....You don't look that good...You's airbrushing pimples off your photo or what?

HAH!! Bad haircut!

Oooh...so that's what his girlfriend looks like

Omigod...So skinny already...Airbrushed off some inches or what?

Wow...haven't seen her in years. She looks the same. Boring!

Woman who you kidding if that's your face my ass is pizza. Kiss it.


It's a good thing I don't believe in karma (today anyway), I have an exam coming up
Anyways, now that you know what a supreme ass I am (as if you couldn't tell from my website), if you still wanna add me I'm listed under the name Lainie Yeoh.

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Written by lainie at 02:11 AM on November 10, 2003.

Guess who's been checking her exam schedule so anally she's already logged on to the uni server 4 times today?

I do not need the panic of finding out I have an exam in one hour when I'm two hours away from my uni again

Those of you who know, yes I've been sufficiently freaked out, those of you who don't, click on the favourites link on the right (or just have the honour of reading what I write) to find out exactly how very, very stupid I am. It's like my brains are located right above my thighs, dig?

I should ask myself if I wanna put this up where Lyne can see...hmm..bit dangerous, that.

If you're in my xanga site (what the hell?) then you should follow the link on the left and check it out in tabulas if u want to.


Maybe I should call Rish and make sure it is the 10th today.

Wait, what am I saying?? My damn journal plasters some huge ass date all over my entries....Sigh...Mosquitoes are draining all the blood from my brains...I'm not usually this dumb, honest.

Maybe I should deflate my ego /boobs (not that the 2 are connected), let some blood flow back to my head.


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Written by lainie at 03:47 PM on November 10, 2003.

I've separated the 3 dogs. Bobby is locked in the kitchen, Belle in the living room with me and Buster outside.

Belle won't let Buster hump her which makes him all barky-whiney and noisy shite like that, then he tries to bully Bobby, who's a titchy sized dog.
Buster is a Retriever, he can knock over my 6 feet tall uncle in one jump.

So now, they're separated till Buster's balls deflate a little bit. Sigh....My life is super-sad isn't it? The most interesting thing that happened to me today is I had to solve the problem of an overly-horny dog. At least did it before I lost my temper, then I would have solved it with a few choice slashes of a kitchen knife.
'There Buster, it's causing so many problems, we'll just get rid of the root of evil here *slash slash*, and you can be a bitch too'

I just got an sms from Else teasing me cause her finals are over, while I still have 2 more papers.


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Written by lainie at 04:05 PM on November 10, 2003.

Je ne veux pas travailler
Je ne veux pas déjeuner
Je veux seulement t'oublier
Et puis je fume.

Well...I was a bit down till:

Words cannot describe the happiness I feel when I read this page called The Despicable Art of Flaming: You are an asshole, Shut the fuck up

I'm great at mood swings, I am.
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Written by lainie at 04:39 PM on November 10, 2003.

Some of the girls I used to stay with in Subang SS15, near Taylors

Written by lainie at 10:58 AM on November 11, 2003.

I owe Dieb many, many thanks for the great laughs I got through this link she posted: HARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!

Oh my stars and garters I am cackling like a hyena in a very crowded computer lab...This is fantastic, I thought I'd be in a shite mood after walking out 2 hours early from my bloody stats exam, but heyyyyy, now I have a fat dopey grin plastered on my face!

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Written by lainie at 11:11 AM on November 11, 2003.

I took this online test for a Salinger character...and ummm...I must have fucked up somewhere haha....I think it's cause I'm in such an excellent mood from the HARRR link in the post below


CONGRATULATIONS!~! You are Seymour! You are the
most beautiful person who has ever lived. You
are a true genius, but you don't think so
because you are humble. You are a poet, but
not literally. Really you are just a hopeless
philosopher, but your veins pump pure poetry.
You see beauty in unconventional places. You
are the type of person, sitting in the back of
the room listening to everyone else talk with a
broad smile on your face. However, you have
the same problem that faces all of the greatest
geniuses. You are too perfect, too special,
too beautiful for this world. This, drives you
insane and eventually you kill yourself. It's
no ones fault, you were just too perfect to
live in a world of imperfection.

"O snail
Climb Mount Fuji
But slowly, slowly!"


Who are you in Salingers Glass Family?


The second one...well..I can deal with infamy


You are Caught a Light Sneeze! You're dreamy,
different, and imaginative. People can have a
hard time following your train of thought but
it doesn't seem to bug you. You're the kind of
person who's gonna be famous, if not infamous,
for an idea.


*~What Tori Amos music video are you?~*



This reminds me of Roddy Hart's Lady...Just cause he mentions Salinger there!

.

Written by lainie at 04:05 PM on November 11, 2003.

This is a phone conversation I just had:

Risha: Hey Lainie, what's that thing that Carrie does in Sex and The City? I keep thinking South American, South American....
Lainie: A Brazilian wax?

[We watched that episode of Sex and The City together almost 2 years ago....she just expects me to remember....stuff]

Ahhh well...it's kinda fun imagining her asking for a South American wax. Ought to be interesting to find out where they'll go *wink*

This is like how she goes, 'remember that guy? that guy? the one I said is cute?'.
People, you don't understand! She's talking about one guy from five years ago she met during one wedding and never, ever, saw again, till now that is.

I have less hair on my head than the guys she thinks are cute.

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Written by lainie at 05:15 PM on November 11, 2003.

Heya, some songs I'm listening to right now:

Roddy Hart - Lady
The Thrills - Big Sur
Black Eyed Peas - Shut Up
Radiohead - Fake Plastic Trees
PJ Harvey - There Will Never Be A Better Time
The Darkness - I Believe In A Thing Called Love

Does anyone have any songs to recommend? I'm up for anything at all, just wanna look for some new music to listen to

.

Written by lainie at 05:29 PM on November 11, 2003.

I am so bloody addicted to these damned quizzes!! These things are an inane, utter waste of time, which of course means they're a huge Lainie magnet that attracts me the way a souped-up computer with every programme, MP3s, games and hardware I could ever want *stops for a moment to drool* would.


You are Form 5, Dragon: The Weaver.

"And The Dragon seperated the virtuous from
the sinful. He tore his eyes from his sockets
and used them to peer into the souls of those
on trial to make a judgement. He knew that
with endless knowledge came endless
responsibility."

Some examples of the Dragon Form are Athena
(Greek), St. Peter (Christian), and Surya
(Indian).
The Dragon is associated with the concept of
intelligence, the number 5, and the element of
wood.
His sign is the crescent moon.

As a member of Form 5, you are an intelligent and
wise individual. You weigh options by looking
at how logical they are and you know that while
there may not always be a right or wrong
choice, there is always a logical one. People
may say you are too indecisive, but it's only
because you want to do what's right. Dragons
are the best friends to have because they're
willing to learn.


Which Mythological Form Are You?


Interestingly enough, a dragon is what I chose to have tattooed on me I don't know about the whole tearing eyes out of sockets thing though, I take ten minutes to peel off a plaster, and fuck me if I would do something like that for someone else. I think [all religious people please stop reading right now] all martyrs are idiotic asses.

So there.

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Written by lainie at 06:03 PM on November 11, 2003.

And this woman proves it: Iskip.com

If I were one of those touchy-feely girls, I'd whip out the tissues and bloody cry at the condition our world is in today, what with fucktards telling people to skip to be happy and putting this up on their website 'Expressing joy in a positive way by skipping happily down the street'

But I'm not one of those soulful emo people out there, alright? If I saw this Heidi lookalike skipping down my driveway I'd back my car full speed into her before someone sends her to Tanjung Rambutan, a place we Malaysians reserve lovingly for looneys like her. Waste of Earth space.

Oh dear Lainie, so full of hate. Skip, my child, skip!
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Written by lainie at 08:15 PM on November 11, 2003.

Like, totally, give yourself a headache: Valley url

Instant reduction of IQ by 20 points everytime you click that link

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Written by lainie at 03:15 PM on November 12, 2003.

I keep getting all those thanks for wishing me good luck, do it again it worked! messages (and Lyne, if you're reading this, no, you're not the only one) that I think I should do this:

Yeay Lainie! Good luck Lainie! Good luck Lainie! Good luck Lainie!

Because I'll need it for tomorrow's exam. Of course my friends actually study, something I've yet to do because I'm either lazy, self-destructive, or both.

A bit mundane, I know, but just one more day to go and it'll all be happy happy joy joy you'd-wish-you-could-suffocate-me-with-a-pillow time!

I had the funkiest dream ever in a long time...It had an empty zoo with nothing but turtles and hares in it, papers with the numbers 5219 and 5216 written on them stuck everywhere (probably my exam paper results predicton: 5, 2, 1, 6 and 9 percent each), my friend and I time-travelling in what looks like Princess Mononoke's land, then coming back again after 20 years to start all over again..

Oh and when we came back, there was this little dough-like model of the earth and we remodelled it...i poked a finger somewhere, and in the real world Paris fell into a hole. I had the nations at my feet bwahahhahahah!!

Controlling complex indeed. Hmm. Good thing for you guys I don't rule the world then.

On a side note, I managed to add Cat Power to my Friendster list? I guess no one knows if it's really her or not...Pretty cool though huh?
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Written by lainie at 03:55 PM on November 12, 2003.

Got this quiz from yello's site:
------

last car ride: yesterday, when rish dropped me off home from college
last kiss: came from a dog :D
last good cry: can't for the life of me remember
last movie seen: Ginger snaps
last cuss word uttered: fuckau fucktards
last beverage drank: coke
last food consumed: some healthy type of cereal..i like em :D
last crush: so *not* convenient to post up here hahaha
last phone call: my mom, asking me if i studied
last tv show watched: that 70s show (i love it too much)
last shoes worn: kickbacks
last cd played: my mp3 cd, mainly cat power, beth orton, fiona apple, howie day, pj harvey, alanis morissette and ryan adams.
last item bought: somethin to tie up my hair, it's gettin hot here
last annoyance: walkin to the comp lab to find it closed (is it a public holiday or something here??)
last disappointment: haha...Friendster server was down
last soda drank: coke
last thing written: in my diary, which has a padlock, kept in a locked drawer in a locked cupboard..hehe
last word spoken: yo whassup
last sleep: i woke up at one in the afternoon...my mom called..
last im: don't know
last weird encounter: saw someone yesterday who looks freakily like a guy i used to know
last ice cream eaten: some coffee flavoured thingie
last time amused: a moment ago, i am online after all
last time wanting to die: years ago, i should think, if ever.
last time in love: maybe should change the question to 'last time u hallucinated'
last underwear worn: black undies
last shirt worn: some generation fuck you t shirt...it's notorious.
last time dancing: haha...long time..
last poster looked at: umm...i have orlando bloom on my wall, and avril lavigne...soo...i'm not fussy, anythin that has colour to brighten up my hostel room :D
last show attended: lady salsa
last webpage visited: mine
last cd bought: black eyed peas
last state visited: KL
last book read: Complete works of Poe
last place that swept you off your feet: in front of the biggest balai in malaysia...bad roadworks there :D

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Written by lainie at 11:59 AM on November 13, 2003.

Who said I didn't learn anything in college? (Well, me, but I stand corrected).

I lost my keys yesterday. The keys to where I stay in KL, my hostel door, room door, drawer key, cupboard key and diary key (omfg)!

Ah well, it was all normal when I told my housemate I'd need to borrow her key for the front door to duplicate. No one has my room key though, so I think I really scared my housemates last night by picking my room door open.

I don't know, they probably think nice young ladies shouldn't be able to open their room door with a phone card, or another room's key. Then they saw me pick the drawer lock too. That is a bit freaky to them I suppose. Poor lil college freshies, so young, so innocent. I've probably created the impression of comin from da hood, or sumthin.

Guess they're worried cause I'm usually te only one in the hostel and they're probably thinking I can get into their rooms and drawers (where the spare keys usually are) quite easily. Hmmm, how right they are. Lucky for them I'm quite nice *hee hee hee* and if there's only one thing I respect, it's privacy.

I can't pick all types of locks though...Just the simple ones like cupboards, drawers and well...3 types of doors locks :D Everytime I change the place I stay I try picking the locks...I like knowing how to do stuff sometimes.

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Written by lainie at 01:06 PM on November 13, 2003.

Let's Talk About Ya:


Name: Lainie

Nicknames: Lains, Slain, Slainder, yo, mick, lyck.

Are ya old?: Gimme a damn break, I'm only twenty!

Do ya have soo-pah-powers?: Oh yeah...Involuntary head banging without XTC, escapism, lock pickin, super (soo-pah?) sarcasm.

Addicted to: too many things. Caffeine and internet for example.

Best chat experience: Meeting this poet guy, he made the best limericks ever

Worst chat experience: Umm...when this girl I *was * friends with decided that she wanted to date me...then telling me she's straight...Fuck, what did that make me? Luke Skywalker?

5 closest friends: Rach Rish Rano Lyne....umm...not gonna continue adding the last name cause I like being able to breathe.

5 worst enemies: (all ex-classmates know this) Mr chan. My grandmother (die evil woman, just die. Hey, break a hip while you're at it). An ex-housemate with B.O who likes to eat her own hair. I'm not joking, she plucks them out and eats them. She has bald spots from doing that. Can't think of any others They aren't enemies, just people you'd do well to never mention in front of me.

Done anything illegal: Haha...the most notorious one will probably be the one that involved fire hydrants, burning paper, eggs, and the fire brigade and policemen walking around my apartment at 3 am in the morning...That was funny, had a whole crowd of ppl lookin up wondering what was happening. Rach and I told Ezra about it and he was like Oh so it was yoooooou!!

What's annoying?: Stepping in puddles. I hate that.

What's happening?: Ooooh....in-house lil parties, some friends, some booze, some idiocy. Always fun.

Tell me a joke: Wanna hear a big one? Lainie. (oh come on, laugh..)

Do u know any poetry?: Follow your saint, follow with accents sweet...Thomas Campion...I like stuff that rhymes

Music: Not again...Okay i just bought black eyed peas -elephunk and beth orton's daybreaker.

Are u a jerk?: Totally.

Do people love you?: can't hardly resist me.

Blue pill or red pill: Oh damn! I can't remember!...if i could have perfect dreams, I'd refuse to wake up (are u MAD?)

Fat people need love too: Like they need a diet. *hastily* okay, alright, I'm kidding, I'm kidding, I'm a jerk, remember????

You're a good person, underneath it all: Umm....*guiltily looks up at statement before this*....Yeah...sorta...

you hate Bush, right?: No, he's funny...who else could Mahathir take pot shots at so easily?

Add a question, and answer it:
So, what's up?: Nothing much, just about to fail the exam coming up in half an hour that my mother expects me to get a high Distinction for *smile*

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Written by lainie at 03:41 PM on November 13, 2003.

Hmmm...You comment, you trackback, you Google, you technorati. You wish you blogdexed.

Scary how accurate online tests can get :D

My exams are over and I need to go take a shower now, before I freak people out smelling too funky
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Written by lainie at 04:03 PM on November 13, 2003.

I was wondering why I always spend so much time on the internet till I counted what I do everytime I'm online

Check at least 3 hotmail accounts -write around 2 personal emails
Check at least 2 yahoo accounts- write around 3 personal emails
Check email on student server
Check tabulas.com (feedback, be a total blogwhore)
Check website stats.
Check MSN groups.
Check for new Naruto comics in Thienz.
Check for new Yamada Taro comics in sakura-crisis.net
Check Friendster

Read blogs:
www.bigwhiteguy.com
www.somethingpositive.net
http://asmallvictory.net
http://www.littleyellowdifferent.com
http://www.greenfairy.com
http://www.rabbitblog.com/
http://www.emandlo.com/

Read comics
http://brunostrip.com/bruno.html
http://somethingpositive.net
http://www.brunothebandit.com

And these are the things I do every time. Oh yeah.....

Written by lainie at 05:53 PM on November 13, 2003.

Risha is evil. Throughout my exam I had seven words running through my head:

Late nights,
Booty calls
Shiny disco balls

It's a damned assy dance track, and it ain't goin anywhere anytime soon
.

Written by lainie at 12:53 AM on November 14, 2003.

So guess how I ended an sms to my mother?

ps: my hair is blue

She took it quite well...she asked if aliens zapped it...I supposed it is easier to handle than the bright orange hair I had last time

It's only a temporary colouring though, I'm just checking to see how it looks on me, might go purple instead....Or electric blue. Something that will annoy old people will be nice. A remote possibility is green ala she-hulk.

Just perfect for all the family photos that will be taken during my cousin's wedding, after all, nostalgic photographic memories of this century should always involve one idiot with neon hair.

Any other colour suggestions for moi? (just don't mention blonde or grey).
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Written by lainie at 01:18 AM on November 14, 2003.

Yeay me....trust me to get the one result available that shows tit grabbing....oooh and look! Blur hair! I'm seeing signs everywhere


Pervert


What's your sexual appeal?
brought to you by Quizilla

Hmmm....so should I go blue? I'm thinking electric blue...
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Written by lainie at 06:30 PM on November 14, 2003.

I took my flatmate from Indonesia around KLCC and Times Square today, attracting a lot of attention cause my hair is very, very blue

I tend to forget till I see people do a double take. It's not like I tattooed the picture of an ass on my face yknow, I just have anime hair..

Well, I'm probably gonna make my way back to Ipoh tomorrow, and if I'm already getting looks in the capital of the country, it'll be interesting to see what people in lil ol Ipoh will think.

Oh yeah, me with my big, bad hair doing all the charity work my mother has planned for me, painting clogs pink to sell in British India and dealing with screaming kids.

Forget bad ass if you're my mother's daughter. Think potentially undignified situations put upon u. I'll be painting flowers on pink clogs soon. Have pity.
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Written by lainie at 12:19 AM on November 15, 2003.

This is something I've kept in my inbox for ages...I love it

-----
Revision

At first I was afraid, I was petrified

Kept thinking I could never pass without revision guides,

But then I spent so many nights, getting all the questions wrong,

And I grew strong, And I learned how to scrape along,

I won't look back, to any place,

When I can swallow 15 shots and get completely off my face,

I would have spent all day at work,

I would have had no spare time free,

If I'd thought for just one second my exams would bother me,

So all my notes, are on the floor,

Don't even matter... that there's no Comedy night anymore...

Weren't you the one who tried to get me to revise?

Did you think I'd crumble?

Did you think I'd work towards the skies?

Oh no, no I I won't revise

Unless I die from alcohol, I know I'll stay alive,

Though my money's at an end, I've my overdraft to spend,

I won't revise, I won't revise!!

Hey hey

It took all the strength I had, not to act the part,

But in the end my real revision didn't even start.

I used to sit at home at night, feeling guilty to myself,

I used to try, But now I hold my head up high,

And you see me

Somebody new

I'm not that mixed up weird person who wants a good 2:2

So if you feel like dropping in, chances are that I'll be free,

Coz I've gonna fuck all revision, and I'm failing my degree,

Oh no, not I I won't revise,

I think that I may scrape a third, but I could be telling lies

Let the lecturers all scorn,

My bed's far too nice and warm,

I won't revise, I won't revise

----

Ever so suitable huh?

Written by lainie at 01:11 AM on November 15, 2003.

Lately I feel a bit drained, like I've been walking on broken glass to get to the other side, and now that I'm there all my blood's left behind and I can't move anymore.

When I hear myself talking like this, I know it's time to spiritually reconnect with myself; rest, relax and recharge.

I don't know when I got so into what seems like new-age woo-woo, but I do know enough of myself by now to work things out when I can.

On a side note, my tarot cards say that I will be depressed and tired (correct) as a result of past struggle relating to mind matters (just finished exams) but it will all end well, with the help of friends (ya hear that? move it people!).

Oh. I read tarot cards, have I mentioned that before? I can get scarily accurate too sometimes. Just what I need...more ways to freak people out.

And now I'm off to meditate. Yeay me. Lainie, all-time woo woo practitioner.
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Written by lainie at 03:15 AM on November 15, 2003.

I'm going back to my hometown Ipoh tomorrow, if I can get transport....I have no idea what I'm gonna do there, especially when all my friends are *not* there (rano why'd you have to go so soon, why? whyyyyyyyyyy????)...

For one week only, I suppose, the Gwen is coming back I can't remember when my church camp is though...would be ironic if i had to leave as she comes

Meanwhile, this is my plan for the week

veg out in front of tv
burn cds
remember how to drive again
walk around jusco and parade (the only 2 malls ppl my age really go to -if ever)
watch movies
download download download
permanent colour for hair

does anyone have any idea what songs I can download? anything goes....
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Written by lainie at 03:47 PM on November 15, 2003.

I'm in a cyber cafe, waiting for 4.30 to come so I can get on my bus and get on home. Was a bit pissed off just now.

Walking on the way to the bus stand, two tourist guys coming from the other way and starting at me, then not caring if I heard or not one said to the other 'Shit look at her hair. Only stupid people will do such a thing. These asians're so wannabe'.

Sigh. This is me we're talking about here. Me, before food, before coffee, walking in the hot sun, Me.
I stopped walking, and when they were just about to walk past me I stuck out my arm, barred him across the chest and asked quietly 'You have anything to say to my face?'

Being the chicken heads that they are the guy who was listening just said 'umm, look...we didn't know that...well'

'That what? I have functioning ears attached to my head? That a girl can have more balls than two chicken-shit fuckaus like you two? Shit you assholes, I don't know where malaysia got that nice-to tourists reputation but I didn't contribute to it! Shit!'

Then the guy who said I'm a stupid wannabe did some 'oh I'm so much more intelligent than you Asians' eye-rolling, and sarcastically said 'oh i'm sooo sorry'.

So I took a threatening step towards his friend, and when he backed off immediately, hands sorta halfway flying up, I knew he wasn't going to do much for his ass friend so I just kicked his friend right in the nuts. Not that up-from-between his legs type of kick, more a get-the-fuck-away-from-me kick in the front of his nuts.

It works as well anyway. Some cars honked in congratulations, the shop owner of the garage laughed and one guy on the motorbike did a 'whooooo!!'. As expected, the other guy didn't do anything so I just said 'Shit, now you're sorry' and walked away.

Moral of the story is: do not fuck around with Lainie before her coffee.

You know, I was stressed when that happened, but now that I think back on it, I feel positively glowy. Hey could have been worse right? It's not like I spat on him then took his money. I just gave him the honour of telling people back home that his holiday was ruined caused a stupid wannabe girl kicked his balls flat.

No stop to Thailand for him anytime soon then.
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Written by lainie at 10:25 PM on November 15, 2003.

Sometimes news spread fast. Josie just called to ask me about the balls-kicking, and I didn't tell her

Sometimes news spread slow. Rachel apparently has a boyfriend, and it's been going on for a few days. If only I could kick her through sms.

Interesting how friendships evolve with age. Now it's no longer about knowing everything that's happening in someone's life, but rather connecting, understanding and accepting.

Wise mature words from someone who just lowered another gene-pool infection from adding more semen into the world. Not a bad thing either.
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Written by lainie at 11:37 PM on November 15, 2003.

And so it begins. Within 10 minutes of me arriving home, my mother has announced that I will be baking cookies on Monday.

Oh well, there goes my plans for slacking off, hanging round malls and stuff then.

It's not charity this time (for once), but I'll be off to Aunty Marguerita's house to bake cookies my aunt will be giving away as those lil gifts that set kids running around on sugar highs during my cousin's wedding.

I'm not sure why it's gonna be done in Aunty M's house, but I think it has something to do with her kitchen, think it's the most adequately equipped, since that's where they churn out the New Year cookies and Bake Sale stuff too.

I have butter fingers so no idea how I'm actually gonna help *shrug* the last time they did some pineapple tarts thingie I screwed up everything I tried I ain't very domesticated. I mentioned to my mom, but nope, no getting out of it, she says I can sprinkle almonds and type out lists or something.

Whoopee me. Monday is bake day.

Whatever, I'm just glad my mom's not anally into all these, my life would be hell if I were to be dragged into every charity in town. Speaking of my mom, she has me addicted to some wild wild west word game from gamehouse.com :/

Written by lainie at 01:06 AM on November 16, 2003.

Now that I'm back home, with my hands on my MP3 collection, I'm having a good laugh- not because my music is bad although Shu made me download some really bad boyband ones .

The laughs I'm getting are from my joke MP3s

These are my two favourite entertainers who can be found on Kazaa, with a few suggestions if you'd like to know what to download.

Wanda Sykes
I like everything she does.
Get Comedy Central Presents
The Dream.mp3
Internet Sex Site.mp3
She is funnnnnnnnny

Ellen Degeneres :
I love everything, but hey here are a few

Get Taste This if you can, that's the full one.
Parts of Taste This broken up in Kazaa to individual MP3s include:
Birds in Mating.mp3
Iroquis Indians.mp3
Children.mp3
embarassing moments.mp3

I love listening to these two, they're hilarious, it's no Mort Sahl, but sometimes for outright, outrageous laughs, ya gotta go with pop humour!

Listening to some songs too, here they are:

Frankie J - Ya no es igual (Don't wanna try)
The Clash - Should I stay or should I go now
Melissa Etheridge - You can sleep while I drive
Rolling Stones - Wild Horses
Muse - Plug in baby
Natalie Imbruglia - Wishing I was there
Nick Cave - Rainy night in soho
Jesse Malin - Queen of the underworld
No Doubt- Just a girl
Nyoy Volante - Cold summer nights
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Written by lainie at 01:37 AM on November 16, 2003.

I just read a 4 books series from Books of Magic called The Invisible Labyrinth. Neil Gaiman is my pagan ass's god, and john bolton's illustration is beautiful.

Books of Magic has and likely always will be my favourite comic.

It is upsetting to me that people who have recently noticed it accuses them of copy-catting Harry Potter (young boy, thick glasses, magic) especially since it's preceeded HP for years.

It's like when someone tells me books like Chronicles of Narnia are following the way shown by JK Rowling. Goddamit. Narnia did not follow, it paved the damned way.

Trying telling those pop-culture plebeians out there.
I wish I could throttle away those blank looks from their faces when I mention Kingsley or Lewis. Dammit! Did none of these people read as children?

Written by lainie at 08:54 PM on November 16, 2003.

Whoooo I'm surviving on too little sleep, I conked out at 5am last night (morning?), and woke up early to watch the Matrix, which I thought was pretty cool, the graphics were great!

Am watching a documentary on Shi Huang Ti...here's something scary- even though his family was all supposedly murdered when he died, my ancestor was some high court official in China, with the family name -now bastardised to Choon, but still the same in Mandarin as compared to the Emperor...We have pictures of 2 scary looking old people in full court attire...we don't hang it up, just cause it's too creepy.

Temperament fits though. We're a pretty bad-tempered, demanding and bossy family. Everyone on my mom's side of the family is mad. This is not the typical whining you get from everyone, there really is something wrong with us. Every single one of us talk to ourselves, for one thing. In public.

My uncle falls into trances while he's driving and starts talking to *no one* -he's been warned it's a sign of schizophrenia, my aunt sets aside an hour or two every night to talk to herself because she's the best conversationalist she knows, my mom doesn't realise she's muttering to herself when she's angry, and as for me, I love talking to myself, I really do.

Sometimes I don't know I'm doing it. People are talking to me, and I've phased out, sometimes speaking to myself in my mind, sometimes it's a tad freakier as I talk to myself outloud. I don't really bother to hide it, too much of a bother. Most people know anyway.

Ouch...my wisdom teeth hurt, they're comin out..Wish I was like my mother, she doesn't have any. Went for an x-ray, and the dentist told her it's not embedded or anything, they just aren't there. Most of her sisters don't have wisdom teeth either.

My father told my mother that the absence explains why she's stupid.
My mom retorted that that's why she married him
Woooooooooo! Go Mom! Hahaha.

In other, even less interesting news, I finally managed to complete a cryptic crossword without the help of a dictionary. FINALLY! Before this I could only manage with the biggest dictionary in the house, everytime I didn't use it I could never solve the crossword, if ever.

Makes me jealous to watch mother ticking off answers to The Star and NST so easily...
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Written by lainie at 09:45 PM on November 16, 2003.

I'm just so addicted to these online quizzes...anyways, it's a good relaxation and laugh thing to do...my mother forced me to go shopping today (yes I have to be forced) for clothes.

Being from Ipoh, that of course meant a stop at the boutique Nishiki, which was packed as usual. Wasn't all bad though, Ee Laine was there (her mom owns the shop) so caught up a bit on what's been up with my ex classmates. Sigh...my mother pulled out skirt after skirt after skirt. I do not want to see any clothes that doesn't have one hole for each leg for a very, very long time.

She has a penchant for pulling out girly clothes, and omfg, my threshold for skirts only lasts so long. I sneaked away from her a few times, explaining to Ee Laine in whispers *tattoo...ankle...mom doesn't know*

Ah well. And I just found out today is Sunday, not Saturday, which means I'm off to bake cookies tomorrow. Sigh. No internet for hours, I may not survive, goodbye world



Your serial killer name would be Diablo! You would
be a mastermind in what you do. You would come
up with perfect plans on how to do your bad
stuff, and send out your minions to do it for
you. That would prevent you from getting
caught, because for one reason, they would not
rat you out. Your real name might not be known
and you would be greatly wanted, because as
long as you're out on the hidden streets, there
will still be danger! You're the big guy/girl!


What Would Your Serial Killer Name Be? What Would the Public Know You As?

It figures I'd get Daria, suspected as much I would anyway


You are Daria from Daria. You are full of sadness
and everything bad. You love to read, and you
are very smart. However, you are cool to
others. Even though you are so smart and quiet,
you seem cool to others. You get mad at others
quickly, but you only show it in your face. You
are very anti-social, but you do have a couple
of friends one or two. You are pretty
depressed. You have very little happiness in
you. You are very different from others. You
make the school seem much better because you
are not the exact same as the other girls. You
are not very religious, however. Actually, you
are not religious at all. Most likely, you are
going to die of cancer - sorry for that. Good
luck desperate person!


What Cartoon Are You?


YOU BEAT OLD LADIES FOR PILLS!!!


what's YOUR deepest secret?
For pills? WTF? Am I stupid? I'd take their money and prescriptions, kill 2 birds with 1 stone.


Johnny Depp. You tend to like eccentric hotties.
Dare to be different!


Which Long Hair Hottie would you date?

The way the quiz was going, I'm hardly surprised....wish I had a Benny and Joon vcd though, wouldn't mind a watch!


Fight Club!


What movie Do you Belong in?(many different outcomes!)


Congratulations!! You're a shot of some good old
hard liquor!


What Drink Are You?


You are Jesse Custer.
Jesse is as tough as they come and always willing
to prove it. He'll kick your ass for being a
jackass. Or back you up if you prove that
you're a man. An actual good guy, Jesse's word
and honor is without reproach.


What Gritty No Nonsense Comic Book Character are You?

Awwwrigggggggght!! haha...I might have preferred John Constantine, and maybe Spider Jerusalem, but hell yeah this is pretty cool! (how nerdy do i sound, huh?)

Written by lainie at 12:31 AM on November 17, 2003.

Maturedly handled conversation between me and my Ass-Friend

Ass-Friend: Thinking about my crush...

[Lainie reads the message and sighs]

Lainie: Okay, I'll bite, who do you have a crush on?
Ass: What?? *insert name here*! Who else?
Lainie: Unfair! Since when did 'I think he's cute' evolve into a crush?
Ass: Ohhh he's soooo shyyyy! It's annoying! *whine* Lainieeeeeeeee
Lainie: Tell you what, next time you 2 get together, I'll load both of you up on alcohol and you can jump him, or better yet, he'll jump you.

Yeah, Lainie Yeoh, sensitive problem-solver, emphatic friend.

And to prove it, here's a link to all sensitive men who would like their breasts to start dripping milk.
For the other guys (no, I'm sensitive, I wouldn't forget about you) who would rather look at pictures of vagina art
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Written by lainie at 01:26 PM on November 17, 2003.

You know what's great about having a friend who's known you so long she not only understands you're weird, she can have a bit of fun with it too?

[actual sms conversation that took place some time ago]

Lainie: Boora boora?
Risha: Wooga wooga?
Lainie: Ookie wookie?
Risha: Zippy tippy!
Lainie: Bawwra dawwra!!!

[and is probably a reflection of how your fun moments can be other people's example of a sad life led, and a waste of credit]
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Written by lainie at 08:20 PM on November 17, 2003 as a favorite post.

Well, today I trooped off with my mom to help my aunts bake cookies. Help, you'll discover, is a very relative term, especially when it comes from someone who's slept very little the past few days.

I stood around like a lump of clay in the beginning for round an hour, cause they were makin dough, or something (I have no idea), then came my turn to help out. I sprinkled sugar. Pink sugar. Then violet sugar. All over love-shaped cookies.

[tells myself it's for your cousin's wedding <-repeat numerous times to deal with it]

I can imagine the faces of the people I scare on a daily basis in KL, bursting with laughter at Lainie, the official sugar-sprinkler for bake day. The pink-sugar-sprinkling, move-the-cookies-from-tray-to-container, count em while you're at it sugar fairy.

You'd think what I had to do is simple compared to what my aunts were doing, but nooooo. I had to cut overly-large sheets of baking paper, and promptly forgot about the buttery strips of paper I left on the table cause I was called upon to *sprinkle sprinkle sugar*. Within 10 minutes everyone was stepping on sticky buttery paper that flew off the table to the floor. Hehe, whoops.

The cookies I was stacking into containers fell over like heaven knows how many times, I almost laughed when they were so careful transferring em to the car, I'd dropped, shook and probably miscounted the cookies too many times already.

Then the oven handle gets stuck, it always does. I don't know if it's meant to be child-proof, but it's certainly adult-proof as well. They asked me to punch the handle that was stuck inside. Oh sure, I really want to punch that psycho-cuckoo oven. My dream come true to be incinerated by that temperamental oven when it explodes cause mommy told me to punch it.

But wait, we made 200++ cookies, only a thousand more to go tomorrow *faints*.

There was this little boy in diapers there, I tried scaring him by pulling what I assumed were scary faces, which he seemed to find infinitely amusing instead. I don't know what all that time spent training in choral speaking was for then.

Had to leave mid-way to pick Gazel up from work. First time she's in the car while I drive cause she had a headache. I normally let her drive for a helluva good reason. She could *not* stop freaking out over the way I drive, like she's under some delusion that she's a safe driver. Maybe cause she knows I don't have my driving license with me. I admit, it was raining, maybe I'm a bit wilder than she's used to, but dammit, why can't she just JAM at imaginary brakes the way my mother does instead of screeching right into my ear while I'm trying to do something illegal and tricky with the car. Stupid.

Then, of course, Natalie, the girl who lives there and is normally included in all these (damn) stuff our mothers come up with came into the kitchen midway with some 'ha-ha I'm gonna relax and watch you suffer and screw up' sorta thing going on. What can I say, two girls, only one working, from that perspective I don't come off as the smarter one do I? She's grown a lot taller, she used to be some lil pee-wee girl *who recently had to saunter around in a skirt, her favourite past time - yeah, laugh Nat, laugh*

Then her sister, Krystal comes home after her last day of exams. Right after she finishes whooping I tell her 'hehe you're baking cookies tomorrow' but she said something about screwing that and watching tv the whole day.

So yeap, still only one dumb girl left behind. It wasn't all bad, the aunts are funny and really very dirty-minded (hehe) but waittaminute.....1000 more cookies tomorrow *faints*.
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Written by lainie at 10:41 PM on November 17, 2003.

My mother is on the phone, talking to her friend about their daughters, exams, and results.

It is time to make a quiet, unobtrusive little getaway before she hangs up, and asks me how I'm gonna do.

*hee hee*
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Written by lainie at 11:36 PM on November 17, 2003.

*Gyarrrghghghggurglegurglegurgle*

That, my friends, was the sound of me choking on frustration.

My mother (notice how she just dominates me world when I'm back home?) just told me to turn off my music just so she can watch her tv

I'll be damned if i turn off my Fiona Apple just so she can feed her couch potato habits!

But ooooh wait, it's Just Shoot Me! Hehe, well, maybe just a little while then *clicks Pause*
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Written by lainie at 09:04 PM on November 18, 2003 as a favorite post.

My dad met up with me tonight, took the family out for dinner. Counting the 1 hour he spent with me tonight, I have seen him a grand total of less than 2 hours since my birthday in the beginning of May (and very possibly even a lot earlier than that).

Anyways (try and keep track here of what i'm gonna say), mom told me my aunt intends to put my sister and I in charge of my grandmother during Julian's wedding.
My fucking ass and its hole I am going to fucking even sit at the same table as her.

If anyone is dumb enough to put me in charge of my grandmother during that wedding, they must want her to drink some drunkard's piss with her tea cause that's what I'll do if I have to leave little cups in all the toilets in the restaurant.

It says a lot about a woman (or she-devil) when she has 7 grandchildren and none of them like her. Here's a little family tree thingie of my cousins who share the same grandmother.

Julian: Getting married, never heeds mom who tries to get him to do stuff for gran.
Jody: Couldn't give less of a shit either.
Justin: Youngest of 3 brothers, usually forced to do the errands. If I recall, he skives off them too. He doesn't like her either.

Pang Jin: Doesn't like her, lives safely away from her in Singapore.
Pang Tee: This is the most congenial guy I know, and he actually admitted to thinking my gran is like the devil.

Gazel, Me: We think it wouldn't be a bad thing if she dies right now.

So yes, I couldn't be arsed if she loses all her teeth falling down at the dinner, Julian's getting married meaning Justin and Jody will be getting drunk outta their minds, if an escort is needed for that woman, Pang Jin or Tee can take care of her, if they will. Geez.
.

Written by lainie at 12:50 AM on November 19, 2003.

Just did this quiz to bugger some time away while I chat online

_____ST0P_____
they call me: Lainie
also: Lains, nut abuse, slainders, kim (to family and family friends)
sex: oh, okay.
my first breath of air: 8th may
age: 20
status: single, and lets keep it that way for some time
occupation: semi-violent, apathetic slacker.
nationality: Malaysian.


_______REWIND_______
most memorable memory: laughing a lot, with friends
worst?: ?? as if I'd even try to remember it, i always forget bad stuff
first word uttered: no idea. mom says i called my dad.
first bestfriend ever!?: FIRST? Geez....like kiddie-type best friend? Drea.


_______FAST FOWARD_______
college planning to go to: graduated years ago.
future resident of: beats me, always movin round *shrug*
wedding: dont intend to, i mean, who wants to pick one person and live with that person for...i don't know...more than 5 years??
children: ...all my friends say i shouldn't have any..too many sadistic plans ready for them.
looking forward to: my long, long, 5 months of holidays
NOT looking forward to: well, my results are coming out.


_______PLAY_______
feeling: happy...lots of funny friends online. It's great.
listening: cranberries - linger
talking to: everyone online!
doing: socialising online?
thinking of: umm..i just suggested to someone to marry a hairy dwarf sooo....hmm...
craving: coffee, as usual
missing: my friends overseas I'm very friend-orientated.
hating: poor Lainie, so full of hate


_______FAVORITEZ_______
song: gyaaAAAHH!! evil question!! next!
radio station: Wow fm *cry* i miss it so much, especially Triple W and Hard Drive
tv show: Just shoot me
channel: Channel V, if i *must* choose
site: somethingpositive.net
movie: Must I pick? Ok, one of em is Chasing Amy
store: none
mall: KLCC
hang out spot: anywhere, yo...great at bumming around
actor: john malkovich
actress: ..... .....umm.... .... ..... ...natalie portman, in The Professional.
food: Japanese
character: Naruto
book: i can never choose


_______LOVE_______
love is: popular, isn't it?
first love: first hallucination?
current love: no one.
love or lust?: neither.
best love song: PJ Harvey -This is Love. rocks out.
is it possible to be in love w/ more than one person @ the same time?: yeap. polygamy, remember?
when love hurts: friends panic.
true or false; all you need is love: oh that and some friends, some air, some sustenance, some books, some of everything.
is there such thing as love @ first sight? yeah, it's everywhere on Ally Mcbeal


_______MALE SPECIES_______
turn ons: So not gonna bother. I name many many things, then I look at the guys I end up liking and go...'Wtf?'...
turn offs: stupidity. u have no idea how low my tolerance is for that. I can very safely say if you're my friend, it's veeeery unlikely that you're stupid unless I'm not a good judge of character (and i'd like to think i am).
does your parent`s opinion on your bf/gf matter to you?: nope. I told my mom if she harasses me anymore about my choices I'd marry a muslim, negro, 80 year old woman. Sorry, I know that's xenophobic, but it works at keeping her quiet.
what kinda hair style?: I like bald but basically anything will do...I don't really like the whole regular-gelled spike hair, though some are okay.
where do you go to meet new people?: out.
are you the type of person to ‘holler’ n ask for numbers?: nope.


________PICKY PICKY_______
dog or cat: dog
short or long hair: long
innie or outie: innie
sunshine or rain: i like rain, but sunsets are my fave colours in a scene.
moon or sun: moon. nightowl.
basketball or football: neither.
righty or lefty: righty
hugs or kisses: both.
1 best friend or 10 acquaintances: ...well, in perspective, I'm willing to tell 10 people to fuck off to keep my best friend, but I won't tell 10 people to fuck off just cause my best friend says i should.
bf/gf or best friend: best friend.
tv or radio: tv.
starbucks or jamba juice: coffeebean? starbucks, if i must
mc donalds or burger king: mcds.
summer or winter: winter
written letters or e-mails: email. totally.
playstation or nintendo: playstation
disney or nickelodeon: disney
car or motorcycle: car
house party or club: house party
sing or dance: you obviously haven't heard me sing. dance it is then.
freak or slow dance: freak freak freak
yahoo messenger or aim: neither
google or ask jeeves?: google.


_______MiSCELLANEOUS_______
can you swim?: yeah.
what's your most embarrassing moment?: Here, let me post it online so all my friends can read about it and turn it into me all-new most embarrassing moment
what's under your bed?: books, magazines, paper, sketches, pencils.
what are you scared of?: the dark it's so pathetic, i know.
what is your greatest accomplishment?: i *know* i've done a lotta stuff...i just can't remember?? erm..getting full marks for an exam, and i didn't even read half the questions. pure luck. or...winning some tennis trophies...or bein part of the team of choral speaking state champions?
what kinda roof is over your head?: One i helped put up.
do you like tomatoes?: only sometimes. i hate ketchup.
internet connection: streamx
how many TVs in the house?: 4. i carted one off to uni
how many phones?: 3.
how many residents?: 3. I guess i don't count, seeing as to how i'm in uni
how many DVDs do you have?: i don't like countin that much.
last dentist visit: erm..was supposed to be last year, but i skived.
last doctor visit: recently. i get injured a lot.
last phone call: few minutes ago.
last IM : less than 10 seconds ago.

Music of the Moment: from the singer/songwriter type
Currently feeling happy, sarcastic too

Written by lainie at 10:13 AM on November 19, 2003.

I woke up early today to go out with Gazel. My sister's an auditor, so she goes to a lotta different places to work, and if I want to use her car, I have to follow her and remember where her workplace is.

I'm no morning bird, I didn't even bother today to try and remember where she's working even though i have to pick her up cause I have a super crapiola sense of direction. I'm not sure if I could find my old school if I want to, and I live in a small town.

On the drive back home, I just kept thinking to myself

Few more minutes, few more minutes, don't close your eyes, wake up. Don't flip off the indian man on the motorcycle. Don't run down those old women marketing. Ignore the glares u just got -few more minutes and you're home few more minutes you can sleep

The moment I open the gate, before I can even open the house door, my mom comes running towards it, throws door open and tells me she's made me coffee so I can take her out shopping in a few moments, because it's bad for me to go to sleep, but good for her to go shopping. Pre-emptive attack, no? She had coffee ready!

Okay, enough. If I wanna survive this woman, I need to get away, am gonna go KL for a few days soon.
.

Written by lainie at 04:09 PM on November 19, 2003.

Picked my sister up from work early today cause she's sick (reaction to coffee....who the hell in my family can't take coffee?? Apparently, only Gazel).

It was fun anyhow, picked up some pirated vcds near the clinic since Kill Bill will probably be banned (I love Tarantino's films), and then made it back to the clinic in time to see Gazel getting an injection (hehehe). Anyone in Ipoh needs to know where to get the vcds? I can help! :D

The doctor reminded me that I used to run under the table, and everywhere I could, and it took all his nurses and my mom to hold me down when it was my turn to get my immunity shots. Geez, I was 7 and naughty, get over it

I am sooo sleepy.....Finally found Joanna on Friendster, which is great cause i lost contact with her after college -great girl.

Anyways, my friend Keet has her finals up on Friday, and she's doing the hospitality and tourism course in Sunway, so I'm gonna show up on Friday for the lunch she'll have to cater on that day. She fails the Marketing part of her course if not enough people show up

You know, even though Gazel was sick as hell, she didn't want me to drive because of the one and only time I drove while she's in the car. Said she could do without the heartbreak and headache of watching me drive since I drive dangerously and she doesn't want me to do anything illegal in her car, especially without my license.

I decided not to tell her that today alone, oh let's see, went the wrong way in a 1 way street, beat the red light-thrice too, bullied my way across three lanes to turn at the other end of the road I have a bad sense of direction, I somehow ended up on the wrong end of the road. And this was today

Yeah. That which does not kill her only makes you stronger and all that, but I was afraid that I *would* kill her if I told her all that, what with her heart palpitations, sweating and mumbling 'i'm gonna vomit i'm gonna vomit' while she drove, clenching her knuckles on the steering wheel till the colour matched her face. I had to think of my own self-preservation.

Kinda says a lot about what she thinks of my driving huh? What she'd rather go through than have me drive.
.

Written by lainie at 07:39 PM on November 19, 2003.

You know what I can't stop playing?

I've been a bad bad girl
I've been careless with a delicate man
And it's a sad sad world
When a girl will break a boy
Just because she can

Don't you tell me to deny it
I've done wrong and I want to
Suffer for my sins

I've come to you 'cause I need
Guidance to be true
And I just don't know where I can begin
What I need is a good defense
'Cause I'm feeling like a criminal

And I need to be redeemed
To the one I've sinned against
Because he's all I ever knew of love
Heaven help me for the way I am
Save me from these evil deeds
Before I get them done

Part of a song by Fiona Apple - Criminal

Sigh, I think i'd feel like a better person if I didn't identify so much with this song. A good defense, sometimes, we could all use one.

Written by lainie at 03:05 PM on November 21, 2003.

My brain is dead. It's run outta my head and gone off for a holiday, and it's not coming back till it's fully recovered (which may be never but hey, it's not like I use it much- I can spare it, I have another one in my ass).

I had a movie marathon last night. I watched Kil Bill, Naked Weapon, Freaky Friday, Hollywood Homicide and The Omen. Then I got up early today to attend the lunch my friend is involved in for her Finals in Hospitality (look, waking up for lunch counts as early, okay?).

Sigh...I'm too rash, I threw away my contact lenses cause they were annoying me and I didn't have contact lens solution with me in Sunway. Now I'm blind, and I need to get my ass to Pyramid soon to get more.

I have eyesight like my mother, stand 6 feet away from me and I can't tell if you're my friend, sister, dad or robber. My nose is currently an inch away from the screen, and I can still hardly see what I'm typing.

Else keeps asking me stuff about the course we're taking. She's asking me when the next semester is starting 0_o. I don't even know when results are coming out! But yeah, granted I will not be in Ipoh, within physical proximity of mom, when that happens *tralalalalaaaaaaa*

In other news, the girl I spoke of earlier, Natalie, finally had to bake cookies. Yeah, she had it coming *cackle cackle*...Suffer...Nat...I bet her sister was smart enough to *not* be caught at the TV room.

Let's see...Will probably go shopping. Might go to KL since Gazel is there today. She's off to Australia tomorrow, and she asked if I wanted anything. I'm thinking, I'm thinking, and geeeez, how sad am I, can't even think of a souvenir to get. Oh well, lucky for her then.

Hmm, Else just asked me what the movie Bedazzled was about, and I gave the whole sypnosis, character list, plot and ending. I didn't even like the movie. Just goes to show that the reason I'm quite dumb most of the time is my large reserve of memory space for cheesy movies.

Now to go to Friendster.com *clicks* *clicks*. Lainie gets lost in the abyss, will crawl out again in a few days.
.

Written by lainie at 04:16 PM on November 21, 2003.

Something rather funny happened just now

First, I taught Else how to pick her room lock, since skillz come in handy sometimes.

Then, I wanted to change outta my jeans but she wouldn't leave my room, so I said if you won't go out you might as well come in *pulls Else in, she laughs and says yes (so naive, these college freshies)*

Then I continue my sentence '' and we might as well have monkey sex since you're in here"

Haha...she thwacked my arm and left really fast -girl on girl? no? ahh shame, byeeee now :D

Well, at least I got to change into my shorts in peace. Hell, if she was gonna spend so much time in my room while I'm taking off my clothes, she might as well be of use, right?

Ironically, after that I went to check up on her, and walked in on her in her bra -haha she was changing this time.

She's asking why I'm typing this into my journal. Hell, what's not to tell the world about ei?
.

Written by lainie at 03:21 PM on November 22, 2003.

Is it still Friday? I lost track..holidays do that to me
Got this off Weis

1. List five things you'd like to accomplish by the end of the year.
- Work on my websites, especially the xanga one
- finish reading homer
- survive all the weddings this year. At least I get to see all the Ipoh Yeohs, i hardly do anymore
- Improve my drawings of muscles, especially on a female torso
- yeah. yeap. mm-hmm. i don't plan that much.

2. List five people you've lost contact with that you'd like to hear from again.
- Janice - if the dick wasn't dating a wanted drug dealer, therefore changing phone numbers and locations all the time, it wouldn't be so troublesome.
- Shakee - i think she's forgotten about me
- Kesha...nice girl, which reminds me i told her i'm email her soon
- ...i don't lost contact much...lessee...
- Gwen, but i'm seeing her tomorrow? Pawan...but i'm seeing him next week...see? i don't lose contact much


3. List five things you'd like to learn how to do.
- play the guitar *again*...sigh...i don't wanna cut my nails
- advanced css would be nice, any languages, spoken or computer
- levitation, hell yeah!
- I'd like to learn tarot readings that use the whole damn deck, i can do a limited amount of spreads right now.
- good card tricks.

4. List five things you'd do if you won the lottery (no limit).
- Make sure the tax on lottery is already paid for (hell, i'm lazy, not completely stupid)
- get my parents whatever they want, cause the next time they see me i'll have dropped out of Accounting into art school and will also have 20 tattoos and blue hair. Hell, tattoos for everyone, on me!
- Charity, mainly for the homes around Ipoh (damn...my mother..she's completely brainwashed me) especially Daybreak and the MC school orphanage, and help put better facilities into the local schools.
- hmm....90% of remaining money shall be invested under advise from financial advisors, and 10% to make friends and family happy?

5. List five things you do that help you relax.
- Listen to music
- read
- mind-numb myself in movies
- spend time with friends (universal cure, innit?)
- listen to joke mp3s -mainly Wanda Sykes and Ellen deGeneres

Written by lainie at 03:56 PM on November 22, 2003.

Do you believe that what goes around, comes around? I believe in it one day, think it's a load of crock the next

See, the thing is, two days ago, my dad dropped me off at the bus station since I'm coming to KL

Lainie: Bye dad!
Dad: Bye...don't befriend any strangers
Lainie: Heh?

....i'm twenty, and just so you know, I was wondering what the heck my father thinks I do in buses? Rub myself against strangers???? So I told him off (in much more polite terms of course), then made a mental note not to tell him what irc, icq, msn messenger, Y! and friendster is for. Oh, no-indeedy.

So yes, what goes around, just about to get to that part

I don't know if any of you remember, or even read, the part where I said i'd make a pretty good stalker. Oh yeah, can you see where this is going? If I don't attract trouble, I tend to cause it.

So i'm walking around Times Square, when I spot two tourists walking around (no, no, didn't kick any balls this time), and erm...this is gonna sound sad. When I see cute guys, and if I'm really bored, I like to follow em around malls, see what they do and all.

In fact, last year I let Rach in on my lil past-time and this is what she replied 'Don't worry babes, I do it all the time - it's fun!'

So I'm following these two guys around and all is well, when they enter Debenhams. Debenhams is a bit deserted, and yknow...it's hard to disguise me in a Mens Clothing Department. Sigh, first mistake.

I thought they didn't spot me till I saw them sorta doing the nudge and whisper thing, so decided to...you know...disappear. Even more bored now, I walk around, when geez who should I bump into around 15 minutes later near Pizza Uno, but the two guys

It's fate! Can't fight fate, no-sirree. One of the guys grinned when he saw me, so I grinned back. I was grinning a 'haha' grin, but he took it for a 'yeap i'm your Malaysian stalker haha' grin. They came up, talked for a while, went for a drink (might as well, I was thirsty from all the stalking -see? can't fight fate!)...It's kinda funny cause I think Im antisocial

They were a bit older than I thought, I was thinking 22- 24, but they were 28 and 32 (okay fine, I was off by a decade or so, my bad). Talked a bit, then gave some lamer excuse about needing to get to my aunt's place.....I really didn't want them getting any ideas

Hey, at least I'm a fun stalker! :D Could be worse, I could be one of those annoying internet stalkers who won't tell you my real identity even though I know yours, and message you all the time even when I'm on every invisible list you have. Yes, that's resentment you hear. Even my real-life stalkers weren't that annoying. Creepier, yes, but less annoying. Fun stalkers get free drinks from their stalkees!

Before I left I gave them directions to Kun Kei, this super-dirty wanton noodles shop with delicious food. I also told them where the nearest pharmacy store is cause they could hardly handle the food court meals, so they'll need their stomach medication

Hmm...so yes....Kinda reminds me of when I told my father off for thinking I befriend strangers all the time. Hmmmm.

'Hey dad, you're right, I do talk to strangers, I even accepted a drink from them and look look! I haven't been drugged and raped, so is it okay if I do it again?'

Nah, I think he can live without knowing.

Written by lainie at 09:32 PM on November 22, 2003.

I am...going...to...do. something. very. illegal. if. this. six. year. old. boy. is....not. taken. far. far. away. from. me.

I don't like kids. I especially don't like kids who refuse to learn how to read, and then keep pointing at the computer and yelling pictures! pictures! when there's nothing there but the words, which he won't learn cause he's too naughty.

Arghghgh, can't even open my email because my mother sends me the most obscene things on earth (yes, of all my dirty minded friends, only my MOM sends me porno jokes and pictures. my life is unbelievably uber-cool).

I'm not sure where she gets all the forwarded stuff in the first place, but Natalie, sigh...I hate to break it to you I think it has something to do with your mom. Wait. Nat, are you and Krystal sending her all those stuff??

ARGHGHGHGH HE JUST CALLED WHAT I TYPED A PICTURE!! GYAHHHHH!!

kids. drive. me. fucking. bonking. nuts. Especially. THIS *points*. ONE.

*waves hands in fly-swatting motions frantically in front of head out of extreme annoyance*

I'm one of the girls who probably bashed up her biological clock (if any at all) cause it rang too early in the morning....ARGHGHGHG THIS IS NOT A PICTURE!! ARGHGHGHGHGH!!!

.......wait........

I think he just likes annoying me.....? ? ???

ARRRGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGH!!!
.

Written by lainie at 12:31 PM on November 23, 2003.

[Warning : Ultra Geekiness Ahead]

WHOOOOOOOOOO!!! I am listed No.2 on Google for the searchword Lainie!

I used to be around 9 - 11, till I changed the title and included my name in it like so Lainie > I.Didn't.Do.That! then waited for the next time Google crawled the net.

And now I'm num-bah 2! Move it, Lainie Kazan, it's a matter of time before I take over!

WHOOOOOOOOO!!!

Written by lainie at 09:03 PM on November 23, 2003.

Well, I just coloured my hair again today, and got my nails done a nice dark kinda plum / red vampy colour. My hair is now red and brown

Basically I sat in the chair, told the girl to do whatever she wants, colour it whatever she thought would look nice. So she gave me a shoulder length cut with annoying flippy fringe, and coloured it for me (I told her anything was fine but blonde).

Also went shopping at Debenhams with my aunt, and I racked up enough purchases to get 3 free umbrellas, but we only took two, cause what the hell are the both of us gonna do with so many right? Surprisingly they had some party type clothes there, was not the old-ladies 'dorothy perkins' type of departmental store I was expecting.

Sigh. I can hardly wait to tell my father I'll need him to fill up my bank account a bit earlier than expected again. Oh well, I cost less than Gazel, since she decided to take off to Gold Coast for a holiday, so I guess he can't say much *punches fist in air - HUZZAH!*

Anyway, it was all kinda like much needed retail therapy.
First off, my dog Belle got hit-and run by a car. Yes, she was on a leash. Yes, driver is a dickless asshole who should die miserable death. My aunt was walking her. Thankfully, I slept through all the commotion worried aunt and uncle caused.

I don't handle doggies in pain well. At all.

Anyways, Belle is in the vet, hopefully she doesn't have to be put to sleep, it all depends on whether her hip is gonna be alright or not *crosses fingers and hopes for the best*

Then my good friend Gwen who's supposed to give me a ride back to Ipoh today didn't call, and I've been trying to get through to her phone for ages but couldn't. I'm just worried for her too (because heck, if I'm already worrying for Belle, yknow, 2 birds, 1 stone) cause it's not like her to turn off her cellphone.

So two people (okay, 1 _dog_, 1 friend) to wish well to.

See why I needed the new clothes, manicure and hair pampering?
Oooooh, and guess what I found? A special edition of Mad magazine, Mad aobut the 60s- I am dead happy about that! :D

Written by lainie at 09:36 PM on November 23, 2003.

51 questions

1. Pierce your nose or tongue?
nope...my dad might freak

2. Be serious or be funny?
depends, doesn't it? not like i laugh at funerals

3. Boxers or briefs?
boxers

4. Whole or skim milk?
whole...i can't take skim

5. Single or Taken?
single; but not available :D

6. Simple or complicated?
simple

7. Law or anarchy?
law. i'd be dead by now otherwise.

8. Flowers or angels?
wtf? oh, angels i suppose *rolls eyes*

9. Grey or gray?
grey, i'm msian, we don't use American English here

10. Read or write?
read

11. Color or black-and-white photos?
b & w is charming isn't it? or sepia tones

12. Sunrise or sunset?
sunset

13. M&M's or Skittles?
m&ms..never make the mistake of offering me skittles

14. Rap or rock?
rock

15. Stay up late or wake up late?
both that was easy.

16. TV or Radio?
tv

17. Is it POP or SODA?
soda

18. X or O in Tic-tac-toe?
x

20. Eat an apple or an orange?
neither. but apple juice over orange anytime! (i hate OJ)

21. What came first the chicken or the egg?
mutated chicken, started laying eggs.

22. Hot or Cold?
cold

24. Tall members of the opposite sex or short?
tall.

25. Sun or moon?
moon

26. Emerald or ruby?
emerald. no, ruby. no, emerald. change the question. we'd be here all day otherwise.

28. Left or right?
right

29. 10 acquaintances or 1 best friend?
wtf? stupid question that will never apply in real life.

30. Vanilla ice cream or chocolate ice cream?
chocolate

31. High or Drunk?
both together, haha :D

32. Green beans or carrots?
oooh...oooh....*looks round furtively*....argghg.....(doesn't take much to confuse my lil mind huh?)

33. Low fat or fat free?
whichever

34. What is your biggest fear in the world?
i'm very avoidant, therefore no idea.

36. Kids or no kids?
i.hate.kids.

37. Cat or dog?
dogs.

38. Half empty or half full?
wrong cup.

39. Mustard or ketchup?
mustard have never developed taste for ketchup. Singular achievement in this country.

40. Hard cover books or soft cover books?
erm.....paperbacks. did an american write this? why's the lingo all different??

41. Newspaper or magazine?
magazines

42. Sandals or sneakers?
sandals

43. Wonder or amazement?
sigh.

44. Red car or white car?
white.

45. Happy and poor or sad and rich?
happy and rich. get real, like i'd pick anything else. if I was happy, i'd work at earning more, if I was sad i'd go for therapy, make new friends.

46. Singing or dancing?
dancing. i'm a scary singer.

47. Hugging or Kissing?
both. i don't like this questionnaire.

48. Corduroy or plaid?
omfg....no way

49. Happy or sad?
happy. i've had enough of moping around to last me the next few centuries.

50. Purple or green?
purple *looks at manicure* yeap, purple.

51. A year of hot sex or a lifetime of
friendship?
what happens after a year????? again, very non-applicable question.
.

Written by lainie at 11:27 PM on November 23, 2003.

Questionnaires. The lazy girl's way of blogging.

The Perfect Guy
1. Hair color - ...either bald or something like red tends to catch my attention (but that's the whole idea isn't it?)

2. Eye color - who cares, as long as they're both there.

3. Height - i like tall guys...I'm the 3rd shortest in my family, i'm used to being surrounded by tall people. I'm five feet five (++) hehe

4. Six pack - yes please :D

5. Long or short hair - long, but only if they can carry it off...the skinny chinese guys walking around with long hair that look like dead rats, you wouldn't believe *shakes head*

6. Glasses - i don't mind (i'm practically blind so yeah)

7. Piercings - *fans self* oh yes....

8. Scars - who cares?

9. Eyebrows - eyebrowS is the key here...I can't stand monobrows.

10. Big butt or little - ....in between? hahaha

11. Chest hair - *shudder* (i knew a really hairy guy once, he's just turned me off body hair forever....even his ears were hairy *brr*)

12. Buff or skinny- buff...sigh...i'm as shallow as a rain puddle.

13. Straight teeth, gap, or braces - is this question for real? wtf??

14. Funny or serious - i only get along with people capable of both.

15. Party or stay at home - both

16. Should he cook or bake- depends what he's baking. I can't even fry an egg, so hopefully he cooks too! who cares anyway

17. Should he have a best friend - why not? i can't devote all my time to him

18. Should he have a lotta girlfriends - yeah, at least he'll know how to act round a girl

19. Outgoing or shy - Outgoing.. how the heck am i gonna meet someone shy?

20. Sarcastic or sincere - sincere. I have enough sarcasm for three people.

21. Should he love his mother - I couldn't even give a fuck, that's his problem.

22. Should he watch chick flicks - well, he'll end up being dragged for em, so yeah.

23. Would he be a smoker - would i give a shit? would i? :D

24. Would he drink - yeah, and he'd better be a good one too, cause I'm a damned cheap drunk.

25. would he swear - more than me? not many people do.

26. would he play with your hair - go ahead *leans over*

27. One or more girls at a time - hmm.......if it's get me out of committing, he can do whatever the hell he wants :D

28. Would he pay for dates - if i'm broke, someone's gotta

29.Does he kiss on the first date - if not?

30. Where would you go to dinner - wherever he feels like, i'm indecisive.

31. Would he bring you flowers - oh god, i'm not really into guys like that.

32. Would he lay under the stars with you?- i'm more of a 'watch thunderstorms' type of girl.

33. Would he write poetry about you - and post it in his website and deviantart

34. Would he call you hunny, sweetie, or baby - i can't even stop my friends from calling me stuff like that. Hmm..i call em stuff like that too. Habitual.

35. Would he hang out with you and YOUR friends? - yeap.

36. Would you hang out with him and HIS friends? - oh no, we're going to be hermits for the rest of our 2 weeks long (max) relationship. of course i will what the fuck type of question is that?

37. Will he walk you to the door at the end? - i don't care but if it's dark he'd better make sure I'm home safe before driving off.

38. Holding hands - each others? silly question.

47. Sing - *melts*

48. Play guitar - *double melts*

49. Play piano - .....*raises eyebrow* if he wants to, and knows some jazz :D

50. Play drums- they're okay....my dad is a drummer (i'm not sure what the connection is, or how I feel about it, but it's there)

52. Paint, draw, sculpt - *handcuffs said guy to myself*

53. Writes his own music - *triple melts* goes shopping for wedding ring. sex toys. babies.

54. Use the word dude - dude....no one can do the hawaiian// finding nemo turtle duuuude better than me among my friends

55. Use the word tight - sigh..if he must

56. Would he watch the sun rise with you - he'd be up alone, cause goddamn if i'm gonna wake up that fucking early.

57. What kind of car does he drive- one that works? i don't care

58. How old is he - don't know? above 19?

59. What would his name be - *coughhackcoughcoughchoke* I just said it, but I guess you must have missed it...ahh well then.

Yeah i know that's a lotta questionnaires gimme a break, my dog just got run over by a car.
.

Written by lainie at 01:51 AM on November 24, 2003.

Third and last questionnaire for today/ this week, don't worry, even I am tired of myself by now
Got this off Medea

Five details about your appearance right now.

[x] Geeky science t-shirt
[x] red-brown hair
[x] bleary eyes
[x] birkenstocks
[x] vampy nail polish


Five things you did today.

[x] found out dog got hit by car
[x] shopped too much
[x] coloured hair.
[x] read people's blogs (i'm such a blogwhore)
[x] stalked.

Five groups/artists you listened to today.

[x] black eyed peas
[x] the darkness
[x] beth orton
[x] guns n roses
[x] bon jovi -their old stuff :D

Five things that make you happy.

[x] reading funnies
[x] friends (corny, yet true *nods*)
[x] new harry potter books (geek factor kicking in)
[x] simple, but nice, home-cooked food
[x] hotornot.com my my, such nice looking guys there :D

Five things that disgust you.

[x] stupidity
[x] dog drool
[x] my mom's lunch. she blends papaya, wheat germ, oats, milk, bran and (even more) healthy stuff into this orange gucky drink. And she likes it. Bleurgh....
[x] inconsiderate ppl who hit and run dogs.
[x] those mp3s I download that have been rigged.

Five things you can't live without.

[x] spiritually? communication.
[x] acceptance
[x] reason
[x] happiness
[x] humour


Five things you'll do when you complete this.

[x] read the Illiad before I sleep
[x] sms some friends to say goodnight
[x] post this, blogwhore.
[x] get ready for bed.
[x] i dunno...scratch my bum, dream, wateva

Five things you feel right now.

[x] sleepy...i haven't been sleeping much
[x] heady - the fumes the hair dye is giving off is killin me
[x] contentment, which didn't use to come so easily
[x] horny...damn...i gotta stop lookin at guys in hotornot.com
[x] quiet...my lips feel stuck together..


name = Lainie
tattoos = one, hopefully more to come
height= almost 5 feet 6 inches
natural hair color = brunette
siblings = Gazel. my total opposite.
single or taken? single. *so* not available for committed relationships.

LAST...
movie you rented = i buy, not rent/
movie you bought = hollywood homicide
song you listened to = bon jovi -livin on a prayer
song that was stuck in your head = little cockroach song la cucaracha
cd you bought = Black eyed peas, Elephunk, and Beth Orton, Daybreak
cd you listened to = Classic Rock Songs
person you've called = Gwen
person that you wanted a phone call from = Gwen
tv show you've watched = Just Shoot Me
person you were thinking of = .....that hot six-pack guy on the internet, why? :D

DO...
you have a crush on someone = yeah....no...yeah...no....i don't know
you wish you could live somewhere else = not really...i adapt well
others find you attractive = ask them
you like cleaning = i'm not messy, i'm creative
you write in cursive or print = both, and more..i have a lotta different handwritings.

FOR OR AGAINST...

long distance relationships = generally against.
using someone = for - I never said I'm nice
suicide = for - some people just need to do the world a favour and off themselves.
killing people = for. some people need help in making the world a better place.
teenage smoking = let them do what they want.
driving drunk = against. I've been in cars with drunk drivers too many times. it's very scary, not that I realised at that time since I was drunk outta my mind too.
soap operas = they're evil aren't they? I couldn't stop watching Juana's Miracle...cute actors

NUMBER...
of times I have been in love?= as i said, i was delusional. that don't count.
of times I have had my heart broken? = damn..where's the infinity sign on my keyboard?
of hearts I have broken? = sigh...wish i could say none
of girls I have kissed? = ....
of boys I have kissed? = ....
of people I would classify as true, could trust with my life type friends? = haha..i've answered this question before! more than 10 (yeah, I don't intend to live long anyway)

DO YOU THINK YOU ARE...
pretty - yeah, gorgeous. All bow before me.
funny – no but i am entertaining (not that u could tell from the journal ah well)
hot - *sizzlessss* hahaha...okay, no.
friendly - yes
amusing – stupidity always is.
ugly – oh geez no.
loveable - nah.
caring - definitely not!
sincere- not really
sweet - sigh, I'd say yes, but then who'd believe me? Shu? Rano? Lyne? yeah, I didn't think so
dorky – very...I can tell u where Star Wars movies go against the storylines in the books without referring to *any* websites

favorite:

actor/actress: John Malkovich (Dangerous Liaisons)/ Natalie Portman (The Professional)
Candy: i don't like candy. I associate them with dumb people (i don't mean you, of course *fakes a grin*).
Cartoon: quack pack naruto, dragonballZ, yuyu hakusho, akira
Cereal: Post and Quaker....especially the healthy ones
Color(s): red, orange, black, white, brown.
Day of week: I'm on holiday :D i didn't use to have classes on Mondays though...or was it Fridays? I can't remember, I didn't use to go for them :D
Least fave day: None
Flower: casablancas....i suppose
Jello flavor: don't like jello. freaky wobbling lumps of coloured sugar.
coffee/tea? coffee, no contest. I'm a total coffee addict.
sprite/7-up? neither
Summer/Winter: winter
Trampolines or swimming pools: pools


|| Have you ever.. ||

Said "I love you" and meant it?: and meant it?? lalalalalaaaaa
Gone out in public in your pajamas: yeah...even to classes in college and uni. I couldn't be arsed.
Kept a secret from everyone: not everyone, usually at least 2-3 of my friends will know (i have online journals everywhere, for fucks sake, what secrets??)
Cried during a movie: yeah...disney cartoons get me everytime, DAMN THEM
Ever at anytime owned new kids on the block stuff: at least this much pride I can salvage for myself with a nice loud NO! :D
Planned your week based on the TV Guide: sadly, yeah.
Been on stage: yeah
Been to New York: no
Been to California: no
Hawaii: no
China: hell no
Canada: no
Europe: no
Asia: i live here
South America: no
australia: yeah
Wished you were the opposite sex: i think being a girl has way more advantages :D (that means no, dickhead)
What time is it now?: 1.30 in the morning
Apples or bananas?: bananas
Blue or red?: red
Walmart or target?: yo...we have tesco and that's bout it.
Spring or Fall?: Fall
What are you gonna do after you finish this?: bum scratch.
What was the last meal you ate?: my dinenr
High school or college?: i liked both made friends in both
Last noise you heard?: sound of dog Buster landing on my lap. This golden retriever thinks he's a bloody lapdog....Gerrof Buster....I need some blood to reach my feet....Geez...he's lonely cause Belle is at the vet
Last smell you sniffed?: Buster. My hair dye. Both getting me heady.
Last time you went out of state/province?: 2 days ago. I do this a lot.

|| Friendship/Love ||

Do you believe in love at first sight?: why not

do you believe in love? ...trick question?? yeah i do

who do you want to cuddle with? my my, mass orgy with the guys I rated 9 and 10 in hotornot.com, fuck cuddling. I want those guys in my bed, well-oiled and naked. NOW.

kiss? gee, guess.

who makes you laugh? among my friends? haha...here goes, risha, rach, deb, rano, lyne, gwen, prits, al, tee, jose, julia, lena oh and whoever :D as I've said before, I have good friends.

who do you miss? my hamsters...Gwen's taking care of them for me, so they're hers now...oh right who. My friends who I don't see as much of cause they're overseas (thank god for the internet)

Do you want children one day & if so, how many?: I can't count how mant people have told me not to have kids after they hear my sadistic plans to torture them for my own amusement.



So yes, I've been distracting myself from thinking too much with these questionnaires. Now it's time for me to light up some joysticks for my ancestors (I'm not religious, but they were I guess, so this is for them), and crawl into my soft, waiting bed.

I know I act kinda mean, and I definitely drive crazy, but I like to think of myself as someone who wouldn't hit a dog while driving, much less run away like a heartless coward after that. I don't understand people who are mean to animals.

But something good did happen. My neighbour here in KL just bought a puppy from a woman in the market cause she was about to sell it to a man who wanted to eat it. Jolly decent of my neighbour huh? The puppy will have a good home here, so I'm glad for it.

When people say they eat dogs, they really mean they eat puppies (cause the meat is more tender or whatever, I don't really want to know), and I cannot comprehend clubbing a puppy's head in (which is how the puppy is killed for cooking).

Right now as far a I'm concerned: All dog eaters are fuckers Anyone has a differing opinion?
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Written by lainie at 01:09 PM on November 24, 2003.

You know, it really says a lot about me when I have a small list of friends on my Friendster profile as Lainie, and easily twice the size of that for my more anonymous online persona Friendster list.

You'd think I socialise a lot more on the internet than I do real life *whistles, kicks pebble*

What's truly amazing though, is that in real life some of these people hate me. I mean, they really, really hate me. They probably spit at my name. If they could do it, and get away with me not hunting them down and scalping them, they would hit me. And yet, there I am, in the Friendster list, testimonials and all.

How ironic. And they hate me solely because of the people I choose to have as my friends. That's the most stupid part of all. Guilty by association.

Sigh...Think I'll go laugh at their sweet testimonials about what a fantastic person I am. I am such a sadistic sicko sometimes.
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Written by lainie at 01:25 PM on November 24, 2003.

WHOOOOO....found this fun club song I used to listen to haha


Baby bounce them tits
Mama move them hips
Baby shake them cheeks
I got dick for days
You got ass for weeks, yeah, yeah

[Ms. Toi]
You can do it put your back into it
[Ice Cube]
I can do it put your ass into it
[Ms. Toi]
You can do it put your back into it
[Ice Cube]
I can do it put your ass into it
[Ms. Toi]
Put your back into it
[Ice Cube]
Put your ass into it

Oh yeahhhhh, super assy songs, I like :D

Written by lainie at 12:50 AM on November 25, 2003.

Whew am I tired :D

Had a very harrowing experience just trying to get home...Rain drizzled on my head for 40 minutes because the bus was late, and I couldn't get a proper place to stand.

I wanted to poke people with my umbrella, but I was busy pretending it's an effective brolly by holding it above my head. You'd think I forgot to jack it up, the rate rain was happily plopping on my head anyway

So I'm this grumpy girl in the rain waiting for a bus to take me back to Ipoh, the most boring place I could possibly go to. The bus comes. Now you see, I payed for a single seat in a VIP bus (it's just a few bucks more) so I guess it was reasonable to expect just that.

With my arse luck, I got ripped off. I got some ratty looking coach that's really cramped. Double seats. I was so pissed off by then I sent my mom an sms saying that if someone fat, or smelly, sat next to me I was going to lose my temper. Royally. Some others were ripped off too, they cursed the family so much I think my life span just got a few years knocked off.

Luckily no one parked their ass next to mine.

But wait, let me tell you about the wonderful old couple sitting in front of me. They eat smelly prawn crackers in air-conditioned buses. They smell like milk powder. And then, here comes the crown on this beauty.

We pull up for a rest stop, and what happens? These old people are among the last to leave. As old woman gets up, big wad of fifty dollar notes fall out. Oh my stars.

I sat for ages holding the money (man, do old women take a long time to pee) thinking to myself digital camera, complete set of Books of Magic comics, new deck of tarot cards, CDs and so many other things.

Then I noticed them coming back up the bus. Put the money in your pocket, now! now! now! DIGICAAAAM!! Sigh...I handed the money back to her before she sat down. And spent the rest of the bus journey home mentally giving myself ass-kicks.

I hate being stupid. I really hate being stupid. Excuse me, I need to go bandage my ass now.
I don't know how I attract situations like this.
*sniff sniff*......digicam.....*sniff sniff*......books of magic *sniff*
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Written by lainie at 06:07 PM on November 25, 2003.

My dog in Ipoh is a total attention whore.

She flops over in front of you while you try to walk or watch tv for a lil 20 minute tummy rub. For good measure that you don't ignore her, she makes sure she flops on your feet like a dead weight.

Try walking by her without a pat on her head (and a 20 minute tummy rub) and you'll find walking is indeed a fine art, especially with Mon scurrying around your feet. That's right, my dog doesn't run, scamper or walk. She scurries. Around your ankles and between each foot step, she is lovingly there. Between each step on the staircase, there she is.

She sneaks into the house through the kitchen door, past my mother's radar, by crawling in commando style on her belly, breaks for a fast run upstairs and jumps then lands on my stomach like the tiny, lightweight, lapdog she is not.

She whines, jumps, scratches like a cat (no pride, her), gives puppy-dog guilt-inducing eye stares and parades herself in front of anyone.

My friends have taken to pointing out that dogs behave like their owners. Why the indignity of it all. How dare they.
.

Written by lainie at 11:19 PM on November 25, 2003.

Babycakes is a comic based on Neil Gaiman's writings.

I suggest you read it.
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Written by lainie at 01:07 AM on November 26, 2003.

0_o
No one's gonna read this ma-long, long, questionnaire, I know, but it's a good way to spend time

What do you wish was your name?
...I like my name...would be cool if my family name was Gates though...and I inherited it off a certain Microsoft inventor....hmm

What song seems to reflect you the most?
Right now, Sweetbox, Everything's gonna be alright or Blind Melon's No rain

If you had to have a picture be your symbol, what would it be and why?
I'm already using it Picture of what stuff looks like when high on mushrooms, just cause it's fun.

What would you title the movie or soundtrack of your life?: Slained.

What are you most dissapointed with so far?:
Oh here and there...Not everything turns out the way I expect, and I'm learning still...

What is a major turn on?
intelligence...or rather, a very well-rounded guy who knows a bit about everything...and musicians and artists.

What confuses you the most about life?: people, honey, people.

Which matters more, people's words or actions?Why?
actions. words may hurt sometimes, but actions show.

Does love really make the world go round? Is love present in today's world?
love is present, but it don't make the world go round Say if only humans had love, and we all disappeared right now, the world would still go on wouldn't it?

If you were on a stranded island who would you be with and why?
I'd be with Superman or Tim Hunter, for very obvious reasons.

Do you believe in Internet relationships?
Not really Bad experiences.

Would you rather be told in person, phone, e-mail or some other way that you wanted to break up?
Person, in case I wanna get physical...haha..nah..so I can watch it happen and reanalyse every second for, i dunno, next 10 years of my life.

What is your biggest fear?
I'm not sure what I'm afraid of...but there's always this constant sick-fear feeling in the back of my head.

Would you ever meet anyone off of the Internet?
Already have.

Do you believe in Love at first site?
site? sight? haha...no, i go for the lust reasoning

Do you wish that you could make your dreams come true?
Why else would they be called dreams?

Do you believe that they will come true?
Some of them, I intend to make happen.

Have you ever written a poem? *If so share it please*
I've written loads, no thank you

How are you feeling right now?
A bit sad, my cousins' grandfather just passed away. Nice man.

Can you not wait to talk to the person...even write notes knowing that the person will never see them just because you want to talk to them so bad?
Ummm....I'm really a lot more rational than I look

When you get married do you want it outdoors or inside a church?
Seeing as to how I'm a freethinker.....Presumptious question, wasn't it?

What cologne or perfume do you best like on a guy/girl?
I don't. I'm sensitive to them :/

What is your biggest dream that you want to come true? *Truthfully*
Being happy and artsy. Truthfully. Hey, I'm boring can't help it!

Name some people that mean so much to you that you wouldn't know what to do if you lost them?
Questions like these make my head hurt....Okay...if anything happens to my cousin, deb, i probably won't take it well, at all.

do you type really fast?
yeah

does it annoy people who are around you (like in the library)?
no...they like to stare

do you/did you like high school?
yeap, very good and interesting memories there

how old are you?
biologically, twenty. mentally, eleven.

do you know anyone who has the same birthday as you? if so name them
enrique iglesias, darren hayes

what word do you constantly misspell when typing?
i mix up the f and g letters a lot

do you have trees in your yard? -
yeah. mom makes the gardener trim em all the time though.

name one director you hate and tell why
erm...there's this local director I think is an absolutely untalented twat...everything he's written or directed that I watched has sucked major ass...but i dont think it's the best idea to name him here.

tell me about the weirdest pair of socks you own
ducks in obscene positions.

if you woke up tomorrow morning as the opposite sex, what would you do first?
try and wake up again. find out if I was a hallucinating boy all along, or if I've become a hallucinating girl with some serious issues to sort out.

ever finished reading a complete set of encyclopedia?
umm..i don't read them much anymore, just readers digest special edition stuff...read a couple as a kid though
here goes...complete set of Young Children's Encyclopedia, Disney Around the world Encyclopedia (i think that's the name?), complete set of encyclopedia britannica, the new complete medical and health encyclopedia set, umm...lotsa science ones, Dorsley mainly....Readers Digest stuff, and a few more can't remember. yes, i was a very, very, bored and nerdy kid.

do you tan or burn easily?
I burn easily, but I don't tan that well

if you could make one celebrity magically disappear, who would it be?
goodbye, george bush *pooOOoooOoof*. (well, he is a celebrity of sorts)

how is life treating you?
it's getting nicer and nicer to me, as I treat it better.

do people like you?
only the ones who are used to me...others probably find me too sarcastic / blunt.

what do you think it is that makes the "popular" people popular?
collective stupidity of worshipping masses.

are you going to live forever or die soon?
die soon. I'm pissing too many people off.

how fast can you run?
run? me? don't be silly.

have you ever taught a little kid a curse word?
i accidentally taught Zen how to say molest...

if so which one was it?
molest oh and balls.

do you think little boys are horrendously ill behaved?
not when my aunt is their mother.

have you ever thrown anything at a moving car? if so, what?
eggs. lotsa eggs.

what do you say when you stub your toe off of the corner of the coffee table?
FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK

what's the highest thing you've ever jumped off of and landed unharmed?
balcony of my house.

ever had a hot teacher?
oh yes....my econs teacher, Chris...fresh grad, quite cute

if yes, did you flirt with him/her?
i didn't go to class (it was in the morning. I'm not a morn person)

have you ever egged somebody's house?
ahhh that's an idea! no, just loads of cars

has someone ever egged yours?
nope

have you ever worked in a supermarket?
nah

how about a restaurant?
umm...I typed out the customer list for my aunt who runs House of Sundanese Food here, but that's about it...no waitressing.

if yes, do you agree with me when i say that those are the two worst establishments to work in?
it was cool, i had really great food for ages. mmm....yumm...

what's your opinion of the u.s. retaliation in afghanistan?
mercenary

do you get uneasy when you see a person of a different color than you walking down the same street as you in the middle of the night?
nope....unless they're holding weapons and bearing down on me, time to haul ass isn't it?

if yes, do you think that makes you racist?
i think...it's very hard to classify me as racist.

are you a vegetarian?
not even close.

how about vegan?
damned if i am.

have you ever given up a certain type of food? if so, what was it and why did you do it?
i don't ever wanna eat dogs......Dogs know if you've eaten one of em

spit out a random song lyric for me. make sure you tell me the name of the song and who sings it!
Siva Choy- Why you so like dat

I always give you chocolate, I give you my Tic Tac, but now you got the Kit-Kat, you never give me back.
Ei why you so like dat ah? why you so like that?

who does the chores around your house?
the maid. mom cooks dinner though.

what movie could you watch a million times and never get tired of? -
pulp fiction....i think i've watched it 1,000,000 times

what movie have you watched a million times, and you still laugh at the jokes?
Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back

have you ever hugged a stuffed animal or pillow and pretended that it was your significant other, or someone you had a crush on, and then someone caught you talking to it, and stroking its soft, fuzzy fur, and laughed at you and told the whole school?
man, u had a bad childhood. and no, i haven't.

has anyone ever called you a bitch?
who hasn't?

has anyone ever called you an asshole?
who hasn't?

are you a bitch/asshole?
nope

what's your religion?
i don't have one. my family's v confusin, religion-wise.

do you try to force it on other people?
nope.

do you knock on people's doors at 7 a.m. on saturdays, trying to give them a pamphlet and tell them about the lord, or ask random people at the mall if they’ve been saved, yet you think that doesn’t count as forcing religion, you son of a bitch?
hahaha....the people who do that where I used to stay sorta disappear when I'm around...even those who attack in groups.

have you ever been flipping channels late at night and caught a glimpse of some porn on skinemax?
i'm from malaysia. we censor kissing scenes.

if so, did you watch it? don't say no, i know you did
...

what's the code word or phrase you and your friends use for the word SEX?
fuck?

what is the one thing in the world that just looking at it makes you vomit, or come close to it?
dirty toilets....this fat guy that I used to live with...he didn't use toilet paper, and worse...when he washed.....a lot of it got left behind on the floor........yeah..

when other people vomit, does it make you sick?
no. immune.

what are you wearing right now?
taekwondo pants and red shirt.

have you run away from home before?
yeah.

what’s the weirdest thing you’ve lived next to?
this guy who set our house on fire.

tell me something i don’t know
wright brothers are not the first to make a powered flight. John Stringfellow was.

This question has two versions. For guys: Your wife is in labor with your first child, but it has come to the point where it is dangerous for them both to live and you have to choose which one to save. Who would it be? For girls: Who would you have him choose?
He'd better damn well choose ME that jackass....as if there need be consideration. Babies can be made again.

Written by lainie at 05:44 PM on November 26, 2003.

Ooooh if there's one thing I exercise asides from my right to say whatever the hell I want (at home anyway), it's my fingers.

They're gonna drop off soon, I've just finished typing out 6 long individual emails to my friends.....It's actually taking a lot more effort than I ever realised to keep in touch with my friends.

See, my friends (most of them) don't like to come online much, and therefore do not visit my journal. Most of them don't even like to read. Not good combination. Ahhh well, at least they read emails.

The thing about growing older is that more and more of your friends leave the country -Ireland, London, Ukraine, India, Australia, New Zealand......they're not really a phone call away (I'm not that cruel to my parent's bank accounts, and I'm sure they don't love me that much).

Of course, this means that I have to type out a lot of emails, just to tell them what's up. I can't forward the same email to everyone, cause first of all, I'm pretty sure personal emails are better appreciated, and secondly - I need to reply their emails too, so privacy really wouldn't apply would it if I did that?

Then I come online and blogwhore like crazy 0_o
I'm just surprised my fingers aren't little bundles of Schwarzenegger muscles.

But heck, now's the time to relax, and the only time I'm gonna move my fingers will be to push the buttons on the remote, or to move Twisties from bowl to lips. American Pie 3, here I come! YEAHHHH!!
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Written by lainie at 05:56 PM on November 26, 2003.

You're just the happy go-lucky type. You might have your pet peeves, but other than that, you're mainly calm. Blending in with your surroundings, you're the type of person who everyone likes. Usually it's you who cracks jokes at social gatherings - after all, laughter is the best medicine. Sometimes you pretend to be stupid, but in all actuality, you could be the next Einstein.


What Type of Soul Do You Have ?


Sooooo......seeing as to how I'm the next Einstein, who'd like to invest in me? Just send me some cash, and I'd get back to you in a few decades! (Us geniuses need time to get our act together, what with all the dead bodies we electrocuted to life coming after us)
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Written by lainie at 11:05 PM on November 26, 2003.

You know what? I miss Gazel so much since she left for vacation I can't wait for her to come back to Ipoh for some right huggy-sisterly love.

I am in fact, brimming with so much love over how I finally got my ass down to finish my long put aside Photoshop project only to find Photoshop no longer lives in my computer and oh yeah neither does my project that I am just jumping with excitement at the prospect that Gazel is coming home.

What project is lost, you ask? Oh, nothing, just my most elaborate and huge painting I've ever attempted of a traditional dancer in a sari with complicated folds, designs, shadows and patterns on it. The dancers arms, hands, hair and 95% of the sari are done. That's all. Just a few days work combined. Not much.

Monday she's home.

I. Can't. Wait.
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Written by lainie at 01:20 AM on November 27, 2003.

Just reading about how God (the biblical one) contradicts free will of all living beings, including itself (Himself? Herself? Itself?). Here's one of the points brought up:

If God has free will, but never chooses evil, it is immoral because it could have created life in the same way: With free will, but also never choosing evil. Therefore God must be immoral, not all-powerful or not all-knowing. [link]

What was it that I read once....."The darkness is but a precursor to the light, yet every light casts the shadow of its own darkness".

Explanation for stupid people: No good, no evil, and vice versa.
I got it off an X-Men comic. There's education at its best for you *shrug*

.....I'm not religious, but I don't think there can be good without evil. I mean, it'd be good by our definition, but by a world without evil? It'd be normal behaviour, not good per se....because good is relative.

For example, compared to certain friends who shall remain unnamed to protect the innocent and defenseless (namely, me), I am an innocent, feathery, lala-land angel sent from Heaven.
Now note, compared to my sister, I am more inclined towards the image of rotting corpse who just crawled out of Hell and has pieces of singed, black flesh dropping everywhere.

So see? Good, is relative.

Maybe we need the bad to have the good (from the biblical point of view, perhaps? would explain it -i mean, cast away the whole Lucifer and serpent/ apple thingie for a while...or heyyy, yin-yang!).

Or maybe, we only have the bad because we have the good. <-I go for this one.

If we killed off everyone on Earth, and put Mao Tse Tung, Hitler, Jermaine Jackson and Stalin on a lil island, and wipe their slate clean.
Who would be bad, and who would be good? I can tell, cause I have loads of people to compare them with. But can they tell? If their world only comprises of each other -Not likely.

Of course, that's probably cause they'd be busy busting each other's balls, looking for fig leaves to wear and hunting down ants for lunch, but heck.

Obviously, I don't know the bible well...so comments / corrections are welcome.
Ball-busters, go away, I don't have any. Literally, anyway.
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Written by lainie at 07:16 PM on November 27, 2003.

One mother for rent.

For just a few dollars an hour, my mother is all yours for activities that will include taking her shopping in every girly boutique in town, going to hair stylists and shopping (more clothes, shoes and accessories) in Jusco.

Middle- level maintenance required.

Take for social gatherings, shopping (few hours a day, every day) and other girly things (make-up, idle chit chat, gossip) during day time. Feed health food, one cup of coffee.

During night time, put remote control for Astro and video in her hands. Leave by her bedside: 1 cup of tea, two cryptic crosswords, one novel. Bag of potato chips optional. For dinner, preferably feed simple home-cooked food.

Take her. Have a ball. She's looking for a daughter like you.
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Written by lainie at 09:45 PM on November 27, 2003.

Since I'm still mourning the death of Photoshop in my sister Gazel's hands in my computer.....I decided to muck around in an old friend's arms for some comfort....MS Paint...

Damn I remember when I was a kid, I loved this program! Probably where I developed my taste for freestyle mouse painting.

Here's one of the piccies I painted, I miss PS's Blur and Burn features so much *sob sob*....Magic wand! *sniff*.

This was painted to Billy Joel's For The Longest Time and Leave A Tender Moment Alone So yeah, around 10 minutes. The airbrush control is a right bitch sometimes.

Had to finish it quick cause I'm doing this in my mom's room, don't think she appreciates me painting half naked people :D It's part of a bigger picture, but no time! No time! So I crop, and post away.

This is half-based on someone I know. Yeah she's quite hot, damn her. I'm pretty sure I do her no justice.

C&C welcome (that's comments and criticism to u non-DA Elfwood people). Please note blotchiness is mainly due to bitmap-> jpeg conversion, always my bane.

Written by lainie at 03:16 PM on November 28, 2003.

How to freak Lainie out - Chapter 1.

I'm out with my friend when she answers her phone. Here's how the conversation goes:

"Hi!
No no, just out with a girl I know. Yeah. Mmmhmm.
Oh no, she's not coming, yeah.
She's not Christian yet."

0_o hehhh?
what the hell does she mean I'm not Christian yet? I'm not Christian EVER.
I wouldn't dream of lecturing or challenging her about her religion, I don't think it's much to ask that she leaves (the non-existence of) mine alone.

This has to be one of my oldest problems. People have been trying to convert me as far back as I can remember. I've been getting Bible stories since I could read and I'm still getting inspirational books now.

Schoolmates conveniently assumed I'm Catholic / Christian just because I speak English (sadly enough, it's true that most of the people who speak English in my school are either church goers, or Indian).

Then there was one time when the Agama teacher thought it was appropriate to use her students as her personal swarm of minions to spread Islam throughout the school. By telling everyone else their religion was wrong and sacrilegious and that we should all be Muslim. Because only Islam is good, loving, fair and right.

Yeah, guess how that went? The Malay girls avoided me the rest of the year.

Their bad timing I suppose, I was reading up on the faults of the Koran right about then.

My family's pretty open about religion and it shows in that my mother is Taoist, my father is Christian / Buddhist (long, confusin, 'no one else understands' either story), I'm agnostic and Gazel's....well I don't know, she might be a freethinker.

My mother made it a point to tell me when I was a kid that religion is a personal choice, and no one can or should force it on me. Maybe someone should point out that stubbornly, persistently and constantly trying to gently nudge someone into a religion is very close to forcing it down someone's unwilling throat.

I don't mind religious people, do what you want.
Just quit worrying about my eternal soul okay? It'll be alright I'm taking it on a nice lil holiday, preferably Hawaii first, after I die. No worries.
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Written by lainie at 08:51 PM on November 28, 2003.

Aiii...

Someone stop my mother from watching all those annoying Chinese dramas. Please.

I don't know what she gets out of it, everyone of them in the show is an irrational, short-tempered, panties too tight queen. Even the guys.

No wonder it's a drama. If the world was filled with ingratiating idiots like that we'd have had a huge nuclear blow-out years ago.

Then there're the teenagers who in a matter of days will love and understand everything their parents do, including grounding them, unplugging the phone and keeping them from going out, and not telling them their father is the business tycoon who visits once a year because it's for their own good.


Get real, these kids would resent their parents for a nice long time if that happened.

I dunno...maybe I just really dislike these chinese serial dramas. My mother used to watch Kindred Spirit alright. It lasted over a thousand episodes or something. And if always aired during Ally Mcbeal and Buffy.

No teenager should have had to go through that. It's no wonder I hate all these chinese shows now.
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Written by lainie at 09:16 PM on November 28, 2003.

With a roaring 85% of untelligence compared to the average of 60% *nods*

you are a resourceful and sly woman.

Moi? Sly? Nahhh...

Take the test here
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Written by lainie at 11:03 PM on November 28, 2003.

I've decided to do something fun tonight.

I'm gonna re-read all the archives of my favourite webcomic, Something Positive.

Oh yeah, fun.

Nerdy and a bit sad too.

I couldn't be arsed. I like the comic a lot.

I especially identify with Aubrey in the comic below :D

Click on it, it's bigger in the gallery. Taken from here:
http://somethingpositive.net/sp12242001.shtml

Written by lainie at 01:24 PM on November 29, 2003.

Went shopping early in the morning today...Early being before 10am. My eyes feel like golf balls stuck to the back of my head.

Shopped for some jeans, lingerie, pants, nail polish and groceries. Unfortunately, some of them are black so I'd probably have to do this mass-shopping thing again sometime before Chinese New Year.

Aiiiiiieeeee

I just realised something. This is the first time I'm back in my hometown and I'm not squandering my time building a website (this doesn't count) or hanging around malls and going for movies.

At the suggestion of my uncle (he's actually only a year older than I am) I'm reading The International Jew....Very anti-semitic book...I don't know any Jews so it's really irrelevant to me, but yo...

Makes me wonder if there are any books like this one based on the Chinese instead...Time to Google then. Nope, no books, just news archives of, as expected, Indonesian riots and other butcher scenes.

If only they'd just written a book about how much they hate the Chinese instead. Will look into it more when I have the time.

I'm reading International Jew cause I like to read, although I should probably find another online version or get the book from uncle's house, cause the site I'm using right now is a right pain. There's no link that says 'next page' so it's up to me to remember where the hell I left off.

Heyyyy, my journal's overtaken my website in Google listing for 'lainie yeoh'.....how sad :/

ARGHGHG THE NERVE!! Let me explain what just happened. I like house lizards. I feed one particularly friendly one that comes visit the computer when it hears me typing. Rice, chips, peanut pieces, chikin, anything goes, you know? It's a right greedy bugger.

I dropped a bit of corn beef on the table just now cause I saw it approaching (forked tail, easy to recognise), and it made such a violent grab for it a small piece of the corn beef flew off and almost hit me in the eye. Bad Lizard! No more beef!

Probably off on an ego trip right now, titchy sized lizard eating part of big fat cow. Getting in touch with it's inner dragon.

My dad wonders why the lizard keeps appearing when he's typing
My mother wonders why there's always bits of rice and other food on the computer table.
Me? I know why the house lizard is getting so damned fat.
Why shouldn't I, huh?

Just for kicks, if you're bored, here's a link to one of the articles in TheOnion.com: Girl from record stall

Now if you'll excuse me, I downloaded 6 episodes of Sex and the City last night and I'm off to lala-land with the four of them.
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Written by lainie at 03:08 PM on November 29, 2003.

See the title above?

My father wants to send me for a full hormone check up with the family doctor because I have boobs.

Because it is not normal for any of his daughters to grow boobs.

Apparently, he's under the impression I couldn't possibly have inherited them off him.

Are you thinking: 'What the fuck???' cause I am.

Can someone please point out to my father that girls in general do tend to grow tits, and that fathers in general tend to not have any?

Sigh....this confirms it. My father is a Himbo.
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Written by lainie at 04:00 PM on November 29, 2003.

Actor Jonathan Brandis is dead, and that sorta sucks. [link]

Used to really love him when I was young. Seaquest, Neverending Story2, Ladybugs, all the crappy movies I wouldn't have watched had he not been in them.

I watched It just because of his role there. Till today I'm still scared of clowns thanks to that movie.

I still have some of his posters on my wall (I'm lazy never got round to changing them)...I think I'll leave em there
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Written by lainie at 01:14 AM on November 30, 2003.

You said your birthday is 5 / 8 / 1983
which means you are 20 years old and about:

56 years 11 months younger than Andy Griffith, age 77
53 years 5 months younger than Dick Clark, age 74
52 years 1 month younger than Leonard Nimoy, age 72
50 years 0 months younger than Carol Burnett, age 70
47 years 3 months younger than Alan Alda, age 67
45 years 10 months younger than Bill Cosby, age 66
40 years 6 months younger than Linda Evans, age 61
38 years 3 months younger than Tom Selleck, age 58
35 years 4 months younger than Ted Danson, age 55
33 years 0 months younger than Jay Leno, age 53
29 years 3 months younger than Oprah Winfrey, age 49
28 years 3 months younger than Kelsey Grammer, age 48
25 years 0 months younger than Drew Carey, age 45
21 years 11 months younger than Michael J. Fox, age 42
18 years 6 months younger than Calista Flockhart, age 39
14 years 3 months younger than Jennifer Aniston, age 34
10 years 5 months younger than Alyssa Milano, age 30
5 years 5 months younger than Colin Hanks, age 26
0 years 3 months older than Mila Kunis, age 20
8 years 2 months older than Madylin Sweeten, age 12

66 years 6 months younger than Walter Cronkite, age 86
63 years 0 months younger than Pope John Paul II, age 82
58 years 11 months younger than George Herbert Bush, age 78
51 years 7 months younger than Barbara Walters, age 71
49 years 6 months younger than Larry King, age 69
43 years 3 months younger than Ted Koppel, age 63
39 years 10 months younger than Geraldo Rivera, age 59
36 years 10 months younger than George W. Bush, age 56
31 years 10 months younger than Jesse Ventura, age 51
27 years 6 months younger than Bill Gates, age 47
22 years 8 months younger than Cal Ripken Jr., age 42
16 years 10 months younger than Mike Tyson, age 36
12 years 9 months younger than Jennifer Lopez, age 32
7 years 4 months younger than Tiger Woods, age 27
0 years 11 months younger than Prince William, age 20

50 years 3 months younger than Yoko Ono, age 70
41 years 11 months younger than Bob Dylan, age 62
39 years 9 months younger than Mick Jagger, age 60
38 years 1 month younger than Eric Clapton, age 58
34 years 11 months younger than Stevie Nicks, age 55
27 years 7 months younger than David Lee Roth, age 48
24 years 9 months younger than Madonna, age 45
21 years 2 months younger than Jon Bon Jovi, age 41
16 years 2 months younger than Billy Corgan, age 36
13 years 1 month younger than Mariah Carey, age 33
8 years 11 months younger than Alanis Morissette, age 29
1 year 5 months younger than Britney Spears, age 21

64 years 3 months younger than Zsa Zsa Gabor, age 84
52 years 11 months younger than Clint Eastwood, age 73
50 years 3 months younger than Kim Novak, age 70
47 years 3 months younger than Burt Reynolds, age 67
43 years 3 months younger than Nick Nolte, age 63
42 years 0 months younger than Ann-Margret, age 62
36 years 2 months younger than Billy Crystal, age 56
33 years 6 months younger than Whoopi Goldberg, age 54
30 years 10 months younger than Robin Williams, age 51
26 years 10 months younger than Tom Hanks, age 47
24 years 6 months younger than Jamie Lee Curtis, age 45
22 years 1 month younger than Eddie Murphy, age 42
12 years 9 months younger than Jennifer Lopez, age 33
4 years 3 months younger than Jennifer Love Hewitt, age 24
4 years 11 months older than Haley Joel Osment, age 15

..........

and that you were:
3 years old when L.A. Law was first aired on TV
3 years old at the time the series Married with Children began
7 years old when Seinfeld was first televised
8 years old in the month Home Improvement began
11 years old at the time the TV series Friends began
13 years old when Everybody Loves Raymond first aired
16 years old when Who Wants To Be A Millionaire began in the US

This also means you were:
18 years old at the time of the 9-11 attack on America
16 years old on the first day of Y2K
14 years old when Princess Diana was killed in a car crash
11 years old at the time of Oklahoma City bombing
11 years old when O. J. Simpson was charged with murder
9 years old at the time of the 93 bombing of the World Trade Center
7 years old when Operation Desert Storm began
6 years old during the fall of the Berlin Wall
2 years old when the space shuttle Challenger exploded
not yet 1 year old when Apple introduced the Macintosh
not yet 1 year old during Sally Ride's travel in space

and when these songs were topping the charts
and these events occurred your age was:

The recording of We Are The World: 1
Walk Like an Egyptian, Bangles: 3
Didn't We Almost have it all, Whitney Houston: 4
Back In The U.S.S.R. is released exclusively in Russia: 5
Nothing Compares 2 U, Sinead O'Connor: 6
Emotions, Mariah Carey: 8
Fleetwood Mac perform at Bill Clinton's inauguration: 9
The Sign, Ace Of Base: 10
The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and Museum opens: 12

and when these movies were released in the U.S. your age was:
The Terminator: 1
Top Gun: 3
Planes, Trains & Automobiles: 4
Steel Magnolias: 6
Home Alone: 7
Wayne's World: 8
Jurassic Park: 10
Forrest Gump: 11
Fargo: 12
Saving Private Ryan: 15
Toy Story 2: 16

Lotta numbers huh? Pretty cool though, you can try out 4 different versions of the Age gauge
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Written by lainie at 01:47 AM on November 30, 2003.

I downloaded a new wallpaper

It's a surprise for my father.

Oh I suggest you check it out in my gallery, it's the photo at the bottom.

It should be easy enough to spot anyway.

People who have no idea what I'm talking about, check out 3 entried below, titled Tits / Hormones / Imbecile Father
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Written by lainie at 02:10 PM on November 30, 2003.

Mom: When you're done with your lunch get off the internet and type out some lists for the wedding

Lainie: Okay. *slowly nibbles a spiral off her pasta*

I can be a very slow eater when I want to be. Especially when I'm sleepy since I'm one of those people who can't really eat when sleepy *nibbles another spiral off same piece of pasta*

But why would I be sleepy at lunch time? Because I slept at 8 this morning and mother dearest woke me up at 1. Not to have lunch, mind, but because this list, which will only be used tomorrow, simply must be typed before the afternoon is through.

Mom: You need to finish this in the afternoon
Lainie: Why? We're only using it tomorrow! *heads back to bed*
Mom: Don't go back to sleep! Just type it out now!
Lainie: That doesn't make sense! *rubs fast becoming puffy eyes*

After some lil debate whereby it was decided the person who doles out my allowance is always right, I brushed my teeth, washed my face, came to the computer and what do I get?

My mother, playing games on the computer. That's how I ended up with lunch, I had nothing else to do. Finally she got off the comp, and here I am *nibbles another spiral off 'yes still the same' pasta*.




*looks at the current world's population* You must have a lot of frustration then.

What pisses you off?

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Written by lainie at 04:29 PM on November 30, 2003.

I guess I'll have to wear high heels to my cousin's wedding (actually, guess-scmuess I know I will).

So I put on a pair to test out my ankle. For those who don't know, my ankle's been through a lot of abuse lately, I sprained it twice in less than a week a while back.

I was worried I'd feel a twinge in my ankle cause it's been a bit fragile lately. I was wrong. I wasn't no lil twinge I felt, that right there was definitely pain.

I guess I'll have to go see a doctor. Problem is who? My mom is either related or friends with most of the doctors I know. And that's the ankle with a tattoo directly above it

Ahh well...Guess I can't put it off for long then. I should go now, but hmmm....I guess I'll watch some movies I bought (Try 17, Monsoon Wedding, Warriors of Heaven and Earth -which I won't understand at all since it's in Mandarin) and the 16 episodes of Sex and The City I downloaded first.
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