Written by lainie at 12:01 AM on January 2, 2006 in Family, Daily Life.

Mmm. What'd I do for New Year's eve? Nothing.

And trust me, I like it that way, mostly. If I can't do something quiet, I very much doubt you can drag me to KLCC to watch the free fireworks because of this equation:


Headache = ( public holidays + national celebrations + fireworks + free entertainment )
x ( assholes out in droves + molestors out for a free feel)
x ( alcohol + drugs) x half of Malaysia at KLCC

So yes. Most New Years, I'd prefer to have something quiet with friends, a dinner maybe, some wine, bit of cam whoring, chit chat. Of course, arse that I am, I have mostly party-party giddyup friends, so I chose to stay at home with my aunt and uncle instead.

I asked Rach today how it went, and as suspected.....they went for the free rave in KLCC and there were a lot of pricks there. Some sleazy guys whipping out their camera phones and videoing my friends, taking their pictures. Also, because Rach is the only one who looks totally Chinese (and she's actually Chindian) because the group is mostly white / mixed, there were the predictable guys making fun of them in Malay - which is stupid because ALL the girls in the group are local.

Too many people, too many assholes. Also, it was a free RAVE and they spotted pregnant women, and children there. Jesus, just cause it's free? And trance music. And oh yeah, Celcom, you have such a TOTALLY RADICALLY COOL IMAGE for making people fill out forms before attending your event. Forms. FORMS.

Right, I'm about to have a totally rocking party time, somebody, give me a pen. *Eyeroll*. Good luck shedding the corporate image, it's gonna take more than the new logo.

======

Owen's Welsh, his language sounds like sing-song elves. But anyhow, I'm well impressed - he ordered his siew ngap fan, said ta pau when the lady asked him sik deng ta pau, understood sam mun, paid it, and said mm goi / to che.

[ I'm not gonna translate - let's just say he can order roast duck rice, to go, in Cantonese ]

And he's Welsh! Not bad huh? I'd learn his language, but it makes me giglge everytime I hear it.

=====

I got my hair cut today. It's about two months overdue. I can barely wait to get back to Ipoh and have my eyebrows threaded.

Damn hairdressers who won't listen to you. I wanted mine a lot shorter but she insisted on giving me shoulder length hair. Four hours later I had this mild irritation that I could still feel my hair on my neck.

I'll see how it grows out next few days, otherwise, I'm chopping it off. I'm on holiday, dammit. And I hate it when hairdressers don't listen.

-=====

Went for a New Year dinner at my uncle's place. The usual set of cousins, roping in new ones, trying to figure out how each was related to the other. So, found two new ones: Eelaine (sp?) and Yvonne.

While Debbie was exchanging names with the rest - she knows a lot of Malaysians in London because she was pretty active in the Malaysian society last year, I zoned out because being from Ipoh and older, what were the chances anyway?

Besides, wasn't that interested.

Then, I heard a name pop up. Zedeck. Which caught my attention because I've only heard of one Zedeck round here. Turns out two of my cousins are his age and from the same school. Way, way wayyyyy to feel old, man.

I said yes, yes I know this guy. His girlfriend's my classmate in Creative Writing. And yes....yes I know this guy........................................

[ What I did not say: He introduced himself to me by emailing me a note to inform me he was gonna stalk me, goddammit. Well, Fip and I broke up now, nothing much to stalk ]

We played Bluff. I'm not used to losing at that game - I only played twice but didn't do that well. I am not used to losing at Bluff *eyetwitch*.

Did not drink any alcohol. Mmmmm, Lainie is turning out into a sober good girl - nice way of saying tired, and feeling old.

=====

I spent most of the afternoon cleaninig up the mess I'd piled up in the computer room during my course. Charming, I know.

I'd wanted to meet up with Daph and Nessa after my family's dinner, but jesus, Daph took so long to reply by the time she did, I was already home, and typed out more than half of this blog entry.

=====

I took before-after photos of my haircut. Unfortunately, since it ended up being more of a trim than a cut, I'm not sure if this is actually a before OR after photo:



But granted, I don't look any much different. Oh, and you can't really see my hair. But you know what? That's all superficial stuff anyway, so it shouldn't matter. Instead, check out how huge my head is. It's true. I have a big head. My only consolation is, big head = big brain.

I'm wasting your time why yes I am. Of course, this blog is NOT a democracy, so I get to do anything I damn well want.

Well, almost.

Written by lainie at 01:03 AM on January 2, 2006 in Rants.

I'm NOT even going to BOTHER to detail EXACTLY how STUPID this is. I don't understand our police force, or whoever is in charge, what the HELL is their AGENDA?

An email with irritating news I got recently:


=====

Greetings and Salutations!

Happy New Year.

Now for something not very festive.

********
Overview
********
Paul's Place was raided on New Years Eve, 31/12/05 at approximately 10:30.
Police were acting on an report that the gig was allegedly a Black Metal
gathering. Bands that performed were, Crystal Lake (Japan), Force Vomit
(Singapore), Cassandra, Second Combat, Devilica, Uphold, The Falling Grudge,
M.U.Z.E, Net Restraint and Crestfallen. It is interesting to note that none
of these bands is a Black Metal band. (Note: I only caught M.U.Z.E's set
which was damn brilliant).

Paul, Ben (Bitches) and I were in Sri Hartamas when the raid occured, we
left about 15 minutes before the raid. Contrary to popular belief neither
Paul nor I were aware that this raid would happen. Paul was filling in on
drums for Triple6Poser.

When we were informed of the raid, we immediately sought legal advisory and
contacted Sonia Randhawa from the Center of Independant Journalism who in
turned brought in HAKAM and SUARAM.

Paul wanted to go to the police station but after getting legal advice and
discussion amongst ourselves, I felt it would be logical for Paul to wait
until the courts open on Tuesday. If he were to go then/now, there is a
possibility that he may be remanded (and rendered useless). I felt it would
be more useful for him to use Sunday and Monday working on a legal strategy
to get the detainees released and organize funds for bail if it becomes
necessary. We told him to go home and headed to the police station.

Ben and I arrived at the police station at about 2am. CK (Ben's Bitches
bassist) arrived shortly after. Friends and loved ones waited outside the
station compound.

Detainees were released at approimately 5pm. David (Paul's Place staff) and
an indeterminate number of others were remanded and shall be brought to
court on Tuesday/Wednesday to face charges.

Some detainees, Crystal Lake included, immediately went back to the police
station and lodged a report on what they believed to be an unlawful
detainment.

Ben and I left the scene at 6:00 am in the morning. CK was still there when
we left.

*******
Details
*******

It is estimated that 380 persons were detained without cause. Those detained
included Paul's Place staff David, members of Japanese band Crystal Lake,
Singaporean outfit Forced Vomit and a lawyer from law firm Edwin Lim & Suren
Advocates and Solicitors. All merchandise and movable equipment at the venue
were confiscated.

It should be noted that not all those detained were physically in Paul's
Place. Some were in the stalls outside eating, hanging out at the kaki lima,
others were there to drop off friends.

Detainees were trucked to the Brickfields Police Station and tested for
drugs. They were made to sit in the compound, men were went single file to
give their urine samples, I assume the women were given a little more
privacy. Friends and loved ones kept vigil outside the police station. No
one was allowed to enter and meet with the detainees until they were
processed.

Those who tested negative for drugs were released at approximately 5:00 am,
I was there until 6:00 am and people were still being released. Some of the
merchandise and equipment was returned to the owners. It is uncertain now
many persons (if any) tested positive and held for a second urine test
and/or remanded.

It is *uncertain* what the detainees were/are being charged for. Detainees
could not get a straight answer from the police. Anedectotal information
includes:

a) Black Metal/Devil Worshipping ceremony (to quote a TV reporter "Menyambut
Tahun Baru dengan Syaitan" - something I wish I had tradmarked)

b) Illegal gathering (for those caught outside).

c) Operating/being in an unlicensed venue for David, organizers Paul's
Place.

d) Undecent public display (I'm assuming wearing black t-shirts)

From what I understand Paul's Place is a licensed cafe. He is allowed to
sell soft drinks and canned/bottled beer and host private events (i.e.,
gigs). The authorities have never seemed to have a problem with this until
now.

HAKAM/SUARAM/CIJ/Media
**********************

Malaysian human rights organizations and watchdog groups HAKAM and SUARAM
and the Center of Independant Journalism were present outside the police
station demanding to speak with the OCPD and questioning the media.

N. Surendran from law firm Edwin Lim & Suren, lodged 3 police reports
against Brickfields OCPD and 2 other high ranking officers within hours of
the raid for the unlawful detainment of their staff lawyer who happened to
be at the gig.

Media, newspapers, TV were present at the police station interviewing
detainees and shooting pictures and footage. Some detainees were "asked
nicely" to provide interviews with the TV journalists. Who were asked
promptly complied.

Some detainees, approximately 15, who were released immediately returned to
the station to lodge a police report against the Brickfields Police
Station's unlawful detainment. Irene (frequent gig organizer and band
nomad), Jay (Freelove) and Hana (Lucy in the Loo) were amongst those who
took a stand and lodged the report.

In addition to that, Crystal Lake members too lodged police reports They had
been advised to bring this matter up to the Japanese Embassy. I'm not sure
if Forced Vomit submitted a report.

A young unidentified off duty cop came up to me and told me, "If I didn't
have to work tonight, I would have probably been at Paul's catching the
hardcore gig and with the detainees right now".

David and some other detainees have been remanded and will be brought to
court to be charged on Tuesday or Wednesday since Sunday and Monday were
public holidays. It will be impossible to contact them, bail them out or
take any legal action until they have been charged.

We are working on a legal strategy to get David and the rest of the
detainees out as soon as they get charged on Tuesday.



Post Mortem and Call for Action
*******************************
Kudos to you all who lodged police reports!

ALL THOSE WHO WERE DETAINED AND RELEASED ARE BEING URGED TO RETURN TO THE
POLICE STATION AND LODGE A POLICE REPORT AND FILE A CLASS ACTION LAW SUIT
AGAINST THE BRICKFIELDS POLICE STATION.

What the police did was unlawful and amounts to harassment. One can't be
detained for listening to music (no matter how bad) or wearing black
t-shirts and having dinner at a gerai.

Failure to take action NOW will allow for the possibility for this to happen
again. I realize it is difficult for some to contemplate lodging a report or
complaint due to several factors; parents, concern that you may be further
persecuted (which won't happen) etc.

If enough people get together, it will be possible to organize a class
action lawsuit. Edwin Lim & Suresh Advocates and Solicitors contact details
below.

I have asked Suren to provide information on how to file a police report and
participate in a class action lawsuit for this matter. I shall post that up
as soon as I get it.

What can you do:
****************

It is important to ensure that incidents like this do not happen again. The
community needs to send a message to the law enforcement agencies and show
that they are not little school kids that can be easily intimidated and
pushed around. They need to show that they are aware of the law and what
their rights as citizens are.

Please do the following:
------------------------

a) If you haven't already: GO BACK AND LODGE A REPORT IF YOU WERE DETAINED.
For those who weren't: get your friends who were involved to return to the
station and lodge a report. Some don't feel comfortable doing so as they
were made to feel they were guilty when the opposite is true. Support them.

b) Go to your MP, DAP complaints bureau and lodge a complaint.

c) File a class action lawsuit. Suren can assist with this. But he needs
LOTS OF YOU TO PARTICIPATE.


CONTACT DETAILS
****************
Edwin Lim & Suren Advocates
****************************
Contact: Suren
Email: edwinlim_suren@yahoo.com
Phone: +60 (3) 2161-7003

Paul Millot
***********
Email: solarcon@tm.net.my
Phone: +60 (16) 276-8962

Rafil Elyas
******************
Email: rafil@disarseter.com
Phone: +60 (12) 389-2260

=====

More Info from Ricecooker.

RAIDED!! Saturday, 31st December 2005: This Year’s Final Threat @ Paul’s Place Balai Polis Brickfields
Apparently, the Police has blocked off Paul’s Place’s entrance, so everyone inside the venue can’t leave. A shorthwhile later we heard that all of them were taken on a Black Maria and brought to the station. How many? Who are they? I don’t know.

The New Year Raid: Full Report by Rafil 0f 360DHR & Disarseter Records
Same entry as this, but you can read comments.

The New Year Raid: Press Conference, all MUST come!
The press conference will address the following issues.
a) Definition and characterization of the Black Metal sub culture; music, lifestyle and philosophies.
b) Superficiality of sub-culture embracement in Malaysia. Here, youths follow the fashion but not the philosophies and beliefs.
c) How Black Metal clamp down operations have spilled over to other sub-cultures and musical genres, punk, hardcore, rock.

The New Year Raid: 4 held to be charged on Tuesday
They found no Black Metal, and no drugs, even after testing more than a hundred people and keeping them in police lock-up until about 6 am. Some of the people taken away had nothing to do with the live music party taking place at Paul’s - they just happened to be chilling out at various restaurants dotted around the area.

I reckon there'll be more stuff on the net soon, but I'm awfully tired tonight so I just went to Ricecooker, pretty much figuring there'd be information there.

Please file a class action suit if you were one of those arrested.

Written by lainie at 12:17 PM on January 2, 2006 in Rants.

So I spoke to my aunt today, who dispensed some advice for those who were caught in the raid.

1) File the civil class action suit.

2) Fast - If you do it in a week, and get the wrong cop, you might end up with questions like "Why did you wait a week, hah? Hah? Hah? What are you covering up?".

3) The more people you get, the better your chances and faster everything will move along.

=====

The New Year Raid: Press Conference, all MUST come!

A press conference is going to be held at Paul’s Place, Monday 2nd January 2006 at 2PM.

All concerned especially those who were detained and also organisers of the show should be there!

here’s the brief:

Press Advisory: Over 300 Youths Detained At New Year’s Eve Celebration.

Dear Sir/Madam,

Brickfields police raided and detained over 300 young men and women ushering in the New Year at Paul’s Place, a local venue popular with the local independent music community on Saturday, 31 December 2005. The following day, local TV news reported that the youths were attending a Black Metal performance.

Those detained, consisting of local, Japanese and Singaporean independent musicians and audience members denied any connection with the Black Metal sub culture or genre.

We, concerned professional and amateur musicians, would like to invite you to a press conference.

The press conference will address the following issues.
a) Definition and characterization of the Black Metal sub culture; music, lifestyle and philosophies.
b) Superficiality of sub-culture embracement in Malaysia. Here, youths follow the fashion but not the philosophies and beliefs.
c) How Black Metal clamp down operations have spilled over to other sub-cultures and musical genres, punk, hardcore, rock.

Press Conference Details

Chair:
Mr. Rafil Elyas – Principal Process Engineering Consultant – Mathematical Modeling and Simulation. Band: 360 Degree Head Rotation
.
Panel Members:
Mr. Julian Mokhtar - Professional musician and guitar luthier.

Mr. Azmyl Yunor – Lecturer; Journalism, Cultural and Cinema Studies. Singer songwriter.

Ms. Hana Abd Aziz – Student, Diploma Graphic Design. Band: Lucy in the Loo.

Mr. Paul Millot – Inventor, solar energy specialist. Band: Brown Sugar.

Ms. Jacklyn SM Kee – Consultant and activist.

Venue: Paul’s Place
Time: 2 pm
Address:
(Please refer to the map below)
8, 2/137B (Top Floor), Resource Industrial Center.
off Jalan Klang Lama
58200 KL, Malaysia
(Opposite the highway from Pearl International Hotel, OUG)

Paul's Place

Written by lainie at 12:51 PM on January 2, 2006.

From TV3 News *eyeroll*. PLEASE, allow me to utilise my shit grasp of the Malay language to tell you what was reported.

Hasil Maklumat, 35 Pegawai Dan Anggota Polis Dari Balai Brickfield, Menyerbu Premis Tertutup Di Batu Lima Jalan Klang Lama Kira-Kira 11 Malam Semalam.

Ketika Serbuan, Mereka Sedang Asyik Menari Dan Menyanyi Bersama Kumpulan Muzik Yang Menyanyikan Lagu Berunsur Tidak Sihat.

Setiap Pengunjung Dikenakan Bayaran 15 Ringgit

Hampir Semua Mereka Berbaju Serba Hitam, Malah Kira-Kira 10 Dari Remaja Perempuan, Bertudung.

310 Lelaki Dan 70 Perempuan Kemudian Dibawa Dengan Sembilan Buah Trak Ke Balai Polis Brickfield Untuk Siasatan Lanjut.

Turut Ditahan Tujuh Remaja Bawah Umur, Serta Enam Warga Singapura Dan Dua Warga Jepun.

Menurut Ketua Polis Daerah Brickfield, A-C-P Mohd Dzuraidi Ibrahim, Segelintir Mereka, Golongan Profesional Seperti Pensyarah Dan Peguam.

Pemeriksaan Rekod Jenayah Dan Ujian Air Kencing Juga Dilakukan .

Seorang Lelaki Yang Menjaga Premis Terbabit Turut Ditahan.

Siasatan Mendapati Premis Terbabit Tidak Mempunyai Sebarang Lesen Perniagaan Manakala Perhimpunan Dan Acara Yang Diadakan Tidak Mendapat Sebarang Permit.

Sejumlah Risalah, Cakera Audio, Poster, Kain Rentang, Kemeja-T Dan Pelbagai Jenis Lencana Turut Dirampas..


=====

[ Rough translation because my Malay sucks]

The result of 35 policemen raiding a closed premise on Old Klang Road at 11pm last night.

During the raid, they were DANCING and SINGING along with bands singing songs with "unhealthy elements".

[ Yes, I'm sorry y'all, you guys were arrested for the diabolical act of singing and dancing - I hope none of you were waving a bleeding chicken, I understand you were probably looking for a vet at that time, but our police are not the most understanding crowd about. In fact, you could say there's very little they seem to understand ]

All customers were charged 15 Ringgit

[Paul and the bands must have made quite a bundle just from the police that night, eh? 35 x RM15 = RM 525 ]

Almost all were wearing black clothes, in fact, about 10 of the young women were wearing headscarves.

[ And imagine, we can get people arrested for wearing clothes we don't like? Quick, someone hand me a tv remote, I gots me some people I'd like to round up. Now where's that drat Chinese show........ ]

310 males, 70 females, were then brought in 9 trucks to the Deathstar Brickfields Police Station for further investigation

[ Further investigations will reveal......they got nothing but a lot of pissed off musicians and music lovers. Oh, and people sitting in a restaurant nearby, who probably didn't even know what kinda noise was coming out of the building nearby. ]

Also arrested were 7 underaged youths, along with six Singaporeans, and 2 Japanese.

[ Not mentioned: Also arrested, were the 200 black metal kids we were looking for. Dammit. What do we do? OH LOOK! TEENAGERS! And no one likes Singaporeans! YES WE ARE SAVED! And let's throw in the Japanese cause they're a weird Hello Kitty country anyway. ]

According to the Chief of Police for Brickfields, there were professionals in the crowd, including.....uhm. I don't know what Pensyarah is, sounds debate-y. And Peguam. Which means lawyers.

[ You dipshi........Yes. Well done. Unlawful arrest of crowd that includes lawyers. And ZOMG, black metal is invading adults! ]

Checks for Criminal Records and Urine tests were done.

[ Of course, this is a country that managed to arrest MEOR for BUSKING, so it really makes you wonder what they mean, exactly, by 'Criminal Records' ]
[ And last I heard, everyone but four were released because NO ONE failed the drug test. And the four? Arrested as organisers of the event. Jeeeeeeeeesus ]

A man in charge of the premise was also arrested.

[ Well, hell, we all know David, he's in charge of the bar most times ]

Invastigations discovered that the premise does not have any business license and the gathering / event did not have a permit.

[ I don't know about the license bit, but you need 500 people before you need a permit, and according to Peter Brown there were at best 150 there, including the poor buggers sitting in the cafes downstairs ]

Some magazines, CDs, Posters, (I dont know what), Tshirts and badges were confiscated.

[ YOU CHEAPSKATES! If I wanted magazines, CDs, posters, (whateverthehellkainrentangis), Tshirts and badges..........I HAVE TO GO SHOPPING. ]

======

And yknow. I like that they brought along the TV3 news crew. Ah. Ahhhhh. What were you expecting then?

I'm wearing a black tshirt right now, yknow. And I have long hair. Then again, my tshirt is a Gila-Gila comics one (Gila Gila is Malaysian version of MAD!). Of course, black metal tshirt / comic tshirt, black metal gathering / no black metal bands playing that night, what do lil details like that matter?

It's almost too much to wish that there'd be some press release from the police, saying "We were wrong, you were right, we don't know what black metal is, we can't count beyond a hundred so got the crowd estimate wrong, here's David and co back, and you can have your CDs, and tshirts too. Sorry we don't know who took the ICP badges, we saw the clown and thought it was nefarious looking ]

Written by lainie at 11:13 PM on January 2, 2006.

Not that I reckon it shows in my blog, but I love reading. And it's sad that it's gotten to the point I onlyhave the time to spare during holidays - Bernice asked me the other day what I was reading, and I said "I'm reading something, I just can't remember what".

And it's not like I'm reading one book - it's about four or five, depending on which room I'm in, I probably have a novel waiting for me there. So yeah, now that I'm on holiday, it's time to catch up. Books books books books - I am, actually, quite nerdy.

=====

I met up with my cousins earlier in Times Square. Doing the yearly thing of "hey, let's keep in touch!". Yesterday, I found out Patrick knows of Zedeck (same school). Today, I find that Erik, Patrick's elder brother, knows of Zedeck's girlfriend, Iszie (mutual friends), though they don't know each other personally.

*Whew*.

Something about Erik meeting Zedeck but the tall boy was drunk (sounds rather alike to when I first met the boy too, really). It's freaky how small the world is, no?

=====

I was actually supposed to go for the Press Conference, since most of my friends are the gigging sort, and this concerns them, so they were there. Found out later, through smses, that more people than I thought were there.

I read the list of people (in link above), and was glad to see people from different parts of the music scene turned up (though really, it's not that big a community so the fact that it affects us all is starker).

I am actually going to read the newspapers tomorrow, yknow, just to give my blood pressure a nice healthy kick in the ovaries.

=====

After that, headed over to Lai Foong, this really old Chinese cafe my mother used to go every Sunday with her parents, when she was growing up. Did I just say my mother is really old? Let's just assume "old" for cafes are different from "old" for mothers.

This, in any Asian family, holds true (if you know what's good for you).

Met up with Daph, Nessa and co there. Since there were a big bunch of tourists there, told them about the recent "arrested for Black Metal at a gig that did not play Black Metal" thing.

Yknow, you tell a Malaysian the same thing, and they're disgusted, but they'd expect something like this from the police. Really. I say, it's more surprising to hear about a cop that gave you your speeding ticket straight out, than it is to hear about one who twiddled his pen, hmmm, hahhhhed, looked at your IC / driver's license about twenty times, scribbled your name on some scrap piece of paper under the ticket, while asking you if you were absolutely sure you could afford the fine, which is RM300, yknow, are you sure you want to pay it.....sorry where was I?

But yeah. Tell a tourist, and beyond the normal outrage at how stupid the whole thing is....You get a lot of confounded looks. As in....they really, REALLY don't get it. I mean, we don't get it either, but we're resigned and desensitised to the stupidity, yknow?

This is like Bush-level stupidity, so of course it confuses anyone who isn't used to it, like tourists.

Then we walked over to Pasar Seni, where all the crafts stuff are. The only shop Nessa and I really remember is the one with all the aboroginal sculptures and masks, because they got this set of really cool sculptures, it's just the upper figure of a dude hugging this HUGE HUGE HUGE penis (presumably, his own, and not some gay sex god).

Then after that, headed over to KLCC to meet Kaz and Fip. Yes, Fip and I have broken up but we're still friends. Kaz showed me his new tattoo, a joker.

I also got him to explain somewhat, the story behind his short comic, which I loved when I saw the last time, but never totally figured it out, especially the last few panels. You gotta go open it up though, it's a wonderful example of a short comic.

I asked him about some info on WAO, because he worked there a lil while (his mommy is big into that organisation), and after a recuperation I'd have about two weeks to spare before my next semester starts (I figure though the cash would be nice very good, I don't even have a month to work sooo).

WAO - Women's Aid Organisation.

Kaz was telling me how while he was there, there was a misconception that WAO is a very..........lesbian...........place.

I'm not saying there aren't any. Jesus, there probably are. But, while Kaz was there, apparently he only knew of two who were, in a much bigger group. The others were all straight lil girls who wanted to help and had to put up with family members demanding to know why they were working in a "lesbian organisation".

*Eyeroll*. Okay, lesbian / has a vagina, does NOT automatically equal feminist / activist / whichever-ist, get that into your head.

=====

Did you know, "Low Yat Plaza" distracts the Aussie boys? They keep seeing "Low Fat Pizza". Dude, this is Malaysia, we don't really do no fat stuff here.

Anyways, when friends from other countries come to visit, the first thing we do is weigh them. ESPECIALLY those who say stuff like "Oh, I never put on weight". Ah, come to Ipoh, we'll see what two weeks of hawker food does to you.

Also, we get a laugh everytime we give them 'local delicacies'

1) Ice Kacang.

This is essentially crushed ice, with syrup, nuts, beans and jellied stuff. And corn? Trust me, they'll just look.....at.....it......and wonder why we bother.

2) Chicken flavoured food.

Chicken floss and chicken biscuits. See Westerners screw face up in disgust....Ohmygod, it looks like candy floss, but it tastes like chicken! What the fuck? And why do these cookies taste like chicken? Why aren't they sweet?

Hah....chicken flavoured food is fantastic.

3) Durian flavoured food.

Not actual durian itself, mind, but the kuihs, and weird dodol stuff, and durian pancakes. Mmmm. The joke is, most of the time we won't eat it, but it's too funny a thing to pass up, I'd take a bite if it means seeing a row of tourists trying to be as polite as they possibly can which they attempt to swallow down the durian dodol.

I've been told ages ago that when shopping in Petaling Street (Chinatown), if you're easy to rip off, you get a pink plastic bag (or some other colour?), and if you haggle you get another colour? So the vendors in the next stall know whether or not to rip you off.

Well today they went shopping there, and everyone who haggled got an orange bag, and Blake, who didn't, got a pink one - and they all bought it at the same time.

Does anyone else know anything about this?

=====

In other news, Moonshine is happening again! This Thursday, No Black Tie, repeat performances from Aminah and Reza, new Moonshine acts Shelley Leong, Az Samad, and Plush Velvet - read about the artists here.

In the email notice that came with the details:

Despite recent attempts to target the local indie scene as a scapegoat for social ills (wearing black, listening to loud music, eating at a mamak, picking Paul's Place over a so called sex party in Langkawi (now that's REALLY ill!)), the show must go on. Moonshine is slotted for this coming Thursday, and hopefully I won't get arrested for naming a gig after something illegal. You never know in Malaysia =)

Mmmhmm.

=====

Gah. I'm supposed to be everywhere today, meeting everyone. I'm supposed to be in KL and Ipoh at the same time - but finally settled on KL because I still have a poster to do after this.

But tonight. Ah, tonight is reserved for lying on my bed, a good book, a cuppa coffee, and fuck the rest of the world. Lainie is NOT seeing anyone else today.

Yesterday I had a marathon of old reruns of "The Nanny" on Hallmark. God, I love that show.

Written by lainie at 12:05 AM on January 3, 2006 in Music.

You don't love me at all,
but don't think that it bothers me at all.
You're a bad-hearted boy-trap, babydoll,
but you're...
You're so damn hot.

jengjengjeng

Written by lainie at 12:48 PM on January 3, 2006 in Rants.

Why do I read the papers?

WHY?

FUCK TELL ME WHY????.

Well done, The Star. Fair bit of reporting. So....fair. Yes, I am reading the "Black Metal" arrest article.

I really like how the last 2 columns of the 6 column article were dedicated, out of nowhere, to some Kangar youths locked up for rowdy behaviour and obstructing police duties. Different location, different people, doing different things (waiting for illegal bike races, vs, going for music gig). It makes my heart soar, straight out of my torso, into the dumpster nearby.

I mean, it has no relation to the "Black Metal" gathering (which I say again, had no black metal bands in the first place), except of course, we get the lovely insinuation that they're in the same article because "Black Metal" devil worshippers should be lumped together with those who fight police and have illegal motorcycle races.

FUCK. YOU.

Why not go raid Zouk again, huh? Got too many Dato's and Menteri's sons, didn't you? And their girlfriends?

[ Alllllllll rumours of course. Hem. ]

Is black metal even fucking illegal? Yeesh. I am trying to write a letter to the editor, but I can't compose a paragraph without about nine fucks in each sentence so it's making my head spin. And why am I bothering? Sometimes I wonder.

And the most condescending part of the article, lil factbytes.

What? Four alleged Black Metal followers released on bail.
Where? Brickfields police station.
Why? They were picked up with some 380 people for allegedly attending a Black Metal gig on New Year's Eve.

I really see no point in that. What, so you don't have to read the whole article, there it is, the general gist in three sentences?

Well, it's nice to know the reporters there have the "Who, what, where, why, how" down pat. WELL DONE. Oh yeah, bay-beh, here let me hand you an award. It's called "Pathetic To The Core".

You know what sucks the most? I bet they know there weren't any Black Metal bands playing there that night. I like how they didn't mention that it was a violation of human rights too. Or that the arrest was illegal.

Lovely piece of reporting. He said, she said, he did, they said, they then did, and he said, she said, they said. Theytheytheythey. We, on the other hand, have no opinion on this issue beyond what headline, and subheadline, to give it

We don't have reporters. We have typing parrots.

Now go learn how to ask some better questions before wasting my time reading that crap piece of article that cost me more time and money than I care to spare.

=====

RELATED EVENTS.

Both this Saturday.

Signing.

Those who'd like to sign the memorandum that will be submitted to the Human Rights Comm, can do so at KL Performing Arts Centre.

Food Not Bombs: Workshop - Know Your Rights with The Police.

Bolehkah polis mengambil/meminta I/C anda tanpa sebab?
Polis tiba - tiba menahan anda semasa di acara muzik, bagaimana?
Polis membuat serbuan di pertunjukan muzik independen, apa yang harus dilakukan??
Polis berpakaian biasa cuba menahan anda, apa reaksi sepatutnya?

penyalahgunaan kuasa polis berlaku dimana-dimana dan di pelbagai strata komuniti masyarakat. Pada malam perayaan tahun baru 31 disember 2005, di acara muzik independen yang berlansung di Pauls place, pihak polis telah melakukan satu penahanan yang terang-terangan melanggar prosedur sepatutnya penahanan. Ekoran daripada kejahilan kita dengan hak-hak yang kita ada apabila berhadapan dengan polis menjadikan ia satu titik untuk mereka menggunakan budaya ketakutan, membuli dan melanggar etika penahanan. Dengan mengetahui cara yang sebenarnya berhadapan dengan pihak polis/berkuasa, penahanan dan pembulian oleh polis boleh dihalang daripada awal tanpa perlu meleret hingga ke balai polis/lokap

KETAHUILAH HAK ANDA BERHADAPAN DENGAN POLIS !!
dengan menghadiri bengkel KUASA -KUASA POLIS
(bengkel latihan untuk menjadi pelatih dan membuat bengkel sendiri di tempat masing-masing)

tempat : LOST GENERATION SPACE,
no.11, lorong permai, off jalan syed putra,
robson heights, 50460, KL
( * lihat peta dan public transport ke sana di:sini )

tarikh : 7 Januari 2005 (sabtu)
masa : 10.30 pagi - tamat (petang)
kontek: 012 243 8406
013 243 7092

organise by FOODNOTBOMBSKL

====

Related links (for once, not Ricecooker links ). You must forgive my link-tardiness, ever since my laptop reformat, I've only relied on Technorati to update me, and it's not very comprehensive.

Suanie: Duduk kat rumah je lah.

Erna: The coppers are scared of rock and roll.

Biggest Farce in History.

New Year Raid: This Year’s Final Threat @ Paul’s Place.

2006's First Raid

JeffOoi: Media and Police: The disturbing nexus... ( 2 ).

Feel free to link-drop related articles in the comments box. Free for all.

Written by lainie at 10:29 PM on January 3, 2006.

So. I wanted to go for a candlelight vigil recently, and though I won't give you a whole list of reasons, let's just say a small one was that there's a part of me that's just insanely curious.

I'd want to see, what is being done, who is there, are they alright, what reactions does it garner, does it provoke passerbys?

I can only hope, this is not the same as nosy.

Anyways. Never mind that, I didn't make it (family can be frustrating sometimes).

But.

I want to know something (pleasethankyou mustnotforgetmannersnow).

And you need to tell me.

Keep in mind, I don't consider myself an activist.

[ And I have to say that, because I've been called one before, and it didn't sit right with me, so I'm not. Really. Not even close. ]

So. Tell me.

What do you think of activists?

To narrow it down a bit (in case I get comments about how people complaining loudly at the mamak about politicians are annoying and ruin your appetite)......

What do you think about activists AFTER they get arrested?

If the arrest was fair, and they were causing trouble? If the arrest was unjust?

Do you think, fuck, I wish they could just have a space to say what they need to.

Or do you think, fuck, serves them right, they should know this would happen

Or fuck, I have no idea what these people are going on about.

Or what? Like, seriously, when you see or hear of demonstrations, and that they were arrested or something, what do you think?

I mean. It's essentially a bunch of people trying to get your attention, on a day when you're probably just trying to catch the next train at Masjid Jamek, because waiting an extra 5 minutes for the next one will tire you out and it's already been such a horrid day in the office, your manager is the bitch from hell, and there are people around telling you there's even more stuff out there that you need to spend energy on to know, to think over, to remember, to learn about, to care, to make better, help out, sometimes they're waving banners, making noise, sometimes they're handing out leaflets and you're already so tired even the paper seems cumbersome and and and.

Wait, where was I?

What do you guys think about activists, and what they do?

It's a curiosity thing. Indulge me.

[ And on the off chance an activist is reading this - Reta? Tiara? tell me, what you reckon people think of you guys then? I mean. Hell, do you guys even consider yourselves one? ]

Written by lainie at 01:32 AM on January 4, 2006 in Arty stuff.

Mmmh. I still have workaholic tendencies left over from the semester, but no desire to work on my last broadsheet poster for Mr Teh's class.

Instead, I've been making 5 - 8 minute posters (the one good thing about Alfredo and Meifei's class, I can vector really, really, really fast now).

I uploaded on Deviantart as well, but heck here it is anyway (to be honest, the stuff on my DA makes me wince a lil):

Please note, posters are not meant to be intelligent, in fact I made the first one while waiting for dinner (plumber was tinkering around with the pipes in the kitchen, and there is no way I can say this without KA perverting it, so I'm not gonna try).




The first one was made because a while back I was listening to some loud music, in a black tshirt, having just trimmed my hair but it's still long....and reading the ridiculous bit of arrests, and them saying stuff like "They had long hair / wore black tshirts".

The only thing I'm missing is a beach orgy on Langkawi (*wry tone* I'm assuming they meant the rave. Why was Recharged cancelled anyway?)



The second one was made while I was procrastinating, reading a very interesting article called Ordinary Ads, Everyday Images (well, I am supposed to research ad trends and target markets over the hols), and it looks for difference in representation of genders.

And that got me to thinking of what the ads would be like in a world suddenly without women. So I made a poster of two men, in a world without women, looking at each other. And between their bodies, is a silhouette of a woman (welllll, kinda).

Hah.

Open to interpretation. And bad captions. And worse puns.

And yknow.

I still don't feel like doing my last assignment. Which is bad.

=====

Update: It is 3am, I am starting to feel drowsy, my body just swayed uncontrolled a lil, I can barely think. And that, is when I finally opened up the file that says "Teh Broadsheet.Psd".

Wish me good luck, even if I may not deserve it much.

Hah. Someone asked me today if I'd watched Gol&Gincu (she doesn't know I blog). Why suuuuuuuuure I have.

Reminds me of this conversation I had with Tei, of when she watched GolnGincu with her friends in the cinema:

Tei: At first, it was still cool. Then, it reached the part where she said "Hey, you in the pink skirt", and I was like "Woah".

[ She pauses, and looks around ]

Tei: I was like, "Did anyone else, yknow, notice that?", then I thought to myself, Tei, you're just being so *head gesture* because you're *head gesture*

[ We were sitting near her family so she couldn't actually say LESBIAN DYKEDYKEDYKEDYKE out loud ]

Lainie: That could not have been the *only* time you said that. I mean. The entire movie.
Tei: Yeah I know. Then right after I thought that, my totally straight friend leaned over and asked "Is it just me.....Or does this movie seem to be talking about something else?"
Lainie: Haha!

I wish I could post up a photo of how blur the Tei looks, when she's acting out scenes she was surprised. Absolutely stunned.

But I have enough weird Bernice Chauly stalkers on my site (I am STILL getting hits for her from Google, oh my god), Nessa stalkers, and occasional Daph stalkers, I don't need Tei stalkers as well. If Bernice is bad, Nessa's annoying, Daph's puzzling, the amount of girls after Tei will just make my blog look like some stalker labiafest.

[ I mean, my blog, supposed to be, yknow, about ME. ]

Seriously. It's crazy. I go to music gigs, people there know her. I go to college, people there know her. I go for theatre, they know her. I go to an art gallery, they know her. I go for some 16 day activism thing, they know her. I talk to people, and somehow it'll emerge they know her.

It's like the Tei connection is unescapable. It makes me want to find something to bop her head with.

=====

Update: Guhhh....what the fuck was I crapping about back there bout Tei. Talk bout random.

5.18am: DONE! PRINTING TOMORROW! SHIIIIIT!

Written by lainie at 01:50 PM on January 4, 2006.

Mmm. Surprised everyone by waking up early cause I went to sleep at dawn - had to go get printing done. Logged onto MSN to ask around, ended up getting printer's info from Kevin on where to go print.

Went there, it was still closed, till about 10.30 am, so I waited more than an hour. Found out I couldn't afford the A1 printing anyway (almost 100), so I did a smaller version and hoped Mr Teh wouldn't mind. Sigh. All that effort into the poster too.

Walked home from college. Am really tired.

Got home, and came up with a vector image.



Too lazy describe- go here:Piss Take Poster. The bit that took longest was the earth thingie. A few minutes. It looks underdone, but I'm just making these posters to calm down and get ready for bed.

Actually. When I got home, Buster was endlessly accosting Belle, trying to hump her. I'd just taken that walk home, and put up with endless catcalls, ruderies, and godknowswhatelse a girl has to go through just to get home. I am tired of flipping guys off, confronting strangers, glaring, ignoring, and yelling fuck you after retreating backs.

I do NOT need to come home and see Belle traumatised by a big horny dog, it reminds me too much of the male harassment just trying to walk home. So I looked at Buster, who was still wagging his tail and trying blindly to hump Belle as she ran here and there, whining and snapping occasionally at him.

Yelled at Buster "DAMMIT!" then shoved him outside, and allowed Belle to stay in with the fan and Jazz music playing. She gets really upset cause Buster keeps trying to mount her (and he's utterly inept, also very heavy).

It's bad enough I take it on the streets, I'll be damned if I see it at home too, even if it's just the dogs.

=====

Gonna sleep, then call CJ, I'm supposed to meet up with the boy today.

Written by lainie at 11:17 PM on January 4, 2006 in Daily Life.

HELLO PEOPLE!

Right. BlacK Metal. Centre for Independent Journalism, CIJ, has just set up a blog to look at how the media covers the Black Metal issue here:



Media & Black Metal in Malaysia Looking at media coverage of the 'Black Metal' issue in Malaysia.

Right now, they're still collecting articles, but later on, they'll have discussion threads going on. This is just a mini-update so you people know where to go if you'd like. The blog's set up by Sonia Randhawa.

If Sonia's name is familiar it's cause asides from her name popping up everywhere thanks to CIJ, she was the one mentioned in articles as bringing in HAKAM and SUARAM to help when the raid happened.

I'll inform you guys again once the site is fully up, but for those who'd like to poke around and feel their blood gurgle a lil, there's a collection of articles that have gone up.

=====

Danlim sent me a video of Frank Zappa on Crossfire, Good entertainment.

=====

I've had people ask me, now that I've broken up with Fip, what next? Specifically, "What" refers to men or women.

Jesus, people, what do you consider me to be? Psychic? If I could tell the future, I wouldn't be here blogging. I'd be on some rocking beach holiday and fucked out of my mind out there making the world a better place *looks away and whistles*.

But yknow, if I ever turn psychic, you'll be the first to know. Promise. Unless my kickass visions, which I really do have, really really, tell me I shouldn't tell any of you.

Seriously though. I'm just gonna enjoy singledom for a while.

=====

I pet humans the way some people pet dogs. I mean, is that disturbing? Why can't I pet humans?

[ And I do not want to hear any bloody bloomin "heavy pettin" jokes, these are my friends and I really do not need the visuals ].

Today, as I bought coffee at 7-11, the cashier asked me "Is that all?". All I did was point at my stuff and said "Oh, and this one".

She repeated "And this one" several times to herself, softly, as she tapped away at the till. I mean. What? Is it my accent? Do I have one? Are you just kinda strange? Either way, it was kinda weird.

=====

Meanwhile anyone have books to recommend? Preferably short stories, to match my attention span. The last few authors whose works I've read are Isabel Allende, Banana Yoshimoto, Gustave Flaubert, Gabriel Garcia Marquez, William Trevor, and Melissa Bank.

Otherwise, if it's novels, try to suggest one where I won't need a dictionary by my side to understand what's going on.

And. Uh. If you're aware of the prices, not too expensive would be good. I mean, I love Pablo Neruda too, but RM70 a pop is a bit painful yknow.

If not, I'll just save up and get more Bananananana Yoshimototototo.

Written by lainie at 12:56 AM on January 5, 2006 in Rants, Daily Life.

Someone who'd just come to Malaysia recently, asked me about the new Syariah laws he'd heard about.

[ The entry I lost my head a lil ]

The question: How come if it was unfair it still got through?

And it's sad to have to admit that actually, some women senators did want to oppose it, but were told to toe the line and approve it.

And they did. Which is........not good. Because technically, if you can tell people how to vote, and if you're a blooming idiot in charge of them, we're gonna have a lot of stupid laws in the future. Stupidity is a lot more bearable, than say, meeting the consequence of stupidity in legislation.

I am kinda glad I don't work with people, sometimes, because if I have to meet some woman who got fucked over in Syariah courts (and it's not like that hasn't happened, Moorthy, anyone? At least you get a raise?), I really won't know how to say to her face that it'll be okay. Mostly because I'd think, there's no way this is fair, I can't justify it, and I can't make you feel better, I'm sorry the 19 women were Whipped in line, and now you're suffering for it.

[ In case you missed that, Lainie happens to be highly pessimistic about her abilities to deal with people ]
[ Also, highly pessimistic about the law itself ]

Then I said, "But hey, they promised to look into it after the bill is passed". Jesus, even I feel stupid saying something so incredibly lame, how the hell did that guy manage to say it in a newspaper interview?

Then I was asked, okay, so the women toed the line. What about the male senators?

Har, har. Har, har. What about the men, indeed. Please, allow me to rip off the newspaper clipping (of The Star, I'm such a hypocrite, I know):



Not the prettiest picture, is it?

Am I just somehow paying more attention to the news, or are things just generally more fucked up?

======

So I'm reading Galaxie magazine. And by "reading", I mean "looking at", because it's a poster edition, so it's all pictures of people.

Which just goes to show, words aren't really that important. Essential part of a magazine is to have heaps of people you recognise, looking richer than you, posing in it. Anyway, as I flipped through, a few things caught my eye.

First of all, a jeans advertisment. I blocked out everything except the caption:



I mean, I hate to sound twelve, but yknow, I totally saw something else when I flipped the pages. Hee hee hee, it's not that hard to figure it out once you look carefully. Which is why, kiddies, you have to be careful which type you choose - especially scripts and stencils.

The other thing. The posters. Okay. I see a lot of skin, sexy poses, glittery hair, and skimpy clothes.

By a show of hands, who here thinks I'm talking about men? Yah, didn't think so.

I see:

i) small, topless photo of Tom Welling, a screencap off an episode of Smallville.
ii) Simon Webbe of boyband Blue, in a V-neck, so I can see bits of his chest.
iii) Some dude called Rain, with a lil wee bit of chest showing.
iv) to push it a lil, some VJ dude called Dominic has a bit of chest hair showing through his shirt.
v) small promo pic of previous Galaxie cover featuring half nude guy beneath sheets.
vi) and on the last page, another small pic of two topless male models.

So, amongst the lil pictures, 3 instances of manflesh. Among the posters, 3 slight glimpses of chest through open neck shirts.

In a magazine that has on it's cover "ABSOLUTELY BURSTING WITH OVER 60 POSTERS!" and a photo of Tom Welling underneath it.

Then I buy it, in all anticipation of sparkly clean eyes by the time I'm done with it, but ARGH MY EYES THEY BURN.

Galaxie: I feel cheated.

Really. I do. All I saw, in terms of flesh, was HEAPS OF POSTERS of women flesh. I saw bare backs, navels, cleavage shots (oh, heaps of that), thighs, pouty lips, sexy poses (yeah so now you guys know which magazine to get this week). Oh, the women are all out there with their bodies. Do I mind? No. What I mind, is that the only man thigh I saw belonged to a footballer.

Then I flip back to the cover again, that says "60 posters" with Tom Welling beneath it. Pffft. That's blatant sexism it is. Why don't the girls get something better than what seems like a generic black tux with different faces stuck on top?

Sure, there were men in the issue. Lots of posters of men. All wearing the same clothes in different colours. Nothing exciting.

Where are my gratuitious man shots? Where are the hulky shiny muscles, the topless andro boys, the cheeky "I just got out of bed have messy hair and am wearing boxers but hey we'll pretend these are shorts", the beach boys, the the the.....

For every boob cleavage shot there, I demand a sexy poster of some dude's body bits. It's a goddamned MAGAZINE OF PEOPLE. Gather up your fucking balls and objectify EVERYONE.

[ Wait, did I just say that? Oh well. I don't care. I want my sexy boys. ]

I demand the next issue has more of that shit going on (uhm. preferably better example of male-sexy than Jeff Simmons though, this time yah?). I want my men in glitterati suits, with eyeliner, messed up hair, looking beautiful and most importantly, showing some skin (of course, it could be argued that I'm practically asking for a woman with a penis to be in the magazine, but let's not nitpick or be too typical here).

Actually, that would probably give you less customers. I guess. Who owns Galaxie? The Star. Har har, har har.

=====

My mom is coming down to KL today - so is Gazel, Tommy, and his family. Gah. Human contact.

The dogs are following my crotch about cause I have my period. This is the time when 3 dogs at home can be a bit of a nightmare.

Written by lainie at 11:38 AM on January 5, 2006.

One question, I asked a few:

Hi, wanna come for Moonshine with me tonight?

One answer, I got from each.

"Is Melina playing tonight?"
"Will Melina be there?"
"Oh, Melina not playing? Never mind lah"
"Is the Tempered Mental girl playing?"

KA quoting what her friend asked:

"One question: Is Melina playing".

Oh and:

"Is your lecturer gonna be there?"
"Is Bernice going?"

Fucking lesbians, I tell you, can't you go for the sake of spending time with ME?

Yeesh

Written by lainie at 11:01 PM on January 5, 2006 in Arty stuff.

PRDM



Click this picture for mucho bigger version of it, if you want.

Just a simple vector, of someone in a blue and white uniform.
With a yellow eye.

And. Yknow. I'm just not gonna say anything else.
Consider this a game, with an answer, but one I am unlikely to provide.

It's pretty goddamn simple anyway.

=====

Stuck at home. Doing "filial daughter" obligations by spending time with family - finally seeing my mother after almost 4 months of separation (she's down in KL to accompany Gazel's potential in-laws).

I was supposed to go for Moonshine, but yah, I can't make it happen. :/ I have to be a good lil Asian daughter now.

So, I'm half spending time with them, half hiding behind the computer screen adding circles and letters to this.

It's very simple, really. Didn't take more than half an hour. Extra time taken compared to others, because I keep eating mangosteens - the others're eating durian, and the STENCH, oh my god. Obviously, our King of Fruits does not impress me much.

Anyhow. I don't intend to spend much time on this so. Yeah. This is it.

A name. I call it....P R D M.

=====

AHAHHAHAHHAHA!! I was over at Jamtank, and I am ganking this off:


I had to frikkin' share this. Got a call from NST an hour ago:

*****

Reporter: Did you notice any indication of Satan Worship at Paul's Place?

Me: No

R: Was there a goat present?

Me: Excuse me?

R: A goat.

Me: Kambing?

R: Ya, kambing.

Me: Kambing hidup?

R: Ya, kambing hidup.

Me: Kambing hidup, lari-lari kat venue Paul's Place?

R: Ya.

Me: Kat luar ada kedai mamak, ada kemungikinan besar diorang jual kari kambing. Tapi dalam venue tak nampak.

R: OK, so takde kambing?

Me: Yang lari-lari kat stage, takde. Kalau tapau kari, roti bawak masuk, saya tak pasti.


Basically, Rafil got a call from the newspaper, NST, to ask if there was a goat running around Paul's Place at the "Black Metal" gathering (where it's pretty much been established over and over that it was NOT black metal, and there were no black metal bands, and yada yada bla bla bla).

Goats. *Shakes head*. I seriously hope this is an article done to......yknow. Get a funny quote. On this hilarious piece they're gonna do. To ridicule the whole situation.

Written by lainie at 04:51 PM on January 6, 2006.

Right. Some of y'all have been asking me about human rights / youth organisations. I DON'T KNOW WHERE YOU CAN GO (I'm actually very blur, yknow, not a good source of info at all).

What I do know, is that tomorrow (Saturday morning), there will be a workshop to educate you on your rights, and if you go there, you'll probably meet the right people to answer your questions.

That being said, I'll be there. Uh. For the workshop, not to get questions answered. Well, except the workshop is for answering questions. Wow, I'm confusing myself.

Anyway. Rafil suggested that if you want, contact Centre for Independent Journalism, Malaysia, or HAKAM, as a start.

And yes, Tiara, I asked about the youth rights thingie. I was directed to some thingie thingie but their website is hacked so I really don't know what else to do. What Rafil did say though, and it does seem that way, is that it's a small community of activists anyway, so if you go to the workshop tomorrow, chances are you'd meet some people who'd suit the description. Yah?

But seriously, just come for the workshop tomorrow, it'll be easier. I'll be there for a peek.

Food Not Bombs: Workshop - Know Your Rights with The Police.

Bolehkah polis mengambil/meminta I/C anda tanpa sebab?
Polis tiba - tiba menahan anda semasa di acara muzik, bagaimana?
Polis membuat serbuan di pertunjukan muzik independen, apa yang harus dilakukan??
Polis berpakaian biasa cuba menahan anda, apa reaksi sepatutnya?

penyalahgunaan kuasa polis berlaku dimana-dimana dan di pelbagai strata komuniti masyarakat. Pada malam perayaan tahun baru 31 disember 2005, di acara muzik independen yang berlansung di Pauls place, pihak polis telah melakukan satu penahanan yang terang-terangan melanggar prosedur sepatutnya penahanan. Ekoran daripada kejahilan kita dengan hak-hak yang kita ada apabila berhadapan dengan polis menjadikan ia satu titik untuk mereka menggunakan budaya ketakutan, membuli dan melanggar etika penahanan. Dengan mengetahui cara yang sebenarnya berhadapan dengan pihak polis/berkuasa, penahanan dan pembulian oleh polis boleh dihalang daripada awal tanpa perlu meleret hingga ke balai polis/lokap

KETAHUILAH HAK ANDA BERHADAPAN DENGAN POLIS !!
dengan menghadiri bengkel KUASA -KUASA POLIS
(bengkel latihan untuk menjadi pelatih dan membuat bengkel sendiri di tempat masing-masing)

tempat : LOST GENERATION SPACE,
no.11, lorong permai, off jalan syed putra,
robson heights, 50460, KL
( * lihat peta dan public transport ke sana di:sini )

tarikh : 7 Januari 2005 (sabtu)
masa : 10.30 pagi - tamat (petang)
kontek: 012 243 8406
013 243 7092

organise by FOODNOTBOMBSKL

=====

Was talking to Iszie earlier, and she said some of the FNBKL people are fantastic. Mmm. Probably . I was thinking of helping out till I realised none of their operations were anywhere near where I usually am.

But yeah. So, come tomorrow if you wanna! I tried asking my stalkee to go along, but le sigh, le sigh, Lola blew me (off) again.

Oh well. To stalk, is to be persistent, no? Har har, har har.

=====

No time to blog, family duties call.

Written by lainie at 12:59 AM on January 8, 2006.

Katagender people have an interesting demonstration up tomorrow.

It will be at 1pm, SUNDAY AFTERNOON, at Bandaraya station of Star LRT.

It's about the new Syariah laws, and how the women were forced to vote for what they didn't want to.

[ Insert pathos driven talk here ]

I heard bits and pieces of what they had planned. It should be interesting. Pop over if you wanna. They'll have a petition up, for those who are against the new Syariah laws, so you get to sign it if you wanna.



Katagender will be doing a parody on what happened while passing the bill. They'll have fake cut-out smiles as the 'women senators' sign the bills, someone to hold a whip, hopefully, and so on.

And to address what Fip asked me:

No, I reckon it'll be crazy if you get arrested just for watching them demonstrate. I can't say the same for the Katagender folks, but you're not gonna be cuffed just for looking.

=====

And what the hell is this I hear that people have been linking to me as "The Lesbian"?

GAHHHHHH.

Only two people, I take that from. Nessa, and Justine. Okay?

Written by lainie at 01:59 AM on January 8, 2006 in Daily Life, Arty stuff.

So. I went for the workshop today. I was dreadfully early, cause my aunt dropped me off. I was there by 9 something. Being me, obviously I got the time wrong (10.30am). Being my luck, there was no one to open the door - though this I really didn't mind as I hung round outside re-reading the book I finished last night.

Then the mozzies came and I started to mind because it was too early in the morning to be losing blood to anything but my period. Good timing though, cause that's when the doors open. They looked AWFULLY surprised to see me there (I didn't realise I was very early).

There's a reason why my friends have a "Not Lainie" philosophy.

As in,
Who's Organising?
Who Do We Call For Information?
Who Knows What's Happening?
Who Knows Date, Time, Venue?
(Not Lainie)

Being me, I also gave Fip the wrong time for the workshop (apparently, the night before, I insisted 10pm, and of course it was over by then :/ My only saving grace is after dating me for so long, she knows I'm completely hopeless at anything that involves putting stuff in order).

As for the workshop thing, it was about how to deal with the police. I know this is a stupid thing to say this in Malaysia, but my grasp of the Malay language is terrible. I had heaps of Malay friends in school, and they used to speak to me in Malay just for some ready-made laughs at my doddly language's expense.

[ Insert cunning-linguist joke here ]

Seriously, you people don't help. You guys don't sound like the textbooks I used to read - and let's just say that wasn't my strongest point anyway.

Overall, quite informative, though the really helpful part came at the last two hours of the workshop (it lasted till about 7pm, since we only started properly about noon). This recollection might be quite inaccurate, I'll explain why later.

There was a bit where they were talking about groups that were "ditindas"?

I didn't really catch on what that meant. I was thinking minority (but it turns out that's just minoriti in Malay, bah). Then I thought, maybe segregation? But I see kids in the list. But women didn't make it in. So I still am not entirely sure what "tindas" is. It just sounds like "tandas" to me.

I asked Iszie what it meant, but she messaged back to say she didn't know how to translate it soooo....

======

Albert Nok was there. I mainly remember his blog as the black one that always refuses to load on my laptop, but he has a shiny new website now.

And it loads.

=====

Met Dennis, of Katagender. We talked briefly, he likes metaphysical stuffies. I mentioned that I preferred more tangible ideas. He said nothing was really tangible, including language.

Oh, one of those people...........(brain immediately farts and leaves me on my own).

He called me an empiricist (not true, actually, I'm closer to rationalist, but just the name implies thought, which I don't do much of tralalalalaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa).

Then he started talking about ideas, and how a table wasn't really a table but an idea of a table - that's about when I steered the conversation to something more comfortable, ala John Locke and Descartes (or however their names are spelled), because fuck if I'm going to use any brain power to talk about the endless obnoxiousness of anything philosophical and screams of Plato and deconstruction (or whatever they're called, sorry, it's been 6 years since I've touched a book on philosophy).

I ended up confusing him, and myself, because I don't really think. How did I do that? I tried explaining how the empiricists and rationalists aren't that different (even though, they really are, yknow, complete opposites), which in a sense is rather deconstructionist argument (not my strong point in the first place), and I tend not to complete my sentences (in fact, you're supposed to understand all the words I'm too lazy to say by how I vaguely gesture with my hands).

Yeah, it's so sad when you can actually admit that you don't like thinking. But I don't. I'm lazy. I vibe off how I feel, and have vague "wavy line feels" about everything, but make me order that with words into a sentence, and you usually have a lot of people giving me blank looks. So yeah, Dennis gave up on what I was saying after a while.

[ Puts on best "I am artsy fartsy and you engineer people just cannot understand me" pose and look - Assistant, black beret please. ]

I no longer have any idea what I'm talking about.

I only have one brain (and even the existence of that has been questioned), I can't afford to fry it before I'm thirty.

So I'm gonna stop now.

=====

Met a guy called Hazri. He likes ISA. He's very comfortable with it. We had a very headache-inducing (for me) conversation, where he said it helped to get information -shouldn't this be a sign that something is wrong with investigations if they can only work effectively, and efficiently (and stop telling me those two words mean the same thing, dammit), by bullying?

I said, it's a law that's at the mercy of whichever dickhead can use it, and if someone's balls (or breasts, let's be fair here) grow too big, some people are gonna get into very unnecessary and unfair trouble, yah? And it's happened before. I mean. I am very uncomfortable with the idea of human rights violation in legislation, I don't care what the fricking excuses (hem, reasons, that is) are.

He said ISA needs fine-tuning. Well, finally something we agree on. My idea of fine-tuning = throw in dustbin, but that's not quite his idea. His end result of fine-tuning ISA sounds heaps like what our....yknow....basic....judicial....system.....would....be...............without.......ISA.

We agreed to disagree. And as usually happens, I thought of Dinzlink (who was the first person to mention he approves of ISA, to me), and immediately felt the kind of annoying "I don't understand them" twinge I get.

We also talked about some politick-y stuff. Our democracy is basically a farce. I said, I think it's really, really, really weird that people go "Hey, we're all the same race let's start a political party together". He said it happens in Europe too, but hmmm. I don't know much about politics.

In the workshop, this point was brought up a few times: That even though we have a choice to vote, our choices are quite limited.

=====

Hasri said something very interesting though. He told me there was this new place where people could speak their thoughts out and be heard.

I was thrilled! Where is this fantastic new place? Is there a train I can take to it? Who set it up?

Then he very carefully introduced me to the concept of the blogosphere.

Oh, that sphere. Yeah I've heard of it *eyeroll*. And who the hell said there's free speech on the internet?

[ Unless you join a Usenet group, then there's not much I can say ]

Seriously. If you talk to bloggers, you'd find that most of us self-censor. I think the most notorious among us for not self-censoring is Sixthseal, and look what happened to him :/. I've been told by a LOT of people I'm basically next, after Sixthseal, in terms of not censoring - something I'm not comfortable with because it seems to imply that after HB they're coming after me.

Also, I was uncomfortable because I heavily self-censor. For everything I blog about here, there's about 60% I don't. And I'm not talking about inane stuff that aren't worth bloggin (because, *gestures* as you can see, that doesn't really stop me most times). I really mean, stuff I'd like to say, but won't because I feel I can't really.

True, Hazri meant politics, but everyone just hedges about topics anyway.

Seriously - you tell me of ONE MALAYSIAN BLOGGER, with high readership, who has said anything politically controversial. You won't find one. And don't name Jeffooi, that's not what I meant. Forget politically controversial, most of us just make backhanded jokes and remarks about issues in case they're "Sensitive" and we get into trouble over it. We tiptoe, wink, nudge, and act VERY politically correct. We're our own best police, most of us.

Yknow. The EYE of the government feels like it's on you, even if it probably isn't. But you never know who's reading. You never know if you're being read, or if you're someone insignificant they'll scoff at the idea of tracking, or if every sentence and comment you make is being scrutinised for "sedition".

As an example, I tried telling him about that round prison thingie, where the prisoners are in a circle, and in the center is a guard post. The prisoners can't see the guards, but they know the guards have a perfect view of them. And you don't know if you're being watched. So you watch yourself, even if no one is watching you, just in case.

Or something like that. But I couldn't remember what it was called (dratted leaky memory and all), so never mind. Told you it's been years.

[ Update: And some nifty searching through my email account history reveals, it is called a Panopticon - idiots, no wonder I couldn't remember what it's called, it sounds like robot pancakes. Ah technology. ]

But yes, don't assume the internet is as free as you think. I self-censor, and it seems, so do most bloggers I know with comparatively high-readership counts.

=====

Appropriately, while Zappa was talkin about some activist thingie thingie (obviously, not paying as much attention as I should have), my mom sent me an sms, which I shall now proceed to quote verbatim:

"Bandar man open gate let out dog n deman kopi money not 2 nab"

So after many phonecalls (my mom's deafness is amazing when it comes to her cellphone. Try to mutter resentfully when she's scolding you though, and I guarantee she'll hear every word, even if you're already on the way out of the room), turns out that the DBKL people (who are the ones going around shooting dogs with godknowswhat and putting them in trucks to cart them away) had come up to our house, UNLATCHED OUR GATE, and let the dogs out.

Then demanded RM50 bribery to NOT do their dog-catcher 'duties'.

What happened? Sigh. My aunt came out, scolded the fuck out of them before they could catch the dogs, and got them back in. FUCKING CORRUPTED BASTARDS!

Idiots. Don't try to bully women related to me. I'm considered mild-stuff on BOTH sides of my family.

Women on mother's side are known to be a damn fierce lot, yknow. We can trace back generations of women who were educated and pissy for their rights, so the line has been bred to terrorise mankind by now with their temper.

No, actually, we all have thyroid problems, it's why my family gatherings gets a bit freaky sometimes. All those women not in control of their hormones, it's a chauvinistic man's dissing dream (which must be why my parents are married).

Speaking of parents. I got a haircut. Actually, my recent haircut wasn't short enough, and I'd been considering getting it shorter, but at the same time, I kinda like having long hair (not as practical but still).

THEN.

Mom tells me this lil story involving Gazel, Tommy (her boyfriend), and my father.

Basically during dinner, my dad piped up about the new haircut my sister had (very short). What he said, apparently, was along the lines of my sister should not have a short hairdo, because men in general prefer longer hair. And if Gazel DID want short hair, she should ask Tommy's permission first, to make sure he'd like it, dress up according to his preferences, so that he'd be proud to take her around (ie: display like object?).

[ Takes long, meditating breaths ]

Gazel of course said she'd do what she damned well liked, and it was not up to Tommy to dictate what she'd wear or how her hair looked.

Dad told Gazel not to be like that. Tommy said, but there's this shirt you won't let me wear? And Gazel said, "Well, it looks like a dishrag so I'm right".

And in that one sentence, there you go, the women of my family. Know anyone in need of a good emasculation session, send them over to a Choon descendant. That being said, Tommy's a good bloke so he's alright.

Obviously, after hearing that, my iffy-ness over the length of my hair solidified into hardcore "Yes it will be short now", because the one thing I inherited from dad's family (asides from huge feet) was a healthy dose of stubbornitty.

So, you know, if my dad doesn't want me to be bald, he'd better stop where he is now.

[ Dad never did make the connection, that the day he declared that girls should have long hair (while Gazel and I were in school) he didn't see that on our heads for a few years in a row after. Sigh. Convenience, and pissing off your parent at the same time, how could I have resisted in my teenage days? ]

=====

Notice I didn't say anything about what I learned during the workshop. I can berleter-leter like no one's business. And I keep two written diaries on top of that. Hah.

Basically, what the police can, or cannot do. I've assumed a lot of things that weren't true, and it's nice to have it sorted out.

Also, who to report them to, should the police abuse their position.

*Groan*.

Albert was there too, hopefully he's gonna blog about it.

Otherwise, I'll tryyyyyy to translate the leaflet I got, which was a very brief version of what we learned today.

Actually, I've read the leaflet before, got it at some futsal match, but my memory sucks.

======

After the workshop, I hung around, because Dennis said they were going to discuss what Katagender is up to on Sunday afternoon, and asked me to stay behind and see what's up.

Of course, right after saying that I'd stick around, I went to get my shoes and leave because my brain cannot retain information for more than 2 minutes.

[ It's a miracle I have anything to blog about, most times. I have some special blog-memory trained, it's weird. ]

Then he asked me if I wasn't staying, which completely weirded me out because of course I did hey wait am I putting on my shoes at the exit?. Sometimes I don't get myself.

Hung round cause wanted to get the whole "Where do people go if they want to join human rights stuffies" question done once and for all. Dennis said Komas. Which is...uhh...under construction. But they do have a page up for the Freedom Film Fest. Apparently they're great for links to all the organisations. Har har.

[ It is actually possible that I got the name of the organisation wrong ]
[ Which will be updated yet again in another entry, cause I happen to know that when I rattle on like this half of you guys probably stopped reading about twenty paragraphs back ]

Met Jac again (previously met her at a Katagender music thing). She drove me, Dennis and Zappa to some godknowswhere mamak (apparently somewhere in Bangsar).

During the drive there, they were talking about how they like Fiona Apple, PJ Harvey, and early Alanis. I was just listening, and giggling to myself, because I was innocently thinking, "wow, if I added even more "alternative" singers, it'd be like the playlist of an activi....oh wait". Then I thought, "hey, if I add some Ani diFranco, we'd have femini.....oh wait...".

So I giggled to myself at how I was generalising entire groups and their musical taste *shrug*. I didn't get along with my sister while growing up, and I needed someone to talk to. And I was the only person around, so. Single child parents, that was your cue to start contributing to global overpopulation.

Zappa was grumpy from not eating. I was lightheaded - I figured cause I woke up early, hadn't had much caffeine, and had been getting up and sitting down a lot (I have very low blood pressure so I get dizzy from that after a while) during the workshop.

So while they ate, I had two cups of coffee. Figured the sugar and caffeine ought to zing me right back to my normal 9pm mental state.

It did, momentarily. Didn't last long. I'm actually not entirely sure how I ended up there with them? But they were discussing the Katagender demonstration they will have tomorrow.

[ 1pm, Bandaraya Star LRT, there will be a petition to sign against the new Syariah laws. Do be there, dearies. ]

Called Iszie, cause I have her certs and need to hand them to her before I go back to Ipoh. The both of us combined have the most sucktastic memory in the world. I'm betting I won't see her tonight.

Argued with her that Sentul is NOT in KL. I don't care, anything where I can't see Twin Towers, and KL Tower, looking reasonably big, is NOT KL.

Fine, Sentul is in KL. *mutter mutter mutter*.

I was feeling weird throughout the whole mamak thing, kinda floaty. I bit my phone, and finger, which I usually do when I'm floaty cause biting stuff makes me feel grounded (yes, I am aware this, like many things I say, does not actually make much sense).

I remember someone (Jac?) catching me doing that, phone in my mouth, biting, and I almost said

"Oh, don't mind me, I like putting things in my mou........ (OHMYGOD)"

And yet another sentence enters the gallery of "Stupid things I almost, but thankfully never said". Good thing my body was even slower than my brain. I think I exasperated Dennis a little cause I couldn't remember much of what was happening.

After the talk, we got up, and I was lightheaded, and head sluggish, and my hands were shaking. I thought I had too much caffeine. Even laughed at "Look how my hands are shaking!".

=====

Yknow, I realised as I walked to Maybank so Fip could pick me up, that I was swaying as I walked. Which...is not right. But I waited till Fip picked me up anyway. I was very sluggish by then.

She asked me if I had dinner. I said "Of course I have". Then I thought.....wait. Did I?

I mean, it's late, and my stomach's not grumbling, so of course I've....had dinner.

Then I realised the last thing I ate was a lil bit of pie and a small bowl of soup for breakfast. And it was about 10pm by the time she picked me up.

JESUS, NO WONDER I WAS STUPID AND LIGHTHEADED THE WHOLE DAY.

Lainie + growling stomach = grumpy.
Lainie + no food + no hunger pangs = stupid.

It perpetuates, ysee, I'm too dumb to realise I haven't eaten without hunger pangs, and I need to eat to think, sooo......Yeah. I had a burger for dinner. And my brain slowly came back.

Sigh. If I was ever in a BDSM relationship, I might just benefit from it (providing I'm the bitch), because I'm the kind of person that needs someone else to do the organising and ordering.

Fip bought me two books, and okay the light outside my room just went off so I'm kinda nervous....................
Oh wait. it came back on. shall pretend nothing happened .

A Banana Yoshimoto book, Asleep. And a Jhumpa Lahiri one, "The Namesake". Which I'm pretty sure I've read before, but I'm not sure. Yeay books

=====

Oh DAMN.

Haha...I made this nasty 2 minute Photoshop recently, of Paul's Place. I sent it to Rafil, as a joke, because the Photoshopping was so bad I didn't want anyone to know I made it.

Then that arse went ahead and posted it in Jamtank forums anyway, citing me as creator. So, sigh, I might as well upload it here too.



Oh. I think I'd better sleep.

Written by lainie at 10:27 AM on January 8, 2006.

Hi people. Read a graphic design student's blog, read about toilet signs.

======

Dammit, DAMMIT.

I'm from CENFAD (modelled after Parsons)
She's from Parsons.

and her bathroom signage kicks more ass than mine

Gender Anarchy Project.

And you know what sucks the most? I'd wanted to do ambiguous signs as well, where the same weathered wizened face, so wrinkly you can't tell what gender it is....and the rest of that face is wearing an outrageously punk dress / a suit / diapers, and make it into a series. And from there, kinda like a pun on how we define ourselves by our bodies, by what is or is not there, and in a sense those usually marginalised by male-female definitions could enter any of the bathrooms freely yknow?

Cause seriously, are you sure the one wearing a dress is female? It's the same face. And I was seriously considering putting it on the mens' room too. But in Paul's Place (which is basically quite ratty), I could basically stick it anywhere - and the message to people would be, it doesn't fuckin matter, because the toilets are pretty much the same inside.

No, Paul's Place has no Ladies, Mens, thing going on. Everyone uses the same few.

But my lecturer said something along the lines of confusing people (especially those in need of a good piss), and they might not even know it's a toilet in the first place :/

I said something along the lines of they could either let of of their piss and inhibitions, or keep both of them and suffer. And I really don't care if they can't understand it at first glance, that's the whole idea.

[ Well done, Lainie, way to sell yourself to the advertising world - Hire me, and your customers won't have any idea what I'm doing ]

Isn't it funny, if those signages really existed, someone else made it, I might one day blog about it, and complain about which dick wanted me to think on a night when I was drinking beer, just wanted some music, and needed to piss a lot from the alcohol, and those dumbasses can't even put up simple male-female signs just to propogate their agenda.

[ And I'm such a whiny bitch sometimes, it really would be more of a surprise if I didn't whine, even if I didn't actually really mind. ]

And looking at that website, I just realised I could have done something like that. Guhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

=====

This is unadulterated graphic design-envy. Feel free to add it to your coffee, it flavours it well.

Written by lainie at 06:50 PM on January 8, 2006 in Friends.

Nessa and I were talking. She wants to have a "Nessa Tree".

Basically, get a tree in say, Lake Gardens, or KLCC, and claim it as her own. Then do something like label it "The Nessa Tree", and make it distinctive by painting it some colour like purple.

It'll be a tourist attraction, at the very least. People will travel down to see The Nessa Tree.

[ I declined from making any bad jokes ala Nessa Shrubs ]

I said I'd ruin her plans. I'll have a Lainie Tree right next to hers. Bigger and brighter. But she says then it'll be a fad and the rest of you would want one too. So I can't.

so....................................

Wouldn't the paint be bad for the trees anyway?

I don't think my tree will be called Lainie Tree though. I'd call it something like The Bodacious-Noses Tree. Just to fuck with people. And so my mother will have to explain to her friends exactly what her graphic-design daughter is doing naming trees bodacious noses.

Nessa thinks hers will be purple. Mine will be neon and distracting and hopefully will cause traffic jams. Because it's not Average Nose. It's a Bodacious Nose. It must cause accidents.

Update later tonight, I'm feeling very lightheaded.

Written by lainie at 07:25 AM on January 9, 2006 in Daily Life.

Malaysia has been Boing-Boinged recently.

Drawing of the Malaysian "Bigfoot"
Malaysian blogs cover youths detained at metal concerts (submitted by Tiara, again...haha).

=====

It's 4am and I just woke up. If this continues, I'm gonna sleep with a bottle of pills by my bed and take two everytime I open my eyes.

Today (well, Sunday), turned out to be a much longer day than I had expected. So. Blog post will also be long lah, yeah?

I took the train to the Bandaraya station to pokey-nosy at what the Katagender people would be doing for their street demo. Thought, hey, these people aren't so weird, yknow, don't be alienated by what they do, I'll snap some bad photos (I'm a crapsome photographer most times), blog about it, and maybe the next time you see some people doing stuff you don't understand you might stop a while and listen.

[ I was 5 minutes late, delayed because I was talking to myself in front of the mirror and I accidentally pulled this dead-ringer look for an angry Tweety Bird, so I spent more time than I'd care to admit trying to reproduce it ]

The lateness turned out to be a non issue as I waited more than an hour for the rest of the group to arrive. God, these people and punctuality, really not happening, I wonder how they catch movies in the cinema? Dennis was out looking for a cane / whip to buy, because they needed one for their demo. He asked me if I'd brought the cane I said I could, the night before.

Till now I am not sure if he meant I was supposed to bring it, or I could have brought it if I was still at home when he called.

I was on the phone with Fip when I arrived at where the group was. Saw some familiar faces, but didn't really bother to figure out why because of the pics at the Katagender site, I'd drive myself nuts if I tried to remember who I'd seen on the website, and who I'd seen somewhere else.

Did, however, recognise one woman there as she interviewed Fip, KA and I for some gay womens' study. So it was kinda good, because I was trying to find her email address the other day in my gmail, to ask how it was going, and ended up trawling through heaps of stupid messages accumulated thanks to KA's boredom at work. Turns out they had a lot of positive response to the study (participant-wise), which was rather heartening.

Talked to Dennis to confirm again what they would be doing. Met this woman, Angela. She's interesting to talk to - mentioned she was into Gender & ICT right now. Which was strange to me, because I didn't technology could have a gender (and right after Jac said the night before she wanted to do some course she'd heard about, involving females and robots - knowing me, I've probably just totally turned around what she'd said, so don't quote me).

Turns out it's entirely possible to tie in gender with tech. Gosh, did you guys know? GenderIT.org, they even have a webby! Basically, stuff tied in to purchasing power, mobility, something something - better if you go to the website yourself.

Also met someone studying philosophy in America, mostly french philosophy, if I recall correctly. So I racked my brains (which is seriously geographically-challenged) and came up with a few names. I'm not even sure why philosophy seems to be popping up more frequently recently. We talked about deconstruction (again...? in two days?). She said she wasn't a fan of Foucoult's philosophy (something I don't hear often), but did like Gilles Deleuze a lot (and gave me the name so I can look up Anti-Oedipus stuff and the only reason I'm putting this here is because I'd absolutely forget otherwise).

[ By the way, I pretty much told her I'd check it out, but admitted I'd probably forget everything I read and the next time we meet, my average memory recall rates would be about two sentences worth of information ]

I'm antisocial, but I knew I'd be talking to some people from Katagender, so I was mentally prepared for that *eyeroll, I'm such a social pain, I know*....There were actually more people than I expected. Basically just hung around, had two doses of coffee waiting for the thingie to start so I could take piccies, fuck off, and meet up with some people for more coffee.

People kept asking me where I was from, and I kept saying Ipoh.

I'd get these looks, and I'd be a bit "What? I am from Ipoh". But it turns out they just mean "which organisation?". Was mildly tempted to say something like International Woo Woos, but I figured that was a bit too stupid, even for me. So I explained a few times I just wanted to stick around a lil while so I could blog about it later.

Jac and a few others finally show up....Jac has this massive sheaf of didn't-know-what papers, and she was handing them out, generally looking busy - the group was being briefed, but I wasn't paying attention, reckoning I could just pick up later on what they were doing to blog about.

Jac was handing out papers papers papers, and she gave me some to hold on to - I was thinking, last stack of the papers, she must need her hands for something else, like holding up the props for the demo.

Then next thing I knew, she walked off leaving me holding three different stacks of paper (leaflets, leaflets, petitions) and a slightly big question mark over my head. I looked at Angela next to me....

Lainie: Uhhh. Why am I holding so much paper?

And Angela just laughed.

Slowly, too stunned to be horrified, and too slow to think up a response, I realised Jac thought I was there to help out ...................................................................................

..........................
....................................
..........
................................
......................................................???????????????

[ NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! ]

Those lil dots will now symbolise the time that passed by as I tried to think and my mind died on me. Since I'm mostly a play-by-ear person, I just shrugged it off and figured, okay. Fine. I don't like the new thingie either, I guess I might as well. I informed Angela I might be cramping her style a lil while as I figure out what's going on.

You know what's ironic? If there are a few things I'm known for.........

1) I'm not good at being coherent.
2) I don't like people.
3) I am very blur.
4) I am lazy.

[ Best friends like Rish and Daph have been trained to understand that a pointed up chin, round hand gestures, and a slightly strained "Bleaghhhh" means "I dont get it and you need to repeat what you just said you dumb fucks". ]

And what they intended for me to do was

1) make sense when I talk
2) to strangers
3) not be blur.
4) walk a lot.

Gahhhhh. These people.

They'd been announcing earlier to make sure that everyone had at least two numbers, Kecik's(?), Chee or Jac's. Obviously I didn't take down the numbers (though I do have Jac's) because
I figured it still didn't concern me. Though that was the realllll first sign of organisation I'd seen so far, them exchanging phone numbers in case anyone walked down the wrong road and got lost.

Of course, this turns out to be one of my way off base assumptions.

Because Jac (after handing me the papers) started announcing that if we heard some word (and I didn't even hear what it was), we were all to split. Run. Blend into the crowd. Especially if people in uniforms headed our way. Which confused me a lil bit.

Lainie: Did she say run?
Angela: Yeah, run away.
Lainie: As in....*mimes running action*.....RUN?
Angela: Yes.
Lainie: Oh. OH.
Angela: Ahhhh, haha, now she gets it.
Lainie: Oh good grief, is that why they were exchanging numbers?
Angela: Hah...yes.

I must have looked so blur -_-". I was thinking, "What are the chances? But oh dear god, it's early January 2006, way too early in the year to be arrested and piss off my mother.".

I was also thinking, Jesus if I knew this would happen I'd have put more coffee, less books in my bag (I was lugging around about three novels, a sketchbook, notebook, thumbnails sketchpad, Iszie's SPM and Sunway certs, lots of random bits of paper). Nessa later said she didn't know why I was complaining my bag was heavy. Dumbfuck.

Of course, with all that paper on me, I only had one pencil. So I borrowed a pen from Angela (and it said SUHAKAM on the side, so I gave her this wry "Uhuh, you're one of those who get around huh?" looks). Needed it for the petition thingies they were handing out to be signed.

By the way, anyone who thinks I can run is.......Well. I'm slow. I'm so slow I stand a better chance of looking like a tree on the sidewalk than I do of running away in time *mental image of me holding arms out like branches*. I'm a two-branched tree, ignore me, go try to arrest someone wearing sneakers. And my boobs hurt when I run, I have my period goddammit, they hurt more.

Jac was still saying some stuff to the group, but I occupied myself with trying to figure out what the hell was on the leaflets I was holding. It was all in Malay. Oh great. Just fantastic. I'm going to go out, talk to strangers, hand leaflets out and pray like hell they don't ask me what's in it. Then someone said a two minute sentence that basically rounded up what they were campaigning against. Being me, I didn't remember what was said. But I figured. Wokay. I guess I'll just talk about what I know, seeing as to how there's no point me repeating anything I can't exactly remember.

Then they walked to Sogo - because they wanted to reach the crowd there, that consists of a lot of young Malay people. Who speak...Malay. *scratches face*. Tell them about the IFL amendments, the petition, get them to sign it.....sure........ In Malay. Oh-oh. God, I barely make sense when I speak in English, and I'm laughed at when I speak in Cantonese (which is better than my Malay)...........gahhh.

Bobjots blogged a lil about what this whole issue's about (IFL, not my pathetic command over the national language).

We walked over to Sogo's entrance. Jac had on some paper moustache, and a fake whip. Some other women and a guy had on paper masks - and I fucking loved those. Hah, couldn't stop smiling when I saw the big, manic, fake grins they had. Basically a symbol for the senators who were forced to vote for it.

They kicked off the performance by hmmm. Actually, what were they doing? I was talking to other people so I don't really know. I heard a lot of loud voices from them, granted. I think it was Jac (as MP) telling them about new amendments, asking their opinions, and when the 'senators' were against it, were forced into line by Jac (moustache, whip...hee hee hee hee).

Yknow the best way to drive people away? Approach them while holding a stack of paper and a pen. I guarantee it. I felt like an insurance salesgirl, about as appealing as the guy in "Groundhog Day". Just walk up, open your mouth, say "E......" and they'll just say "No" and walk away.

[ Let's just say after a while I thought of many creative ways to use a pitchfork. Well. Maybe not creative, but certainly calming. Well, maybe not calming, but certainly.......satisfactory ]

It's kinda weird, but the young Muslim women seemed the most reluctant to listen to what we had to say............................But those that were walking with their boyfriends would somewhat listen. And the guys are a tad patronising.

By the way, talking to random people sucks balls like I could not imagine before, but am very aware of now.

After a while of them demonstrating....they changed locations. So I thought, yeay, new place. They moved about four meters closer to the entrance. Oh well.

Then after a while, I'm not sure what happened, Chee said "we HAVE to move", but we took our own sweet time so I figured it was probably nothing serious. On the way to the train station, I overheard one of the girls saying she'd eavesdropped on security guards saying stuff like "Catch them, don't let them get away" or something. But I didn't really know what was happening so.

Walked to the second location, Bukit Bintang. You know in front of Maybank, where those dudes playing Aussie music instruments usually perform? Yeah.

Talked to some people again, tried to get them to sign petitions. Nessa came and joined me there, she sat and watched the demo - I asked her later if she understood it, because she hadn't been reading the news and didn't know about this - she said she understood it, so good enough then.

She dissed me for handing out the Malay language leaflets, asking if I even knew what was in them (not really....). The girl who was did the interview last time round (sorry, I am so terrible with names) asked me to translate the leaflet for Nessa (who looks like a foreigner I suppose). Ironic, because at that time Nessa was trying to translate it for me.

I think the only thing that helped me was that I could explain the thingie in English, and didn't really have to explain it in Malay because most Muslims seem to know about it anyway (but even when they disagree with it, they aren't willing to add their signature to the petition, and I'm a terrible sales person).

Got Nessa to get me two more coffees. Mostly because I talked to this one guy - Muslim, speaking to me in English. He gave me a headache. I have a short attention span, and bad memory, right?

Have you watched those "debates and discussions" stuff on TV3? Where the men who speak in Malay, they have these long "thoughtful" pauses between every other word?

I CANNOT talk to people who do that, because I have difficulties joining up the gaps. He was saying stuff like "And the parliament.........(5 seconds)......it is......(3 seconds)....you know (3 seconds)...you have to.....(5 seconds).....you have to.........address the root......(2 seconds).....of the problem.

Very local tv talkshow, no?

By the time I was done joining up that sentence in my head, he was already saying something else. Basically agreed (in a very roundabout way) that the way the bill was passed that it was unfair, but didn't want to talk about that and wanted some armchair politics on our government. Pfffft.

Throughout the whole thingie, people were calling me and asking me "What are you doing?" and "Where are you?" and "Why aren't we having coffee together?", to which I replied to them all.........."I don't think you'll believe me".

[ I realised later there's actually not much I can do anymore that my friends won't believe ]

Got like ten signatures? Haha.....I'm pretty bad at these stuff.

There were quite a few people taking photographs there. At one point, I was talking to someone....and a camera was pointed at us, and she said "Oh, say cheese". I was kinda thrown off guard (basically because I hate talking to people I don't know, I dislike having my photograph taken, and what the hell am I doing here giving out leaflets, and this woman wants me to smile for the camera.....). I think the smile I threw looked like I was having diarrhea.

Turns out the photographer knows Bernice. And she'd read my blog before. I actually asked her if she was one of those weird Bernice stalkers, but she said no, she works with Bernice. On what? Stuff. Okay...Get use to the idea that these people seem to be here and there.

I told Nessa that it turns out quite a few people know Tei. Loudmouth immediately pipes up (loudly, might I add), "Are they all lesbians?". Like no, shut up, no one is gay just cause they know Tei (that would be unfair because Tei knows a lot of people anyway, jesus, not just gay people how freaky would that be?).
Told her to stop assuming just by Tei association. She said it wasn't an assumption because she'd asked first. I asked if it was a question, or if she just wanted confirmation on an assumption. She told me to shut up. Hah, very good.

Nessa really likes Chee because he noticed her skirt and complimented her on it. She said no one ever notices stuff like that, or compliments her on what she wears. It's a homemade skirt, see. So Chee just about made a Grade A1 performance.

Nessa insists Chee looks like CJ. Well....they're both Chinese, male and wear spectacles..........................

At the end of it, few hours later, I was pretty lightheaded - I figured it must be coffee deprivation. My mother says, for any illness, take two panadols and go to sleep. I always say, take two coffees you'll probably feel better.

[ And that's not good because it just makes me feel jittery and stops my nose from running but I don't think I actually feel better. So it's a good thing I didn't take up studying medicine then? ]

Jac said something along the lines of thanks for coming, even if you'd probably never show up again for any of these things....hahahahhaha. I was quite amused by that.

I can't believe they actually do these demonstrations and petitions thing regularly -_-". Isn't there some place where they can just stick up a petition and people go sign it if they want?

[ Of course, that's assuming people will go out of their way to do stuff llike that if it isn't shoved in their faces ]

And yknow, in the end, I didn't get any pictures. Hah. Spared the Katagender crowd my natural ability to make everyone look bad in a photo.



Realised later at Nando's that I probably had a fever. Hah. I'm terrible at telling. Nessa had a burger. Took a photo of her holding up the leaflet - the last time I took a photo of her was in Nando's too, my, aren't we creatures of habit.

Hurried home, got into car with uncle and his girlfriend, off for dinner with my family. Pecked at the food. Got into car. Got carsick.

And the thing about me is, if I have a fever, and get carsick, my fever rockets up like nobody's business. Which it did. By the time I got out of the car, I was so incredibly nauseous and dizzy I thought I would hurl at the gate - and was vaguely concerned about the direction to hurl in because my uncle keeps catfish in the drains (I don't know why) and I was wondering if vomit would kill them.

Stumbled straight for the shelf-cupboard-bed thing, and sprawled on it. I was too dizzy to tell anyone that I was sick, and my lips felt glued together. I waited a while, as my aunts and mom chattered around me, the noise making it worse everytime I paid attention.

Eventually, they stopped talking for a while, I gathered myself up, found two Panadols, and somehow got into bed. Mom asked me something a few times, and I tried to reply, but she didn't understand what I was saying.

[ Like I said, coherency is not my strong point ]

Apparently, I sent some retarded smses before I slept.
Apparently, almost could not be deciphered. I dont know, I guess I should have typed them out with my eyes open. Or just not type them when I'm sick.

And I woke up in about 6 hours. Bah. Still have a slight fever too.

[ Have finally determined that my swaying head the last two days was not caused by caffeine deprivation (when was the last time I was deprived of it anyway? I drink it on average six times a day), or caffeine overdosage (more likely), but the bloody fever ]

Mmmm. Just got an email from Rach. She's back in London, and gonna do a masters in...some history of art subject thingie (sorry babes, yknow my memory is rather bad). Ah, there goes the only friend I have who talks about pretty gay boys and Anais Nin porn literature with me.

And now I'm gonna try to sleep again. By the way, just so you know, I have diarrhea. Fucking Thai food, I tell you.

So yeah. That was my Sunday.

Is it just me, or does this happen to you people too?

=====

I finally checked my referals *properly* today. But didn't find what I thought I would.

And no, this entry is bloody long enough (you should know if you're already here, unless you scrolled past you lil cheat), I'm not fucking spellchecking or whatever.

Hah, doesn't that sound like I actually bother to on other days?

Written by lainie at 02:40 PM on January 9, 2006 in Rants.

Cops ‘grope’ daughter's buttocks, throw mum in jail.

I was gonna take a deep breath to calm down, but decided against it in case I'm gonna end up hyperventilating for ten minutes.

Written by lainie at 01:03 AM on January 10, 2006.

Too sleepy to blog. Something to amuse, ganked off the forums (ie: not written by me):

=====

TO:
*******
"adam@hmetro.com.my" , "ali@hmetro.com.my" , "asri@hmetro.com.my" , "azahar@hmetro.com.my" , "azami@hmetro.com.my" , "badrul@hmetro.com.my" , "bairi@hmetro.com.my" , "bidin@hmetro.com.my" , "hafifi@hmetro.com.my" , "joe@hmetro.com.my" , "khalidamin@hmetro.com.my" , "khalidyasin@hmetro.com.my" , "lann@hmetro.com.my" , "mus@hmetro.com.my" , "nasir@hmetro.com.my" , "noorsham@hmetro.com.my" , "sfmohd@hmetro.com.my" , "shukk@hmetro.com.my" , "yaacob@hmetro.com.my"
********

Tuan/Puan,

Saya dapat maklumat risikan yang menunjukkan bahawa ada sekumpulan orang memakai jubah (mungkin ada yang hitam) akan mengadakan upacara sembelihan kambing (mungkin ada yang hitam) dan kemungkinan juga lembu (mungkin ada yang hitam) dan unta (biasanya kelabu - hampir hitam) pada Selasa, 10 Januari 2006 di tempat-tempat berikut:

1) Masjid Shah Alam

2) Masjid Negara

dan beberapa tempat-tempat lain.

Saya rasa mereka tiada mempunyai permit atau lesen untuk berkumpul.

Saya harap pihak Harian Metro akan berkerjasama untuk membentras kegiatan penyembelihan haiwan-haiwan hitam (dan separa hitam).

Sekian Terimakasih,

Anti Black Metal Fan

=====

And now, in a language I understand!

Translation taken from Bobjots (who got the Malay version here anyway, so ha ha)

TO:

*******

adam@hmetro.com.my, ali@hmetro.com.my, asri@hmetro.com.my, azahar@hmetro.com.my, azami@hmetro.com.my, badrul@hmetro.com.my, bairi@hmetro.com.my, bidin@hmetro.com.my, hafifi@hmetro.com.my, joe@hmetro.com.my, khalidamin@hmetro.com.my, khalidyasin@hmetro.com.my, lann@hmetro.com.my, mus@hmetro.com.my, nasir@hmetro.com.my, noorsham@hmetro.com.my, sfmohd@hmetro.com.my, shukk@hmetro.com.my, yaacob@hmetro.com.my

********

Sir/Madam,

I have some intelligence that a group of people in robes (some of which are black) will be a ceremony to slaughter goats (some of which are black) and possibly cattle (some of which are also black) and camels (usually grey but almost black) on Tuesday, 10th of January 2006 at the following locations :

1. Shah Alam Mosque

2. National Mosque

and a few more other locations.

I hope Harian Metro will cooperate in clamping down on the activity of wholesale slaughter of black (and semi-black) animals.

Thank you.

Anti Black Metal Fan

==

Seriously though, you guys have a good Tuesday.

I'll be heading back to Ipoh with my mother. Daph, Nessa and co will be heading to Thailand for the Full Moon Party.

Written by lainie at 07:03 PM on January 10, 2006 in Daily Life.

Wow. Things always follow up huh? Now I'm hearing news again, about gender&It stuff.

Google has a scholarship for it: The Google 2006 Anita Borg Scholarship

Things like that make me smile. Whaddya call a techie girl? A "Syster". Oh god.

Mmmm. I'm not that interested in technology (have any of you bloggers seen a trackback to my blog in yours?), but yknow what's kinda cool?

the Ugly Eligatorr. I wanna do childrens' books like that. Especially the last four panels.

And for more Deviantart love, I remembered having seen something like what Katagender did, pasting up fake smiles on their faces, somewhere there...

Hideki's I Can't Smile.

I need to stop stalking the internet so much.

=====

On the bus ride home, my mother napping. I was talking to myself and generally being quite amused by that I was thinking of, grinning my face off.....then as my eyes panned over my mother I realised I'd better stop and hastily sobered down my expression.

I mean....if I'm a mother. And I wake up, to suddenly find my daughter looking at me with this weird expression and big smile......Ohmygod, I'd cross her name off my will before she gets any funny ideas.

=====

Yesterday, I was pottering around at home, convincing Buster that horny as he was he did not need to harass Belle for a jolly humping session. Maybe if I stick a WAO badge on him he'll feel better about it.

Then, I got a call from Iszie, asking if I wanted to go for lunch with her and Zedeck. So fair enough, I needed a drink anyway. Ended up in some vegetarian restaurant in Brickfields.

It's really cool, got murals on the walls. Chat Masala? Turns out that Zedeck knows quite a few of the people I'd been meeting lately, especially the Katagender crew. Ish. Networkers, I tell you.

Halfway through lunch they asked me where Nessa was - I told them KL Sentral, which is supposedly really nearby. They both wanted to meet her (a bit too eagerly....hello, new Nessa stalkers).
I gave Nessa shitty directions so she could occupy herself walking around completely lost (when the restaurant was just down the road from where she was staying).No seriously, we both have a terrible sense of direction anyway....

Gave Iszie this really cool book I read lately Murakami's Sputnik Sweetheart. I'm a lil bit in love with the story. Turns out Iszie likes it and had been standing around Kinokuniya reading some of it too, so good timing ei?

[ I firmly believe, if you enjoy a book heaps you should share it, because books feel sad otherwise ]

After lunch, we piled into Zedeck's car and picked Nessa up. She told me off for giving her directions in the opposite direction of where we were. We went over to Zedeck's home for a lil while - and for some reason he got really REALLY nervous about that. Mmmm.

*shrug*. I figured it was only fair, since he now knows where I stay. Also, isn't it my turn to stalk him back now? Nessa said I'd never find his house by myself (true), Iszie volunteered to get me there anytime I needed help. Hah!

[ But no, I stalk Lola. ]

His house smells nice. Like, someone's been cooking up a storm. Rice and pandan leaves. Nessa and I took a big, appreciative sniff (of the house, not each other) before stepping out again.

Zedeck stayed behind cause he had rehearsals later - Iszie, Nessa and I went for a girl's outing together.

We walked around, had coffee....Discovered we had a lot in common, the three of us, so the laughter count was way up there. Then we went into Toys R' Us, because toyshops are fun. Played with the stuff there, waggled our eyebrows at the phallic shaped toys, put on bunny ear outfits, made bad jokes, pushed buttons on the Darth Vader mask (You underestimate the POWER of the DARK SIDE...hur hur hur hur).

Talking about piercings (all three of us have tongue piercings, and will like more of you people out there to be that much more giving and pierce yours too, thank you) and tattoos. And people we know. We mentioned Walter (cause he's the one who did Nessa's nape piercing twice). So I told Nessa that Joyce knew him. And Iszie knows both Walter and Joyce.

Fucking small world.

Then we went to Zara and MNG. Turns out Iszie has a coat obsession. So she got this really snappy black one. Paid for it. Went to a camera shop just a few doors down.

And this is the shit part....

Iszie had been pickpocketed. Lost cash, ATM card and parking ticket. So the three of us trudged here and there, making reports. Security's camera didn't pick up anything. It was kinda frustrating, really. Felt really bad for her, cause she was really upset.

Told Iszie she has shite luck....I mean. Something awful happens to that woman every single day. EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. My god.

Went for dinner, met up with Daph and co who were back from Kuching. I'd wanted her to buy sago worms, but she had gone to the market late so she didn't. Yknow, when I had introduced Daph and Fip, within 20 minutes Daph was telling farting / shitting stories to Fip.

Within 20 minutes of meeting Iszie, Daph had wanking / farting / shitting stories to tell her. Hah.

Turns out that while they were looking at apes godknowswhere in Kuching, one of them, Doris, took a bit of a shine to Daemo. So this girl ape spread her legs, ogled Daemo, and wanked herself off in front of him, to the dismay of the guide at her......forwardness....

[ I mean, if I walked up to some random person I thought was cute and wanked myself off...............................I'd be wanking a lot in jail ]

Daph's face...oh god. She imitated an orgasmic, pervy ape, and it's not an expression you see on a human face often (and if you have, you're boinking a seriously weird chick).

After dinner, Iszie dropped me home. I can't remember what I did after that.

=====

Came home today

My dog was ecstatic to see me (I was careful not to accidentally wank her off again this time when I gave her a tummy rub).

Singha beer in the fridge.

Perfect right now, will be Thundercats and He Man marathon, followed by many many many episodes of The Nanny and Golden Girls.

Written by lainie at 08:11 PM on January 10, 2006.

And the moral of the story is:

If you can't think of keywords to put in....just don't.

Written by lainie at 12:41 AM on January 11, 2006.

Rapist's Prison Sentence Triggers Outrage.

I threw up. Literally.

And I don't mean literally the way some people seem to abuse that word, I mean I really threw up.

At least the taste is somewhat....distracting me.....from.....*fans face*.

I need a drink.

Written by lainie at 12:03 PM on January 11, 2006.

I had to leave the room last night. It felt like I couldn't be around anyone else for the moment. I cut short conversations on MSN. Switched off phone. Ignored my mother, who wanted to know why I was sleeping so early....and not cleaning up after myself. Left a bit of a mess of cups in her room, I'm afraid.

I think......I've been so caught up in how stupid our media has been lately, and reading to see what annoyances they've been up to.....that I've forgotten.....

I don't avoid the news just because it's stupid. I also avoid it because I can't take what's in there most times. I'm completely wussy in this sense. I admit it, too. I'd forgotten that recently. I don't like what people do to people.

So. Sigh. I absolutely refuse to read the news for the rest of the week.

I don't even know why I reacted so much to it. I mean...I know why...But yknow. I'm not sure why this piece. I'd just heard about a lil girl being raped by some robbers anyway, over Thai food, and after awhile all the dinner went down just fine.

=====

If there's one thing about my temperament you can depend on, is that if I am back in Ipoh, I am stressed out. I can't even type properly right now because I am jabbing the keys so hard I hit the surrounding letters.

Woke up too early. For fucking grocery shopping. AGAIN. Mom put coffee in a thermos mug so I could drink in the car, and be overwhelmingly irritated (and irritating), as opposed to my usual raging maniac stage.

I felt like shit. I looked it too. I was wearing tatty baggy gray shorts. My hair was pointing in directions previosly unassociated with hairstyles. I didn't shower. Or brush my teeth. I glared at people and mothers pulled their childrens away from me.

In Jusco supermarket, generally slouchy and growly. Felt a small hand on the back of my neck. Immediately thought "This hand had better belong to either Shane McCutcheon or someone insanely sexy who wants to take me home (preferably away from Ipoh) and shag". Whipped around. No one there. Looked downwards.

Saw Rach's mom, grinning up at me. OhmyGOD does not begin to cover what I thought. Logan was there too, looking bleary. Made hairwash signals at him - except my hands hovered above my head quite a few inches, because my hair was sticking up quite high. He brightened up immediately, big smile. We're hairwash hos together.

Of course, driving meant the car died on me twice because my father bloody did not fill up the FUCKING gas tank. AGAIN. I didn't even pray the way I do when I'm desperate. I thought up a face for Fate, pointed a threatening huge middle finger at It (and it was disproportionately huge, about the size of the car I was driving), demanding that the car made it to the petrol station because if I had to fucking WALK in the SUN to get to the BLOODY petrol station, I will cab it home, stick a knife in my father, kill myself, and come to whatever spirit world you're in and fucking STAB STAB STAB YOU TOO YOU FUCKER MAKE SURE MY CAR GETS TO THE PETROL STATION.

I don't know. Either Fate was kind, intimidated, or too distracted with fucking up someone else's life to notice my threats, but I got there anyway.

So. Yes. I am....as usual...Irritated.

I hate coming home. People retire in my hometown, did you know? I'll come live here if I want to bloody die young.

Stupid Ipoh. Shitpoh.

GAHHHH ARGHHH KILL KILL KILL!!!

I've already thrown stuff, hit stuff, kicked, screamed, and had all the bad behaviour you'd associate with the brattiest, most slappable 2 year old kid you can find.

Blogging is not therapeutic. Controlling your angry fingers so you can TYPE is....well. NOT FUCKING THERAPEUTIC. but you get used to controlling it.

I am going OUT to meet my FRIENDS so they can exchange looks over lunch at how I am unreasonably angry at the world.

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.................................................

Written by lainie at 10:42 PM on January 12, 2006 in Daily Life.

*******
ENGLISH
*******

"MEDIA TOMB CANDLE LIGHT VIGIL"

A peaceful protest and wake to mourn the death of media/journalistic ethics and a call for a change to responsible journalism.

Date: Saturday, 14 January 2006
Venue: Meet at the foot of the PUTRA LRT station, Bangsar.
Time: 8.30 pm
Contact: 016 904-5205 / 013 243-7092

ACTIVITIES
**********
1. March from PUTRA LRT Bangsar to the NEW STRAITS TIMES (NST) - HARIAN METRO offices at Jalan Riong.
2. Gathering and lighting candles in front of the NST offices.
3. Performances - street theater, poetry, spoken word and anything else you thing may be relevant.

PLEASE NOTE
***********
1. Please wear black attire
2. Please bring a candle and mineral water bottle to be used as a candle stand.
3. Please bring banners, placards, puppets, musical instruments to convey the message.
4. All are invited to jam, read poetry, perform street theater etc.
5. There shall be a meeting before this event at UBU Bangsar the night before, Friday 13 Jan 2006 at 8:00 pm


"PUSARA MEDIA CANDLE LIGHT VIGIL"

Satu acara berkabung dan protes aman atas kematian etika media/journalis dalam melaksanakan tukar dan melaporkan berita-berita yang beranalisis kukuh dan benar.

Tarikh: 14 January 2006 (Sabtu)
Tempat: Berkumpul di kawasan bawah stesen PUTRA LRT Bangsar.
Masa: 8.30 malam (masa berkumpul)
Kontak: 016 904-5205 / 013 243-7092

AKTIVITI:
*********
1. Berarak daripada PUTRA LRT Bangsar ke bangunan pejabat NEWS STRAITS TIMES (NST) - Harian Metro di Jalan Riong, Bangsar.
2. Berkumpul dan menyalakan lilin di hadapan pejabat NST.
3. Persembahan - teater jalanan, sajak, speech dan aksi-aksi yang dirasakan patut.

PERHATIAN/PERINGATAN:
*********************
1. Sila berpakaian hitam.
2. Sila bawa lilin dan botol mineral sebagai tapak lilin.
3. Sila bawa banner, placard, puppets, musical instruments sendiri dengan mesej yang sesuai.
4. Semua orang boleh participate untuk baca puisi, street teater dan persembahan yang lain.
5. Perjumpaan/meeting sebelum acara di UBU Bangsar pada hari Jumaat 13/01/2006, pada pukul 8:00 malam.

=====

Media & Black Metal in Malaysia is NOT the ONLY issue, but hey, one of em.

Written by lainie at 11:38 PM on January 12, 2006 in Daily Life, Friends.

Something from my email:

Dearest Friends,

Islamic Family Law in Malaysia today is discriminatory and unacceptable. Although it hurts Muslim women the most, each one of us stands to feel its adverse impact. Don't wait for it to happen.

So many people are outraged by the current Islamic Family Law, and a movement is gathering to voice our objections to this law. Please take a few minutes of your time to sign this petition. It doesnt matter what race, creed, belief, gender or age you are - only that you believe in Justice, and are concerned about our country.

Please visit the link below and add your voice to a growing movement for equality in Malaysia today.

As a Malaysian citizen, you have a voice - speak out for justice!

1. The link for the petition on-line is

http://new.petitiononline.com/iflmsia/petition.html [ Sign Petition Here ]

(Those of you who have websites and would like to promote this petition, please give them this address)

2. If you would like an email address to communicate with, the address for this petition is


iflpetition@gmail.com.


Please send the petition on.

Thank you.

====

*takes deep breath*

*Wiggles fingers in front of your face*

If you are Malaysian.....and you think the dicking about of the recent IFL is a no-no....

*wiggles fingers in front of your face*


You are getting sleepy.......

You will sign this petition now, before reading the rest of this blog post....
You will sign this petition now, before reading the rest of this blog post....
You will sign this petition now, before reading the rest of this blog post....
You will sign this petition now, before reading the rest of this blog post....
You will sign this petition now, before reading the rest of this blog post....


You will sign this petition , then tell your friends about it.....

You will buy Lainie a cup of coffee the next time you meet her....

Oh and you happy people from Google stalking "Lainie's hot lecturer" and "Bernice Chauly" and "mulutmata", I'd say, sign the petition. And yes, if you check the petition, my name will be there. You think I'd preach so easily if I didn't practice a lil bit too?

So add yours too. Oh, and thanks.

======

Anyway, apologies for high levels of pissiness from previous blog post, I am now much, muuuuuuch calmer.

Met up with Risha. I thought I'd straightened my face out before meeting her, and it usually works on other people, but she just took one look and said "Okay, what's wrong?". Regardless, she had me giggling my balls off in about twenty minutes. Full-on, stomach cramping, face flushing, breath heaving giggles.

She brought me and Rano to her sister's place - and we babysat her two young nieces. This, is a vast improvement from when I used to be warned to keep my contagious gay vibes to myself, just in case my super gay hormones in the air gay-ify toddlers.

Diya, the younger one, has only one volume setting. LOUD. Monotonous and loud. It's kinda cute, solely because it's like listening to a loud confused young female robot.

Shania, being the older one, took turns bossing us over, with a ruler, "rope", and many orders. We forsee a bright shiny career in S&M for this one.

She tied me and Rano up with measuring tape, so the two of us are practically married now, under the tribe of Uk*clickclick*garito*cluck*, of Boga Boga, at 17cm and 34cm. We had to take an "X-Ray", which would hurt a lot.

The kids' idea of X-ray preparation included massaging oils into our arms and legs so the images would show up on the 'camera'. Hey man, no arguments here. You go right ahead and make sure I get my free X-ray massage.

I told Rano, as my Measuring Tape Wife, she was to go make me dinner, and I want lamb. She told me to bring one back on a spear and she'd consider it. Fucking women, I tell you, no idea where they stand in society.

I had trouble controlling Diya, who insists on drawing on her keropok before she eats them. As is, cheap purple marker, she'll uncap it, scribble all sorts of stuff on the keropok she's holding, and as you yell "NOOOOO" and try to grab marker / fish keropok, she'll throw you that very naughty grin and swallow it immediately.

[ Keropok - crackers. In this case, crunchy, yummy, salty fish crackers ]

I briefly considered inducing vomit - but remembered my last vomit session (not too hard, really, it was just last night), and decided I would rather have purple toxic fish crackers than throw up.

Of course, I was slightly balancing on the ambivalence of worried (toxic crackers?)/ blase (hey, she's not dead yet) by the sixth purple cracker Diya ate. Yknow, kids can surprise you sometimes, you'd think they die easily or break their heads running into cupboards, the fuss some of the safety-precaution stuff you see in Toys R' Us seem to make.

But hey, kids are fuckin resilient lil things. Look at me, bumped my head god knows how many times running full speed into cupboards, walls, doors, till I was old enough to figure out Giant Flat Surface Approaching At Top Speed = Start Braking.

Uh...............................People usually don't let me babysit because I'm not entirely sure exactly how much I should let kids get away with. Besides, like Wanda Sykes says, "They're not my kids!".

Then I rounded up the night with Prita and Rano, watching "The Family Stone". After that fluffy lil movie, we sat on the couch yakking away.

Mmm. Talked mostly about sexuality - I told them, compared to most guys, girls seem VERY open to experimenting. By willing to experiment, "bi-curious", I don't mean "bi-sexual". To be honest, EVERY girl I've ever talked to about sexuality, from the moment they find out I've been dating Fip, and that somehow seems like a gateway for them to open up.......yknow. They're all curious.

Some have been attracted to girls before - but consider themselves straight.

But in the end....they've ALL either experimented, or are considering it (whether or not they ever get around to it, I don't know lah). Most, have at least kissed another girl before.

What they usually want to know about, is gender roles. As in, who's the top / bottom / bitch / butch of the relationship. Like...who's the cuddler, who's the cuddlee.

We had a fun time as I told them about labels in the gay community (femme, butch, soft butch, andro, andro-femme, macho mary, yada yada....)...and discussing who looked like what category. I told Rano and Prits, even if Prits is the more daring of the two of them, lesbians would....I guess......probably hit on Rano more.

Because one thing gay girls seem to do when discussing a straight girl, is judge how "swingable" she is. And the vibe off Rano is more "swingable" than Prits (even though, as their friend, I'd have to say Prits is more spontaneous and daring).

I don't even know why I'm blogging about this. I guess in my head, the whole world's a lot more gay than it looks.

Rano left at 2am. Prits and I continued chit chatting up till 4am about relationships and people and gayism and biism and godknowswhatelse.

So yeah. Been hanging out with friends. And I'm much happier to be home now.

Oh, and if we had a car this afternoon, I'd be blogging that I have a new tattoo by now. But I don't.

Reading up on China's "Bamboo Network" thingies now. Anyone got links to share?

Written by lainie at 07:47 PM on January 13, 2006 in Daily Life.

Katagender has been updated with the photos and thingies. I haven't had time to check it out yet (though my mom did stare cause I laughed at the photos I briefly saw) but ack that reminds me I'm supposed to call Jac and ask her something.

I was awaken this morning (VERY EARLY) by multiple smses 'congratulating' me for the IFL gazetting being put on hold thingie. I don't know why I'm being congratulated, what the hell did I do?

Anyhow, we shall see how it goes. Mmmphm, pardon caution / cynicism as I wait.

=====

My biggest concern right now, is when the hell am I gonna thread my eyebrows? I'd like to have more than one, thank you.

Oh. And I'm considering a haircut. Something that will preferably piss my dad off. Just kidding. My concept is: Hair grows all the time, but Chinese New Year only comes once a year. So. What better time to do something stupid to my hair, than when my entire extended family will see it?

I think I prefer having long hair. So if I'm gonna have something short, it might as well be useful and make me giggle.

But seriously. I'd like to colour my hair too. The only thing is, I once told myself that I would try not to colour my hair the same colour twice - short of purple, green or pink (I'm never doing blond, don't ask why), I've basically run out of colours. And I don't want the colours that remain.

Maybe colour it red, in the spirit of Gongxifacai. You have no idea how tempted I am by that idea because my mom said something this afternoon...."Your aunts are compl....saying...that you like all these Indian stuff"....

What the hell is that supposed to mean anyway? I told her off, damn if I'm going to put up with any racist crap from my own family. I didn't hear any bloody complains when I was going through the Thai phase (actually, I can't really remember if they saw my face during that phase, I might have just been in Cyberjaya all through that).

Speaking of Chinese New Year.....People keep asking me when it is. Jesus I don't fricking know, I'm at the generation / marriage status / age where the only thing I have to worry about during CNY is

1) pockets to carry my angpows
2) remember Chinese titles for random uncles / aunts / grands / great grands / pseudo granduncle's young girlfriend's brother kinda stuff.
3) don't wear black / dark colours
4) sharpen up chopstick kung fu so I too, can skillfully toss yee sang onto someone's ceiling.
5) eating too many mandarin oranges, and suffering the consequences.
6) bleeding eardrums if my neighbours don't stop blaring those gongxifacai songs sung by children in bad pink costumes.

To be honest, I don't know when it is, but it must be soon because all the mall workers seem EXTRA grumpy from the last minute shopping and endless Gongxifacai songs playing on the mall's stereos. Fuck, I'd be grouchy too if I heard the bad music all day.

====

I had this conversation with my dad, in the car:

Dad: What is this.....black metal thing.
Lainie: It's nothing. Media fucking up and around. It wasn't even black metal.
Dad: Well...Girl, you must be smart and learn to
Lainie: Don't finish that sentence.
Dad: I'm just saying that
Lainie: Don't finish that sentence.
Dad: You should know when to
Lainie: I am telling you, if you finish that sentence, we will definitely wind up having a big argument (because it'll piss me off and I won't bother keeping my trap shut).

Sigh. Let's just say I could sense what was coming up and was in no way in the mood for it.

If I get arrested for attending a punk rock gig, and somehow end up accused for being a Satanist at a Black Metal gig (which I will listen to anyway if I damn well want), I do NOT want to have any memories whatsoever of a conversation where I was told that if I know they're a group subjugated against I should immediately distance myself from them, regardless of what I think is right, for self-preservation.

I'm......not like that.

Is this the attitude we're suppose to evolve into? Or do you reckon this is the very outlier behaviour that evolution would breed out? Not sure if it even applies, and I don't really care anyway, long as I'm doing what I like .

=====

Being back in Ipoh means I listen to jibes / remarks about my lack of cooking abilities. The fact is this: I am a cook with no natural ability for anything beyond turning something raw into something burnt.

I really don't see WHY I should inflict my terrible cooking skills on the world just cause I have a vagina. Do my breasts hold the goddamn skillet? Fucking NO. It's probably easier on me to make babies than pancakes.

Yeesh.

====

Brokeback Mountain won't be screening in Malaysia, which is, you know, totally taking me by surprise. Uhuh.

Anyhoo, Lola has recently found out her crush is unavailable (that darling boy), so. Lola. *Waggles eyebrows*. When are we going for a drink?

[ Because I am just asking KA to kick my ass ]

Media Tomb Candlelight Vigil - there is a 20% chance of me being there.

Sorry I've been terrible with emails / comments, I come home, blog, and I go out again soo....

Kiss kisss

Argh, I am running so late it's not funny!

Rush rush rush

Written by lainie at 11:20 AM on January 16, 2006 in Daily Life, Friends.

Typing in my room, cause I came home and wasn't allowed to go on the net (mom wanted to sleep). Loooooooong blog post. Mmm. I know a lot of you guys don't like it when I ramble. Well. Too bad.

=====

I cut my hair yet again. Faux hawk. Fo-hawk. It's, I suppose, quite gay (though that's not why I got it)...heh.

This time round dyke haircut is unaccompanied by me freaking out because I actually ASKED for it - it's totally different when you accidentally end up looking butchy because your hairdresser only speaks Mandarin.



I'm not trying to look cute, I just dislike looking directly at cameras when I'm alone.

When I asked for my haircut, the woman said "Oh, you want to look like David Beckham". I gave her a look she successfully understood as "If that's what you're gonna do stay the hell away from my hair".

[ I mean. Boink Beckham, maaaaaaaaybe. Talk to / look like Beckham, no. ]

Rano and Prits kept harping on about how it looked cool, and they'd love to get one, so I told them to get one too then. But they said they didn't have the guts to. *Eyeroll*. Hair GROWS BACK, yknow. I mean, if this was the equivalent of amputating a limb, and I'd be stuck with this hairdo forever, I very much doubt I'd do it.

Besides, it'd be depressing if your level of guts is somehow linked to the length of your hair (especially since I associate lack of hair with baldy old men). Then again, the girls have boyfriends, so I understand. Lots of guys prefer long hair, don't think we don't know. Just one look at all the straight girls out there with the same hairstyle ought to be a big clue on exactly how well we know you boys usually like it.

[ That, and fitting in all the time is apparently not as annoying to other people as it is to me ]

=====

After the haircut, I figured there was just enough time for a lil trip to KL, if I could be bothered to. Tossed a coin, it said yes. Prita freaked on me because she was driving and had to cut across lanes to get on the correct road. So three hours later, there I was. Never disobey the Coin Toss.

Basically, there was a candlelight vigil, but the main thing was that some friends had invited me to a new gay club.

I couldn't remember what I was supposed to bring to the vigil, where or when it was. But I DID remember I needed black clothes. I found out I don't have ANY black clothes in Ipoh. I was going through my tops and all I found were pink, yellow, one white, and a whole lot of happy colours. Finally found ONE navy blue top and wore that instead. Sigh. No one had better die anytime soon in Ipoh, I have no dark clothes to wear.

Dennis called to tell me where the thingie was. Rafil called to say "By the way, they didn't get a permit for the gathering, just a heads up for you". Fantastic, why didn't someone say that BEFORE I cut my hair?

I got to the Bangsar LRT station, walked up to this crowd of five guys, all wearing black.

Lainie: Is this the Jalan Riong thingie?
Group: .............
Lainie: ...uhm?
Group: ............
Lainie: Uh...Okay. Right. Uh. I'm just gonna...*points at another group of black-wearing people*...I'm just gonna leave nowokaybye (OhmyGAWDfreaky).
Group: .......uh.
One guy: Wait. What are you looking for?

[ And it's not like I could remember what the hell the thingie was called at that moment ]

Lainie: Uhm. The Jalan Riong thingie?
Guy: You're looking for the street?
Lainie: No, I'm looking for the people who are going to..uhm..demonstrate at that place

[ And you know, it's a jolly jolly jolly good thing they WERE gonna go for the same vigil thing, and this wasn't just some random group of guys I approached ]

Finally Kecik walked by and saw me, pointed me in the direction of some people at the bus stop. Turned out Jac was there, handing out leaflets to people and speaking in Malay (my, now is that becoming a familiar sight). I think she was briefing them.

Apparently, everytime Jac sees me my hair's shorter. She asked if I was going botak next. Me? Bald? Unlikely, that. I'd have to be very bored. I just realised, I've not talked about my hair so frequently ever since......Ever since....Hmm.

Then Jac noted the heels I was wearing, not exactly something people wear if they might need to run away, I reckon - and sigh. I didn't know till after arriving in KL that this was tecnhically an illegal gathering yah? Not like my running speed differs much between my sneakers and any heels below 2inches anyway. I looked at Jac's shoes, flat, closed toe, obviously still a better practical choice than mine for all the walking (which I ALSO forgot was gonna happen).

[ Actually, don't know why but when I looked at her black shoes something fidgeted / twitched in my mind till I added extra twiddly bits on one toe and heel, then the vision calmed down. That, was so weird. After that I stared at lots of shoes to see if it would happen too. So if you were there and saw me eyeballing your shoes a lot, it's not like I was plannin to steal em or something. I'm still staring at shoes now. ]

Bugged Dennis a lil to get a reminder for what was planned for the night. He gave me this looooooooooooooooooooong list of activist stuff he was involved in. Good grief, if I had to think so much my brains would be fried crispy by now (women can't think too much, or their brains overheat, didn't anyone tell you?).

Dennis told me that if I DID get arrested I'd be out by latest 3am, and I figured fine, that's plenty of time to bunk over at a friend's place, get back to Ipoh the next day. I texted some friends to say sure, I'd love to go clubbing with you later. Don't freak if I just don't show up though.

[ No one worries anymore when I say stuff like that ]

Walked back to ask Jac some stuff (because people keep asking me questions that should go to someone like her instead of someone like me - how many times do I have to say I never know what's happening?).

Lainie: Are you the Jac at APC?

[ That's the email address I have in my inbox, for some reason ]

Jac: Yes
Lainie: Are you the Jac at WAO?

[ That's the one my friend's trying to contact ]

Jac: Yesss...
Lainie: *wryly* You get around too, huh?

Then Jac smiles and said something about being unashamedly, unabashedly feminist / activist. Jesus H *blasphemeblasphemeblaspheme*, woman, I'm not very observant but I'd have to completely moronic to not realise that, I mean...



Nawwwwwww....an activist.....Who woudda thought....mm. *taps lips*. Not me.

Of course, instead of actually answering properly, I just raised an eyebrow and said "Hmmm". Lazy Lainie.

I mean, I'm not sure what else someone could do to further enhance the label.

Wear hippie clothes and do yoga, I guess. Contradict that by drinking coffee, smoking ciggies. Write poetry and sing acoustic / acapella songs (actually, if I recall correctly Jac was reading poetry the night I met her). Show extensive interest in esoteric subjects, eg:history of art / media studies / sociology / philosophy / psychology / obscure literature / undiscovered musicians. Malaysiakini subscription, Kakiseni reader / writer.

Hah...this is actually kinda amusing me. Mmmm. Lessee.

Drink gipsum-free soy milk and be vegetarian. Watch movies with a pen and notepad and jot down opinions and alternative point of views. Dislike labels (Hmmmmmmmm). Annoy family by not doing accountancy or getting married and having babies, but insist on doing things they don't see the point of. Have funny hair. Have lots of friends with funny hair. Watch documentaries. Act in your friend's indie film. Have propaganda material lying around your house.

Be gay. If not gay, experiment. If won't experiment, make up by having lots of liberal, gay friends. Or, just have lots of liberal gay friends. Go to singer songwriter gigs. Get annoyed at religion. Take lomo / BnW photos. Carry stationery with NGO names on the side. Do vibrational medicine / have healing stone / tarot cards / crystal ball / aromatherapy / out of body experiences / trippy drugs.

Okay fine I'll stop, I'll stop.

[ I just realised those paragraphs up there might look like I was talking about Jac - I wasn't lah, I barely know her, however, the description does actually sound like the combination of quite a few of my friends, not any of them activists (except maybe two). Hah, so much for that. *Shrug* ]

CJ and Rafil both cancelled on me because they had dinners to go for (bitchesssssssssss). Before that, CJ sent me this message: "Dunno, all these activist stuff is making me very lesbian". CJ calls himself a male lesbian. I don't have the heart to tell him who a male lesbian really is........

Anyhoo. Turns out the people were standing around all scattered instead of a big group because "we don't want trouble before arriving at the Harian Metro office". Which was a bit, "What, do we WANT trouble THERE?" for me.

Walked to the Harian Metro office from the LRT station. It kinda got attention from people driving by, one big group of people walking together, dressed in black.

Got there, some candles were lit up, handed around. Posters / signs were too. I got handed one, but I passed it to someone else. At first I didn't want to hold onto a poster, because wax was dribbling all over my right hand and I needed to deal with it.

There I am, all that wax dribbling over all those people.....I mean. Wax is sexy. It'd be so much cooler if it was an orgy or weird cult ritual or something. But we were there to mourn the death of media ethics. Stupid Harian Metro. THIS COULD HAVE BEEN AN ORGY INSTEAD!!. Lets not encourage the papers.

Paul (of Paul's Place) showed up with two dogs. Few people remarked along the lines of "Wot, no goats?" (including me, because I am sooo original). I petted one of them, and noticed after I withdrew my hand that it was covered in fur. FUUUUUCK.

I'm allergic to dogs, by the way. ESPECIALLY the kind with loose fur. I'm such a dumbass, I know.

Was smacking my palm against my jeans trying to get it off, as I walked away to the other end, far from the dogs as I could. Got another poster handed to me. My god, but did the posters smell nice. Fresh paint, mmmmmm. I can't remember what mine said. But mmm, it smelled good. I made CK smell it too. He didn't get it.

I vaguely protested against holding the poster (because I could FEEL my nose getting itchy just at that moment and I needed to rub my nose) but yeah that didn't really work.

Not entirely a bad thing because then I looked up and saw all the cameras - I KNOW how naff I look when I rub my nose and goddamn if there are gonna be ANY more blackmail photos of me doing that. So I just kinda spaced out from my own nose and kept my hands on the poster / candle. Every so often, hot wax dropped on my fingers.

Someone said something I didn't catch, because I was still figuring out the whole nose-thing. Then I looked up, and Jac was on my right giving me this "Well?" kinda look-nod in the direction of the line of guys holding up candles and posters.

Lainie: ? (does what was just said concern me?)
Jac: *gestures with head*
Lainie: What?

[ Looks to left at row of people holding candles and posters ]
[ Looks down at self holding candle and poster ]
[ Click-click-click-click-dengdengdeng!!!! ]

Lainie: Oh.

So I shuffled about two feet to the left and stood with the rest of them. -_-" I think Dennis and Jac must be under the impression that I'm veeeeeeeeeery blur because everytime I'm in front of them I don't seem to be paying attention..................

[ Although Dennis teasing me over my awful sense of direction is unfair, dammit, no one in my family knows where ANYTHING is, it's bloody hereditary, I tell you ]

Held up poster and candle, along with a whole row of people. A guy stepped up and said some stuff, Jac read a press statement (I lost track after two thirds because it was looooong, and entirely in Malay, and I couldn't translate fast enough to keep up and got a bit confused- but, tried lah. Tried.).

[ Gah, I really need to buck up on my Canto and Malay. And imagine, this is my Malay after it's vast improvement because of all my Malay classmates at Cenfad. ]

As the cameras went off, I thought it would be funny if my mother, who still had not seen my new haircut yet, saw it in the papers before she saw me. At a protest. Wonderful.

Not that I saw any press there? But I wasn't paying attention.

Some guy with a guitar singing a song dedicated to the death of media ethics. I look up at the street sign I'm leaning against, and am startled to find that my waxed-up hair had probably been that lil itty bitty bit away from a candle's flame.

And to think, I laughed when Dennis warned me not to set anyone, including myself, on fire, because how on earth could anyone be that stupid, have a lil faith in me, yo.

2 minutes silence. Then flowers were handed out. I wasn't very sure why we were given flowers so I asked Jac what we were doing.

Jac: Mourning the death of media ethics.

Oi.

I meant the flowers, dammit, the flowers! Turns out we were putting flowers down in front of some plaque thingie, like a funeral for a dead person. And here I was wondering before that if I should wear some in my hair (seriously). The only thing that stopped me was that there were many guys holding lots of flowers, and I couldn't imagine quite a few of them wearing that.

There was some singing we were all supposed to do. CK asked me if I had any idea what they were singing (he's the only guy I know of who ever asks me if I know what's happening). We just waited till the song was over.

CK suggested, with this big grin on his face, that I follow Jac and the feminists around more, and get to know more feminists.

Lainie: Whyyyy....?
CK: They do good work.
Lainie: Andddd........?
CK: *grins* they do good work.
Lainie: And I don't suppose this is like CJ trying to get me to eventually meet more feminists because he thinks they're lesbians so he can meet them too?
CK: Naw, I wouldn't say that.
Lainie: Uhuh.
CK: *grins* but you should hang out with feminists more.

[ Why do people always assume feminist = lesbian = feminist anyway? ]
[ Or did I miss what CK was trying to say? ]
[ Then again, this is the guy who likes to touch my tongue ring because that's "touching two girls at one go" so..... ]

Then they gathered up their stuff, and walked back to Bangsar LRT. CK offered me a lift to Bangsar where my friends were, so I didn't walk back to the station.

And so, that was one night of demonstration over.

=====

[ Interesting, everytime Iszie messages me, my USB mouse disconnects briefly...... ]

=====

Got my arse to La Bodega. Had a drink with some friends there, then later on went to the new lesbian club called Enigma in Taman Desa with Tei and Kat (apparently, no men allowed - though we did see ONE, unless he's the most successful crossdresser of the lot).

I'd been told earlier that it was a very femmy-club. BALLS. Balls balls balls balls BALLS.

Within ten minutes of entering the club Tei and I wanted to grow our hair long and wear dresses. Hah. Tei has a new haircut, curly crop with red streaks. Very dyke-y too, but I out-dyked her with my hair. . Tei's new hair looks cool. Very stylish.

Tei: Look at your hair! I like it!

[ Pause ]

Tei: You just had to get this lah?

Well. The club was like short-hair land. So many people closer to the butch end of the scale. Tei remarked that if she'd wanted to see that we'd have gone to a straight club to look at men. The voices there were loud, and boyish. Could barely hear each other talk.

We were sipping our drinks when some drama happened at the table behind Kat (well, I guess so many lesbians in such a small place would be a fabulous brewing place for drama). It was entirely in Cantonese, so I translated to Tei, and we giggled our way through the entire scene. And our group acted out our own lesbian drama fight in slow-mo (it's a good thing we didn't get whacked). I was being so nosy and entertained.

Basically. Tall Butch and Femme are fighting. Tall Butch demands that Femme acknowledges their relationship, which had lasted a year. TB shouts loudly, and pushes Femme. Short Butch to the rescue! Short Butch steps in between, and pushes TB. TB glares at her (him?) like a lil ant, and yells. Short Butch yells back at TB. Glaring showdown.

Tei and I wait for the butches to cry. Doesn't happen. Damn.

Femme hides behind SB. SB tells TB that she had no bloody business hitting Femme girl. Oooh. Physical abuse has happened in the relationship then? Scandal. Then, SB tops off the irony by putting her hand on TB's throat and asking her if she thought she was so bloody special to be able to hit girls.

Oi, violence against women. See, who said lesbians are feminists? Tsk tsk, CK, CJ, tsk tsk.

Tei and I wait for the butches to cry. Doesn't happen. Damn. Mimicking of the fight ensues from our table.

Femme jumps between two butches this time. Then just as it gets seriously, seriously tense, some joker middle of nowhere, jumps between them, and starts SINGING. And I am serious when I say that this actually breaks up the fight.

What the fuck man. I felt so cheated. I was gonna see a lesbian bar brawl, and it was cut short because some woman jumped in the middle and broke out into song?? Booooo! Owner of the bar comes along, with alcohol, and tells the femme not to be born so beautiful in her next lifetime.

Cue raised eyebrows from my table. Wow, now THAT is frickin opportunistic lesbianism.

Tei's friend, Angie, joined us after that. When Angie walked in I did a forehead slap because she's this lil, lil woman, and she's dressed all femmy (plus, she's quite hot), and as she trotted over to our table with her big, big smile, I thought she'd get pounced on or something.

We played the drinking game Never Ever. I call it the Kantoi Yourself game, because that's what I do. I always forget that I've done something, then when I say I've Never Ever, I end up drinking too. But mmmmm. Never Ever is a good way to find out what stupid things your friends have done.

I realised I'd forgotten to eat dinner, so at 3something in the morning, after all that travel to KL, walking around for the demonstration, and drinking, I went for a meal.

Tei: Hey, next time you hear about one of these protest things, tell me I wanna go.
Lainie: Okay......... What do you want to protest against?
Tei: I don't know, anything, I just wanna protest.
Lainie: .....................(dumbass).....

[ Hell, don't blame me if you end up outside the National Zoo protesting for more rabbits.]

Lainie: You're NOT going there just to check out chicks, right?

[ Because tonight's thing had wayyyyy more guys than girls, and I'm pretty sure if anyone finds out you're there for some social party it might get a bit....uhm. Well. ]

Tei: No lah, I just wanna protest. See what it's like.

[ Oh well, if you insist. Never let it be said that I stopped you from boinking any girl. Or protesting. ]

=====

The next day, met up with more friends.



Yes, I know exactly how..... fantastic ....I look in that photo. Let's just say I was banned from putting the other photo because she looks like she's possessed.

We talked / complained a lil bit about that book, I told her about the night before, including the demo thingie. Then, we were off to Bangsar for lunch.

As I walked along some alley, one of them stopped me and said "Lains, shouldn't these signs look familiar to you?"

So I looked up and saw what was the most "WTF Moment" of the day. Graffiti on the wall. Veeeeeeeeeery familiar graffiti. So we took pictures. Hah.

Katagender...........*waves warning finger*. Naughty, naughty.





[ I'm assuming that is a symbol of girl power women's rights thingies and....not.....girls....fisting....? Hah, I dig it anyway (the symbol, dears). Why's the fist symbol so popular? These people have not watched the traumatising porn I have, I gather? ]

=====

Visited aunt briefly. She tactfully said my hair was cheeky, fun and....pointy. What she actually said to my mother over the phone, I don't know.

Actually, I'm still not used to the sight of my short hair in the mirror. My heart skipped a beat the last time I walked past one because I was shocked. But heyyyy, plenty of time to get used to it.

Hopped on a bus and came home. Attracted lots of stares - Jesus, people, it's just hair. After a minute or so you can start blinking again.

Mom called me as I was on the way home, to ask how I dared go to KL. My LIFE is in KL, goddammit. Ipoh drives me nuts. Arrived home, and upon setting her eyes on me, mom demanded why I got such an ugly haircut. This, is actually not as bad as what I was expecting.

Mom said a few things to me, mostly connected with me not fitting into whatever image she has that a daughter should be. .

Amongst that is, my uncle had been so fed up with me that he'd told my aunt to lock me out of the house. Twice. Siiiiiiiigh. That, was news to me. I don't get why he didn't just talk to me or tell me off or something. Just...locked me out? What, was I supposed to "learn a lesson"? Hell no, I thought you guys just unintentionally locked me out, not maliciously.

I don't know about you guys, but I mostly feel disconnected from family these days, mostly because they're the ones who most readily judge me, behind my back. I mean, they're family and I like them (and thought I get along with them)....but. Yknow.

Whatever I do that they don't like, they mostly just build it up, and by the time they've unleashed it on me, it's like the floodgates opening.

And yet, here I am, getting haircuts I know will piss them off .

Tralalalala

=====

I just checked my email. OHMYGOD this is going to take fricking forever......

[ Update: I am NOT a part of Katagender, for goodness' sake, stop asking about me there. ]

Written by lainie at 12:15 PM on January 16, 2006.

My mother has taken to laughing at me (sometimes pointing) everytime some dude with pointy hair shows up on her Chinese tv shows.

====

My mom said once, that if I was smart I'd do what Gazel did, and move out of the country because at least there isn't institutionalised racism there. And if I have children, at least they'd stand get a better education, more rights, this and that, this and that.

And I can't admit that hasn't crossed my mind before.

But seriously though, if everyone who wants a better life just moves out of the country....who stays behind to make things better? Not that I'm doing much, but it seems a bit drastic to say "Fuck you I've had enough" to an entire country and leave for Australia / Canada.

Written by lainie at 05:31 PM on January 16, 2006 in Family, Stupid, but fun..

This is the coolest thing I've ever read on the internet, everyone seems to be blogging about it.

=====

And in the midst of me arguing that it's unfair that I am expected have to keep long hair just cause I'm a girl......

N Korea wages war on long hair.

It stressed the "negative effects" of long hair on "human intelligence development", noting that long hair "consumes a great deal of nutrition" and could thus rob the brain of energy.

Haha! Poor dudes. I'm trying to feel some pity for them, but I can't focus because I'm giggling too much (thought it was a hoax when I saw it on Boing Boing).

I forget that not only do girls have to be girls, boys have to be boys too.

Ah, ya hear that you bastardly lil hooligan males, CHOP YOUR HAIR OFF! We need to have some nice, clear, obvious differences between men and women here.

Also, long hair saps brain energies, but I guess these nice people are saying women don't need to cut their hair too because they have the brain energy to spare?

Why are words like "Brain Energy" appearing in my blog? Sigh.

====

and my mother, with her excellent timing, just piped up that with this hairstyle, I'd better get myself some nice earrings or I'll end up looking like a boy.

Well. You know, I HAD been shopping for earrings the past three days, but now I'm feeling too stubborn. So there.

Written by lainie at 11:26 PM on January 16, 2006 in Daily Life.

Happiness is realising Bruno is BACK! Bruno is about my favourite online comic character, along with Davan (Something Positive) and Helen (Sweetheart of the Internet).

Aaaah. Aaaah. It didn't work out between Bruno and Gina. Didn't see it happening anyway (some people have soap operas, I have Bruno's dramatic life, melancholy and over-worked brains).

No....NO...They did not just foist some pseudo motherhood on Helen by making a Helen-clone....I give the clone two more weeks of existence before Helen creates some cool techy way to make the problem go away.

=====

I forgot to mention. Julian, my cousin, became a dad recently. Which makes me an aunt, kinda. To lil Jayden Yeoh.

This, I believe, in the Yeoh-Lim family tree, puts us a generation ahead of the slow breeders over at the Lim side again. Nyeh nyeh, nyeh nyeh?

[ Because if my family can't be proud of anything, might as well fall back on proof that our side can make babies faster ]

Speaking of Lim family. I hear that Si Howe is back. Oi, uncle, you're supposed to call and blackmail me into taking you out for drinks or something, right? Apa jadi? Oh well.

=====

Sigh. I'm off to KL tomorrow because I need to get my fucking driving license slip on my mother's orders.

Am. Bloody. Ticked. Off.

I've hardly been seeing Risha. It's her birthday tomorrow.

I was supposed to spend some time with her tonight. I knew she was on the way to pick me up, so a phone call from her, when she wasn't outside my house with some assy quip, was the first major sign that something was wrong, so I didn't bother with the Hellos.

Lainie: Oh no, what are you going to say?
Risha: What time are you leaving for KL tomorrow?
Lainie: Awww....Rishaaa. Now what?
Risha: I can't come out tonight, my dad is chucking a fit.
Lainie: What? Now? I've hardly seen you since you've been back!
Risha: I know, I'm already halfway to your house, but he wants me home.
Lainie: Why can't you come out anyway?
Risha: "Is this the time for a good girl to be out, bla bla bla"
Lainie: What...the hell....I'm not going to see you before you go off!

[ She's off to Australia on the 20th ]

Risha: I'm sorry...meet for breakfast tomorrow?
Lainie: Sigh. Okay. What time.
Risha: 9am?
Lainie: Man, I'm gonna see you that lil bit then go off to KL?
Risha: Sorry. I have to get home.
Lainie: It's okay then...I'll see you tomorrow.

Sigh. She's my best friend. And she's been spending so much time with family I've barely seen her. And now that it's her last few days, she'll STILL be spending time with her family.

Fucking blows. I mean. And it's not like Risha ever gets up to anything. If she was really the wildchild people seem to think she is, you honestly think she'd be spending her birthday here in Ipoh? Sigh. SIGH.

I think it's showing on my face because my mother's taken the hint and is not saying stupid stuff about my hair now.

And I finally waxed up my hair today too, so she could freak over my hairdo. My best friend's the most homophobic person I know, ironic, innit?

But she's learning to deal - slo-o-ooooo-wly. Heh. Deal with it, bai, deal with it.

=====

Right. I'm off to catch up on my reading list, I have about twenty books to read. Yes I know I blog a lot. Shush.

Written by lainie at 04:46 PM on January 18, 2006 in Rants.

People, no time past few days to surf / check emails / comments, will get around to that tomorrow. Or soon.

====

Hey. So. What happened to you?

I don't mean how fucked up you've become, I mean, has it been so long since the time when we could say we were friends, that you've forgotten.....If I have something to say, I'd bloody say it to your face?

Do you think the idea of telling you directly, that I think you're a good for nothing bastard, intimidates me? You can forget that now. It's not like I have to say it, you know my opinion of you is at best, dismal.

And you can stop telling your girlfriend that the only reason she stood up for herself was because I was there. I am not churning girl power everywhere I go. If anything, I have restrained myself from saying too much - and really, you don't even fucking deserve that.

You've stepped all over her so many times, that you really expect her to be totally defeated don't you? You expect her to take all your stupid shit - because in your words, "the world accomodates you". Because, she's one girl, in a man's world, and there's nothing she can change so she should just take it, take it, take it. Because that's how you were raised.

I have news for you - you're not supposed to stop maturing after leaving the home you grew up in. There comes a point where you need to realise that you're not supposed to stop improving yourself as a person. You're just being bloody lazy - "that's how I was raised" is a terrible excuse for being a dickhead (and you're just making your bloody fucked up family reputation look even worse).

You're ACTUALLY surprised she told you off. My god. I'm only surprised you haven't been dumped. Well, after such a long time, I can't say I'm surprised. Frustrated is the word.

She's one of the few people I rein my temper in for, because if she tries so, so hard for you, I don't want to be the one who comes along and destroy something that means so much to her. Not when there's nothing my temper can say that she doesn't know.

I am waiting for the day when her actions matches what she knows about the two of you.

In case you're wondering, most times I don't even say anything. Don't have to. She knows you're a bastard. She knows she'd be better off without. She knows she can find better men out there. In a sense, our silence does nothing but show her that there's nothing new for us to say, because it's the same shit from the same asshole all over again. All we do, is wait for the day you fuck off from her life.

All we do, is pick up the pieces and patch up the damage, so she'll have the strength to run into her weaknesses, right back to you. It has gotten to the point sometimes we hesitate to make her feel better, just in case there's a chance you devastate her so much she can actually be convinced to leave you. But we stick around anyway, and try to heal her, because it breaks our hearts to see her that way - something that obviously doesn't affect you the way it does us.

She stood up for herself because you're a nasty lil boy. Jerkwad. Also, you are narcissistic, unreasonable, cruel, judgemental and sadly lacking the intelligence to realise that.

And she's telling the truth - I WAS sleeping when she sent those messages and had no idea what was going on. I don't know what she said to you, but I assure you if I was behind those messages I'd have

1) identified myself
2) been much harsher than she was
3) said it, not typed out entire smses using 12 fiddly lil buttons.

No. Actually, if I was behind her standing up for herself, you'd have been dumped in one sentence and she can get on with her life, without the fanfare of whatever emo -anger smses she was sending out.

It's basically reached the point where if YOU and a terminally ill dog with 3 days to live were in front of a huge rolling boulder, and I had a gun....I'd shoot you in the hopes that your body and ego size will be the sufficient ramp needed for the boulder to fly over the dog. Hell, I'd shoot you to save the dignity of the body of a flattened squirrel-roadkill.

I wish I could literally shoot you to save the dignity of my friend, and get away with it.

I'd tell you to go fuck yourself, but I try not to encourage bestiality. It's only for the sake of a friend I care for that you go unnamed here. You stupid bastard. You have taken a good friend of mine, and fucked her over.

Don't you even dare blame the words here on her, you fucking cowardly, bullying little shit. Don't. I don't care how much you like to avoid stuff, for bloody once, you keep quiet, you sit down, and you think properly where this is coming from. And then you know what? You SIT DOWN, SHUT UP, AND THINK AGAIN. Because you are not thinking enough.

I don't want to hear that you made any stupid accusations that don't make sense again.

You know who has my number. If you really think there's anything that we need to talk over - I'm not the one who's afraid.

Written by lainie at 05:03 PM on January 18, 2006 in Links / Email.

Podcasts, anyone?

NY Comedy Bling is a new podcast set up by Jack, with his friend Div. Go visit it .

It's so weird to hear the voice of the guy in America who's been reading my blog. Lots of cussing there, but if you read this blog it shouldn't be too difficult a thing to stomach for you, hmmm?

=====

Just traveled back to Ipoh, from KL. Baling (Membaling) is an interesting play, one I caught after Iszie called me a ninny for passing up a freebie.

Met some of the Sunway theatre students there. Mmmph, didn't think I'd see them again that soon.

=====

The moment I land in my hometown, I did my email checking - What do I find? An invitation to Lola's birthday.

There will be booze, and her, and her very bribable friends. Why am I in Ipoh again? WHY?

Of course, I now have her home address, so it's not entirely a bad thing. Yes Lola, your stalkee has your home address, what were you thinking?

Stalk, stalk, away!!!!

Also, I will be hinting strongly to KA that if she'd like to add some liquor to her collection, that I will welcome the delivery of an extremely inebriated Lola on my doorstep. Uh. So I can. Uh. Help her sober up.

By the power of Pointy Hair, I will restore her.

They's gonna be good bottles too. So, KA, how about it? You can share it with Kristin. Good deal? Yes? And you can go get whoever you want drunk with that, so the happiness continues.

Written by lainie at 12:24 AM on January 19, 2006 in Friends, Stupid, but fun..

Update:

SOMEBODY, tell me why I keep getting hits from THIS URL:

Google

Please?

====

Whoo. So frickin tired. Daph is back from Thailand, and Risha is off tomorrow. Ah, friends, they come, they go.

I recently broke a fine tradition Risha and I have upheld for about 8 years - I paid for her cheap Japanese birthday lunch. The fine tradition before this used to include me giving her one strip of Clorets chewing gum (not even the whole pack), and her giving me "Fresh Air and Sunshine" (I thought there was no way she could get cheaper than me, I was wrong).


That is not a happy face, just so you know.

This is what a homophobic person looks like when you suggest finding her a nice girl. She'd rather have an arranged marriage. She picked me up that day, and wasn't paying attention...So basically, my hairstyle came as a bit of a shocker..."Hey Lainie how are yOHGOD".

[ Stunned silence from Risha for a lil while as I sit in the car, close the door, and wait for the shock to settle ]

My mother, on the other hand, has taken to saying I look like a Kai Koong. Male chicken. Cockerel. Rooster. Kai koong, kai koong. Sigh.

=====

Was in Indulgence for a late dinner with Nisha and Risha. Daph joined us later on.

Risha was late. I called her when I was in the cab and

Risha: Woman, I will meet you there I am driving 20km per hour.
Lainie: ..................................

There could only be one explanation. She just had a manicure, and doesn't want to fuck it up. I don't know how we're friends. She's so tralala-shiny-makeup-sex and the city, and I'm so bleargh-go away-fuck off-frasier.

I arrived at Indulgence fifteen minutes before her - and she lives about five minutes away. Yeeeeeeesh.

Risha handed me a Christmas present to give a friend. It's a vibrator.

Lainie: Hmmmm. *eyes present*
Risha: YOU. Make sure it gets to her.
Lainie: Oh, don't worry, it will, it will.
Risha: It's her present, not yours.
Lainie: I know.
Risha: Lainie! Don't take her present!
Lainie: I'm just looking at it!

[ Looking! Not even touching, tapping my lips, looking sneaky, just LOOKING! ]

Risha: And it'd better be in the same wrapping paper as it was when I handed it to you!
Lainie: What?
Risha: Don't use it first!
Lainie: *eyes present*
Risha: Don't make me take photos of the wrapping now to compare with later.

Pffft.



Daph me Rish. Nisha is *not* a good photographer. Just like me. Like they say, there's something in the Ipoh water.



Daph and I doing god knows what. She's back! She's back! And she made a new song while she was in Thailand. It goes like this: "Beef noodles beef noodles, yummy yummy yummy yummy, beef noodles beef noodles, yummy yummy yummy yummy".

You know, if you don't look at the lyrics, what she was singing actually sounds really catchy.

She hinted at a "craving" for breakfast tomorrow, and I casually just did not look her way. Not that it worked, because she went ahead and blurted out she wants her bloody beef noodles for breakfast anyway.

I hope her breakfast plans don't include me, I'm not a morning person. I did, however, get her to agree to show Tei, KA and Kat around Ipoh, if they come visit when I'm not around (and I can almost guarantee that if they're here round breakfast time, they'll end up eating beef noodles).

Oh, my suspicious eyes:



Take a good long look at the mural.

I saw something awfully, awfully weird / suggestive about this painting, that both Daph and Rish missed. It could be just me, it could be the painting.

Oh and Risha has taken to saying this ever since I decided to.....expand my horizons.....

Risha: When are you going back into your closet? When?

To which I usually say:

Lainie: It's the same cupboard, just a lil bigger and more clothes than before, that's all.

=====

Some Inbox fun:

As you're probably aware, we're looking for names for the Independant
Musician's society. So far we have the following. If you have any names that
you may like to submit for consideration, please do so within the next few
days.

a) Society of Independant and Amateur Musicians (SIAM)

b) Persatuan Untuk Kemajuan Ilhamiah Musik dan Artis Kebangsaan (Would look
cool when you flash this at cops)

c) Angkatan Seniman SeMalaysia

d) Persatuan Intelek Seniman SeMalaysia

e) ORganisasi Gagasan Artis dan Seniman Malaysia

f) Ciptaan Independan Badan Artis dan Individu

g) Gagasan Organisasi Artis Tenggara

=====

Some Inbox not-fun:

Summary:
********
David Wong Der Woei from Paul's Place was charged in court (Sultan Abdul
Samad Building - Mahkhamah Jenayah 6) today on the following counts:

1) 4(1)(a) Entertainment act (Federal Territory) 1992

2) 4(1)(b) Entertainment act (Federal Territory) 1992 (Both operating an
unlicensed entertainment venue and organizing entertainment)

3) 5(1) Advertising act (Federal Terrritory) 1982 (For the Paul's Place
signage outside)

4) 3(2)(1) Excise act (For the 3 cases of beer found on the floor)

Initial bail was RM 10,000.00, his lawyer Amer Hamzah got the magistrate to
lower it to RM 7,200. David's scheduled to appear in court on 31 July, 1 and
2 August for all the above charges.

David claimed trial to all the above four charges. While we Amer drove us
around (crankin' vintage 80's Venom, DarkThrone and the Levellers) to hit
gather bail, David got to aquaint himself with the digs at the SAS Building
Lock Up Facilities. On the whole, he feels that the lock up facilities there
were far superior to the ones at the Brickfields Police Station. Even the
cuisine was better there.

TV3 reported this as "Black Metal - Tertuduh Tidak Mengaku Salah" (Accused
pleads not guilty on all charges), on the 8pm news. They shot some footage
of David leaving and entering the chambers (to take a whizz).

David.

Black Metal.

Riiiiight...

He's a frikkin Canto/Mando Pop, Beyond, S.H.E. listening geek.

=====

Wuargh.....I was gonna link up some sources at RiceCooker, in case there are any yo yos new readers who don't know what's happening......but I'm too sleepy. So. Click here and do it yourself

Written by lainie at 03:06 PM on January 19, 2006 in Daily Life.

Battle time. Sometimes I let a lot of stuff loose at one go, and see which gets my attention.

Which is why I have a playlist of songs with lyrics I love playing on my laptop, to go against the catchy ones in my head (currently Don't Lose Touch). And in my hands, a book I really like (that would currently be, The Ground Beneath Her Feet, to the weird googlers looking for the books Lainie tabulas.com likes- why didn't you just ask me instead?).

Against the book and music, the occasional thoughts I might want to blog. Vs, vs. Deng deng!

And my hot coffee. Which is accompanied by a cold one.
And the TV (on mute), if it is showing anything visually arresting.
And another book, in case I feel like reading it more (Daughter of Fortune).

I've been doing something like this since I was a kid, and it's one of the reasons why I tune things out so well. Right now, blogging is winning, because I can't read and have James Blunt playing at the same time. But the song is ending, and it's back to the book.

Yeah, I don't like making a decision on what I want, beforehand.

=====

I decided it was time to stop distracting myself when I realised I was stretching my rubber wristband between my finger and thumb, at the laptop, while staring blankly, and saying "Ngueeeek....nguekkkkk....ngueeekkk". Isn't it unsettling when you find yourself doing things for godknowswhat reason, and there's that "Wait, what am I doing?" moment? I'm not even sure how long I was doing it for.

....I implied something in my last photo post. But hey. Something to giggle about, by myself. Every so often I do wonder if I am....yknow. Not entirely sane.

Reading the papers a lil bit, skimmy skimmy straight to the comics. Had a good laugh. Scanned the headlines - don't want to encounter anything that'll traumatise me too much. No snooping, that's a relief - though it makes me want to get every bit as self-righteous as the dumbasses and slap some people. News of annoying idiocy, general incompetence and malversation. Who's really surprised? Sports pages, don't identify with it at all. Caffeine-charged 'dog show' artwork, oh helloooo. Kelantan gender segregation, kiss my ass.

Laughed at Jet Li's photo position, read about Brokeback Mountain. More people who really believe what they feel is enough justification to limit someone else's choices. Ah, and this is what I was lookin for: Designer at New Year's Eve gig charged (thank god no one said "black metal gig", I'd have an aneurysm on the spot). Case goes on trial end of July. Hmmph.

That was sporadic huh? Never mind. I don't wanna know, I don't wanna know.

I find that even when I like something, or am impressed by it, it can't keep me for long. And I wonder if this is somehow related to my past relationship, with Fip. Or if in my retrospection I'm superimposing whatever is running through my mind now.

This is the first time, since my holidays, where I am staying at home, without plans of meeting up with anyone later, without pestering a friend with my smses, without a location in mind to wander around aimlessly till it's time to come home and sleep (or rather, stay with a friend and sleep there). In fact, I am not lonely, but I am quite aware of being alone.

I try not to stay home too much, because I fall back into old habits of talking to myself, and I find that the older I get, the weirder my conversations seem to become because I'm more aware of the things that I don't know. I become more Lainie, less Lainie.

One of the reasons not to reach old age: Nightmare visions of me as an old biddy, stuck at home, with just me, and me, and me to talk to. Oh, my god. I don't know whether people will think I'm mad after a while, or if I'd really, really, really have lost my mind by then.

So really. Ipoh doesn't drive me mad. I do that to myself. Of course, I have too many distractions in KL to actually do that the same there.

Mmmm.

Oh wait. I know what to do. Blog. Surf. Email. Shower, play with dog. Then, pray as I hunt around at home that I was smart enough to leave some anti-histamines behind in Ipoh.

Written by lainie at 11:31 AM on January 20, 2006 in Daily Life, Arty stuff.

Film, anyone? CIPLAK the movie by Khairil M. Bakar.

Now in his final year of university and on the last day of his last visit to Malaysia before finishing up his degree and settling in 'back home' for good, he's about to make the biggest shipment yet: 175 movies. With a buyer in England who'll pay 50 pounds a DVD in order to make copies, Jo's hit the jackpot.

Too bad he's chosen the day KL is hit with the biggest anti-piracy raid in history to pick up his shipment.

Some familiar names involved in this. CK and Ben act as pirated DVD sellers *eyeroll*. Peter Hassan Brown. Rauf Fadzillah. Oh and download the trailer. It's fun.

======

Daph: Your new hair, it's very dyke.
Lainie: Yes I know. Side effect of this style.
Daph: You're not doing this just to look more gay right?
Lainie: Babes. I wouldn't need to get short hair just to look more lesbian. I know how to do that perfectly well, with long hair.

Because if there is such a thing as a lesbian look, I'd definitely kinda somewhat almost know what it is. Then again, KA told me she had this conversation with her dad that went something like this:

Dad: So Lainie, is she dating anyone?
KA: Wellll. She just broke up.
Dad: Oh, just broke up? Who was her boyfriend?
KA: Welll....You remember Fip?
Dad: Huh?
KA: Yeah. She was dating Fip.
Dad: She's lesbian?
KA: Yeah she was dating a girl.
Dad: Oh. Doesn't look very lesbian.

If only he could see me now.

So yes. You lesbians in hiding out there, all you need is long, flowing hair - don't straighten it, as according with the Lesbian Hair Theory, we still need a bit of off-ness to distinguish you from the rest of the heteros easily.
Just keep it long, wavy, and past your boobs or something. That way, the gay ones can still sense you out but the parents might not.

I'm being an arse, as usual. I do hope you people realise it when I'm being assy. You'd drive me nutters otherwise.

=====

Let's see. Just came home from some beers with Daph, Christine and Irene.

Pah, I don't feel like sleeping, even though I should. Mmmm. Need to distract myself. MP3s, save me now!

Right. I was supposed to just chill on music but ended up making a mini poster again:



I'm actually supposed to be building up my portfolio, but ah the shite (heh) I end up making. I wonder if you guys remember (cause I ain't going through my archives to find it, are you kidding?), but some time back I asked what you people thought about activists.

Basically, what kicked off that question was my mother remarking that "All activists talk bullshit" (and if you're one, and meet my mother one day, please, please, please play nice because this woman cooks my dinner and I like being alive - you'd think I could make my life just that much easier by not posting this in the first place).

Something in Cantonese about how they're all concerned about the world when people need to put food on the table and in their stomachs.

While I was slightly startled (I was supposed to go for FNBKL's workshop the next day or something), I was also kinda amused. Like, the amount of shite Malaysians get, you'd think we were actually campaigning for bullshit (and I know this is like inviting snippy comments about a few certain bloggers out there but do try to control yourself yar).

Consider my blog an exercise on restraining yourself.

So. That's how the poster kinda came about (I didn't actually say it'd make that much sense, or that it'd even have a point).

A part of me is slightly embarrassed by the slipshodness poster. Like, maybe I should add more texture to the signs, or a bigger crowd, less Christmassy, or hell, even a better composition. But when I say five minute poster, I mean five minutes (well, I'm not really exactly sure how long it took - I was done before Guns n Roses, November Rain was done playing though).

I'm not very...inspired...to spend more time on something that won't go into my portfolio.

Artistic integrity? What the hell's that?

[ I always get these nasty premonitions this phrase of mine will come back and haunt me, because I roughly shrug off my blog entries the same way, and my goodness has tabulas developed a connoisseur's taste for my butt.]

The crowd's mostly clones of each other, the ones at the back originally set at different transparencies but it got too weird (and they're all so short cause the first one I made, doesn't really have legs, and I'm too lazy to adjust them, so it's either a small, short crowd, or a bunch of amputated protestors).

Actually. The idea of amputated protestors is rather amusing too. Amputees campaigning for shite.

The only reason I'm admitting the crowd is copy and paste is because
1) it's obvious
2) I'd look very silly if I admitted that I individully drew out about ten identical people.

Mmmm. I'm still awake. How how how. I think writing this out took longer than the poster? Oh, no it didn't. Hah. Had to check. I wish I could work this fast for my assignments (and this simply).

HOLY SHIT. I was just checking out my downloads folder (oh, now that's a headache I'm not keen to sort out). Was listening to Shelley Leong mp3 I just got from Kennysia's site, and a podcast from NY Comedy Bling, while unzipping all those annoying Winzip / Winrar files.

Can't even remember where the hell I got them from, but it's videos of people protesting and (protestors - posters, fricking coincidental huh?) my goodness, the police are scary people.

Wow that is one fiiiiiierce woman. Mmm. Is this the KLCC protests videos?

Ugggghhhh....Motion sickness watching that...Damn moving camera. It was from www.djnovin.com if you guys wanna look at it. I can't see anymore, I'm not good with stuff like that because I get dizzy - it's the only thing that kept me from playing games like Duke Nukem when I was in school.

Oh yeah, it is KLCC, the file name says so. I have like 3 of them, there's no way I can finish it. Bleurghhhhhs. Dizzy. Diiiiizzy....

Instead of watching, I'm just listening now. If I was a copper, I wouldn't wanna be there, those screams are loud - Loud voices intimidate me. All I hear is the police telling them to open up something, then saying don't let them open it, and next thing I know, I hear tangkap tangkap tangkap (amidst screams and protests from the woman).

[ tangkap = catch? ]
[ Sooooooooo.....what did they actually do that got them arrested? ]
[ I don't think I'd ever be a rapist then. Unless I have a lot of those date rape drugs. ]
[ Is it still rape if I rape a girl, since I don't actually have a penis? ]
[ Why the hell am I thinking of all these? gah gah gah gahhhhhhhh ]

In all honesty, I'm the kind who would rather give in than hear a distressed female voice continuously screaming. I don't care what the fuck it is, just give in to make her stop, we can deal with whatever the hell it is, after she's done screaming. Not that I think it's actually applicable here. Mmmm. Just a thought.

I really fail to see how I'm helping myself sleep this way. If anything it's waking me up more. Right. Change of plans. Book. I NEED my sleep because Daph wants to wake up for beef noodles breakfast, then it's off to the waterfalls.

Fuck. It's 4am.

====

HAHA...I just realised something so incredibly stupid, I HAVE to type it out before sleeping. Was listening to music and reading, waiting to get drowsy, when it dawned on me I could just switch off the lights, lie down with my eyes closed, and wait.

My god. That's what you people have been doing all along, innit? Oh god. I can't believe, I CAN'T BELIEVE, I didn't even think about doing that. I'm probably too used to either working on assignments till I can't stay awake any longer, or only going to sleep when whoever I'm sleeping with does too.

Did I mention, it's 6.30am now? Hah. Haha. Well done Lainie.

=====

Woke up at 930. Mom wanted grocery shoppings. Eyes feel like ping pong balls. Bleh. And....I changed the poster a lil bit - made one fellow red.

And..........I apologise don't give a fuck if the blog post made no sense.

Written by lainie at 12:10 PM on January 20, 2006.

Greetings and salutations,

This Saturday 21 Jan 2006 3pm, Paul's Place.

We invite all members of the Independant Music Community for the following:

a) Brief overview of what the hell's been going on the past few weeks and a
description of the proposed Society of Independant and Amateur Musicians
(SIAM). We are in the process of setting up this society with the Registrar
of Societies. It typically takes 4-9 months to register a society but we
want to have the framework, i.e., committee in place before we register.

b) Nominations for the following posts:


President
Vice President
Secretary
Assistant Secretary
Treasurer

Committees
**********
Legal Advisory
Public Relations/Promotions
Information Technology/Communications (web design, database management etc)
Community Representation (this person will liaise with the various
community reps)
-Punk
-Metal
-Chinese Independant
-General/Any other suggestions will be welcome but let's not go overboard with genre classifications.

NOTE 1: The above structure may change slightly on Saturday as we're still working out some kinks. If you have any nominees for these positions, please bring them along.

wrt the President and Vice President's positions, please consider inviting
people with the following backgrounds:

1) Extensive experience with some facet of the music industry/community, artist, label owner, journalist etc.

2) Good presentation skills, English, Bahasa Melayu.

3) Good management and organizational skills

NOTE 2: For Legal Advisory, bring in the lawyers and put them up for
nomination. We need our own shysters.

NOTE 3: Did we mention that the compensation package and benefits for all the position above were....nothing. You only get the satisfaction of driving this community to achieve it's vision of excellence and world domination.

c)We are in the process of drafting a petition to be sent to the authorities describing our dissatisfaction with the Goatgate events and harassment of independant musicians, particularly our youth. We hope you will be present to sign that petition.

Please note that this meeting shall be held in Paul's Place, a Private
Venue. Hence, no permits are required. I.e., it's safe. I.e., you have the
same probability of being dicked around with chillin' at Mc Donalds.

HOWEVER, PLEASE:
****************
a) Don't congegrate (lepak) in large groups OUTSIDE the venue, i.e., at the
kaki lima. Go to the mamak stalls/restaurants if you need to chill and chat.

b) Don't bring any goats. Unless they're in a tasty curry.

Email me if you have any questions.

Please note the invitation to the meeting at Paul's on 21 Jan 2005 and SIAM
(or whatever it ends up being called) membership is for Musicians and Non
Musicians (music fans, groupies) alike.

Regards,

Rafil


=====

Totally unrelated (just living up to the reputation of blogging more than anyone could possibly want to read):

Against Me - Don't Lose Touch (Download page).

You're coming off kinda contrived and pretentious.
You're not saying anything we haven't heard before.
You're caught up in an argument.
Oh, oh you're so lost in modern art.

You will lose it all.
And you will find again.
Don't lose touch.
Don't lose touch.

S.O.S. texted from a cell phone?
Please tell me I'm not the only one,
that thinks we're taking ourselves too seriously,
Just a little too enamored with inflated self-purpose.

Talk is cheap.
And it doesn't mean much.
Don't lose touch.
Don't lose touch.
I'm losing touch.
I'm losing touch.

Constant entertainment for our restless minds.
Constant stimulation for epic appetites.
Is there something wrong with these songs?
Maybe there's something wrong with the audience.
Manipulation in rock music, fucking nausea.

I'm losing touch.
I'm losing touch, and it's obvious.

Written by lainie at 01:35 PM on January 20, 2006 in Arty stuff.

I don't bother to say people who aren't heterosexual are just the same as heteros, bla bla bla, bla bla bla, because to have to POINT OUT that we're all just people feels a bit silly (shouldn't it be bloody obvious?)......and seems to imply, to myself, that there ARE differences after all.

I mean. There are. But....... Uh. Uhhhh.

X_X.

Brainey no likey the thinkey.

Wait, wait, give me a moment to try and form this into something more coherent.

Okay, you know what?

Brainey REALLY no likey the thinkey.

Just stop making such a big deal of it, goddammit. There is nothing wrong with straights, gaydom, biism, trans, or whatever. People give me a headache.

And to quote from my IRC days: I poke poke your head.

=====

I call this poster :

"For God's Sake, That is NOT How You Use a Squatting Toilet".

I think it's the longest title I ever gave anything.



Click for full size, because usually image quality after tabulas resizing is terrible (not that I reckon you people care. Hmm).

Lovingly dedicated to a friend. He's a recent source of hilarity, who hated pissing / shitting in squatting toilets for ages.

Well who wouldn't, look at what he goes through just to take a dump. Strange butt clenching yogi positions, placing palms / fingers on nasty, NASTY toilet floors. We had no idea he was doing all that funkiness in there.

We have now taught him the art of squatting (without sending him to a police station, even). Our squatting toilets are not a problem anymore, I'm glad to hear.

Oh, and if you find a full roll of toilet paper in the loos, it's time to go get your lottery tickets, someone up there is liking you.

And I'm off to the waterfalls. Where toilets should be even less of a problem for some friends. I'm going with Daph and Nessa. Somewhat cautious, because everytime I'm with either of them, in a big body of water, I end up getting pissed on.

Literally.

Pissed on, pissed next to, surrounded by piss. Piss. Piss. PISS.

I hope we bring beer. Singha!

Written by lainie at 11:21 PM on January 20, 2006 in Friends, Holidays / Road Trip, Links / Email.

First, some L word related-gayness, because who gives a crap whether you identify with my blog or not?

It's hard to go through four years of a Humanities B.A. reading Foucault and Butler and watching 'The L Word' and keep your rigid heterosexuality intact. I don't know when it happened exactly, but it seems I no longer have the easy certainty of pinning my sexual desire to one gender and never the other.
College taught her not to be a heterosexual.

*gigglegigglegiggle*

Either that's a good way of covering up her past ("sure, honey, whatever makes you feel better" and all that), or......I've just found the hot new way of turning a girl gay - and it doesn't involve alcohol, kissing games, or...or...never mind.

I guess I'll just wait for psychology class to start in Cenfad, get into manic get-girls-to-enrol mode, and see if Bernice can be convinced to do Foucault instead of Freud (because if I'm gonna study either of these annoyances, it might as well be the one that'll help me get laid - I very much doubt reading about penis obsessions will be half as helpful).

I saw this in my email: "Jennifer Beals outs Kate Moennig". Normally, I'm the kinda person who'll read the whole page on any article, but this was a very....scan for keywords, fuck the rest of the article....kinda thing.

" Jennifer Beals appears to have outed fellow L Word star Katherine Moennig in a new interview with The Advocate in which she says she considers it a compliment that a studio exec thought she was bisexual, because "oftentimes I will go [to] Leisha or Kate or Ilene or Rose Troche and ask, 'OK, is this the right thing to do? Is this not the right thing to do? Am I going to seem like a total chump if I do this?'"
from AfterEllen.com.

Just so we're clear, there's this smile that's been fixed on my face the past few minutes and I can't get rid of it. I keep getting this "My mother's gonna be suspicious if I don't stop grinning soon" vibes.

I don't care how typical it is to like Shane! I don't care! I don't care! Haha...It's mostly such a stupid show, but I like it.

=====

Had a disagreement with a friend recently. I think I see the problem. I'm more....vibe. Feel. Intuition. Connotations. She's more.....exact. Rigid. Logical. Denotations. It's a wonder we even understand each other enough to disagree.

I don't think I can even blame my recent sleep deprivation on this.

But never mind. Oooh, books.

=====

Just came back from the waterfalls. 8 people, 20 minute drive, 15 minute trek, and so many bottles of beer we cleared out the store's supply of big bottles of Tiger Beer. Heaps of munchies too - Twisties, Super Rings.

Lugged the food, kept going up up up, far away from the crowds. Finally reached "our spot" where we always hang out. It's perfect there, cause it's closed off from the rest of the jungle. All there is, a pool, one cold waterfall, and lots of big slippery stones. And loads of big, tall trees.

Was the first to climb up to the big, slippery rock right under the waterfall. Sat there getting drenched, laughing at the others who were trying to come up too, before dragging Daphne up. Then we both sat and laughed at Nessa, whose rock climbing technique involves lying flat at the bottom, and flapping her way up like a spastic seal (she improved her techniques after that, must have realised how stupid she looks).

Sometimes we'd use each other as body-ladders, because the rock's just too smooth and the water pushes us off. Slide down into the water. The water was fucking fricking fracking freeeeeeeeeezing!

Sat on another big rock that's dry - got to it by walking along a really big, dead tree trunk bridge. We drank beer, got a bit tipsy, had some munchies (and yes, we cleaned up afterwards and towed away our junk in lil bags). Played games and told bad jokes.

I owe Nessa ten dollars because she caught some lil fish, and I said I'd give her the money if she'd swallow it live. Which she did. She said it flapped on the way down (I knew she'd do it because she's a dumbass).

[ Also, because she's done it before. ]

I made an announcement the moment we arrived at our spot. The same one I make EVERYTIME we go to the falls, I don't know why I bother.

"Anyone needs to piss, do it downstream".

Then as I was standing next to Nessa in the water.

Lainie: Brrrrr....Water's fuckin cold!
Nessa: Yeah. Well. You should just keep standing next to me.
Lainie: ..............
Nessa: ...............

[ Warm water surrounds my body, briefly ]

Lainie: Awwwww.
Nessa: HahahahaHAHAHA!

It is NOT funny to piss on your friends. I repeat: It is NOT funny to piss on / around your friends, dammit!

And of course, pissing + water will definitely include Daph, who also did something similar:

Lainie: Downstream, dammit! DOWNSTREAM!
Daph: This is downstream! Look, the water flows down!
Lainie: .....Downstream means down there, past us, not anywhere the water eventually flows away, much less near the beginning of the fall.

I mean. Don't get me wrong. I love my friends. I just wish they'd stop being so.....liberal.....with sharing their bodily fluids unnecessarily.

Saw Irene's star tattoo. Looks like one I've had in mind (well, one of the elements anyway). She loves all things to do with stars. She was wearing a star pendant, has 4(?) star tatts that I saw, star tie, and god knows star what else. She's a lil star girl.

Rach and I had a conversation about star tattoos once, but I can't fully remember it and now it's bugging me. Babes, what was it about?

Daph came up with some more of her silly songs. Some lyrics went "Malaysia, truly asiaaa, because everyone cares, we are happy, and we smile"....and "You are my best friends....yes you are.....because...you just are...and yeah...really..." or something about as poetical like that. Then she rehashed some "Dirty Dancing" scenes, boogieing on the tree trunk while we watched. It was funny. I thought she'd fall off a coupla times, dumbass.

Occasionally cooled the beer in the water. Water's totally clear, by the way. Nessa wandered off to some clearing to explore, Daph and I got worried. We called out to her, and she later came back with some icky stories about her pooing in a hole she dug in the ground.

Lainie: How the hell did you clean your ass?
Nessa: With a leaf, what else?
Lainie: Okayyyyy......
Nessa: What, haven't you done it before?

[ The last time I was stupid enough to go camping (and that was about 6 years back), I trekked 30 minutes into town just to PISS, she thinks I'm going to take a dump in some hole I dug in the ground? I am NOT a nature girl. ]

While we were drinking on the big rock, telling jokes, there was this guy who kinda....for almost half an hour, squatted, intently watching us the entire time. -_-". I guess it was cause it was mostly all girls, in wet clothes, drinking...and he's a saddo?

Meghan said it wasn't worth the effort to yell at him, or anything. Besides, we didn't want to yell at one dude and find out he has a lil army of violent dumb friends.

Nessa: I bet he has a boner.
Lainie: (too disturbing an idea for me to reply)

[ All girls turn around and stare at him ]

Lainie: You know what would really ruin this view for him?
Daph: What?
Lainie: If we got the two boys to take off their pants, and stand facing him the whole while.
Daph: Haha! Yeah! Or even their butts would be enough!
Lainie: Then again, he might just be checking out the boys, not the girls.
Daph: Hmmmm.
Lainie: Hmmmm.

He went away, so girls felt more comfortable getting back into the water to play around again - I was worried he'd be pissing or wanking or something, and he was upstream. Where we had hiked up to, not many people bother to go that far, and the trail becomes really shite after a while. So. Being cut off from people is good fun, but it's easily ruined by just any ol creep that decides to hike up just as much.

I trembled when I got into the water again, it was so cold.

A lil while more in the water, and we left. Walked back down to the car. My slippers made it really difficult to walk cause my feet were too wet - also, it is sad to say, I don't actually own any practical shoes for walking, much less in the jungle.

Mmm. Now I'm off to read a book, and go to sleep. I'm tired from the waterfalls (we were there for hours).

My mother disses the song I'm listening to, because it has the lines "Bloody mother fucking asshole" (Martha Wainwright). Surprisingly, she didn't say anything when "shit piss fuck cunt cocksucker motherfucker tits fart turd and twat" (Blink 182) came on before.

I notice songs by women, with cusses, gets to her more .

So, being me, I've lined up the next song in my playlist: Ani diFranco - Fuck You. If it used to unnerve my male housemates so much....I just wanna see what it does to my mother.

Maybe I should stop provoking her on purpose. I am so curious though.

Tralalalaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa............

Written by lainie at 01:05 PM on January 21, 2006 in Rants.

I can't believe I'm actually admitting this on the internet, but here goes. I woke up with a question in my head.

"What is an apple?".

Just so you know, I barely question anything, much less when I wake up. I don't even know where that question came from (uhm. I kinda do, but I'd rather not dwell on that). Well. I'm not sure who I'm comparing myself to, since the only people who talk about thinking probably think too much anyway (am I contradicting myself? Aii. Self-kantoi, Lainie specialty).

The moment that question appeared in my head, I veeeeeery grumpily opened my eyes, heaved a huge sigh, looked up at my room ceiling (my god of many years throughout my teens), and I knew it was gonna be one of those days even as I tried to sink back in my pillow.

So there I was in bed, trying to get back to sleep, thinking "what what what...Damn, what the FUCK is an APPLE?".

[ You know one good way to annoy someone is to constantly poke them (KA don't pervert up the sentence damn you). Poke. Poke. Poke. Poke. My mind is kneeling beside my bed, and poking my head with it's finger. Asshole. ]

[ Then I check my phone to see the time, and there are smses from four friends, asking me about what to write in their assignments. You know, more questions I can say "I don't know" to. Google and Wikipedia, dammit! I have apples to think about! ]

Back to apples. Fruit. Yes. Only fruit in existence. No. Red? Not necessarily. Colour is too iffy a definition (fruit racism! haha yesiknowi'mlameshutup). Adam and Eve. Peace fruit? Food?

[ *Makes mental note to stop dissing cave allegory* ]

If I held up an apple, and said, this is an apple, would it explain what it was. I mean, it's a label, but it doesn't say much. And is it more apple or less apple than the next apple. Apples from different places. Apples from different soil. Apples breathing different air, ending up in different pies, pots, grounds, crates, stomachs. Apples contained. Apples rolling down the hill. Apples that become trees.

You have no idea how fucked up it is to fuck up your own sleep like this.

I got up, thinking I'd put my mind at peace by getting an apple from the kitchen (mother eats lots of fruits, we usually have heaps of them apples at home). Thinking, smiling to myself, I might not know What, Exactly, an apple is, but among everything in the kitchen, the most apple of the lot will be what we call an apple.

So I do know what an apple is, because I'm going to get it! Tralala, world getting better! And after that, I will log onto the internet, find the definition of apple, print it out, and paste it on the apple (behind mother's back, in case she yells at me for wasting food).

[ *Mental note to stop assuming so readily that I'll make my own life easy ]

Downstairs. No apples. What, the, hell.

I need apples. Well. There are mandarin oranges. They're more apple than say, the cucumbers. I think. Wait. I wanted to say shape-wise, then I had an image of some stupid apple out there that was tubular. But general shape wise, oranges are more apple than cucumbers.

So if I know what an apple is, and what an orange is, and what a cucumber is, shouldn't I know whether a cucumber or an orange is more apple? Goddammit, the one day I need an apple at home, I'm surrounded by oranges and cucumbers.

[ *Makes mental note to download Alanis Morissette's Ironic, talk about ten thousand spoons* ]

Had a nice dose of caffeine. Realised I was being exasperating ass (what is an ass, oh ho ho ho ho ho). Decided, apples can fuck off, it doesn't matter anyway.

But before they completely fuck off, I put my Streamyx internet connection to good use (well, I used it, good or not is slightly more subjective):

apple noun 1 any of numerous varieties of a small deciduous tree with pink or white flowers and edible fruit. 2 the firm round edible fruit of this tree, which has a green, red or yellow skin and white flesh, and is eaten fresh or cooked, or used to make fruit juice, cider, etc. 3 in compounds • apple-blossom • apple-corer. 4 as adj • apple-green. apples and pears Cockney rhyming slang stairs. in apple-pie order neat and tidy. the apple of one's eye someone's favourite person • That baby is just the apple of her eye. upset the apple cart to disrupt carefully made plans.
ETYMOLOGY: Anglo-Saxon æppel.
Chambers

Then blogged about it, because if I am gonna waste time thinking of apples, I can certainly fuck around with other people's schedules making them think of apples (come on, you don't know what an apple is, no one does.......nyeh, hehe).

[ *Mental note: Be skeptical of anyone who manages to present an idea or concept, because pages, time, our own minds are so limited, then...what the fuck am I talking about? Stop making mental notes and go download Alanis. ]

And in case any smarty pants decides to ask: No this is not some huge metaphor, I really was wondering about apples.

I don't need to read other stuff to confuse me. I am perfectly capable of doing that to myself. But just so you know, I'd been reading up on zips lately. Yes, numbnuts, that thing in front of your pants. Because I was wondering about multi-coloured zips and....you know what, I should stop here.

My absolutely mostest bestest favouritest part of all this:

Knowing Pre-Kindergarten through third grade school children at this school don't have my problem

It's a good thing they're not in Malaysia. I don't think my mother will appreciate finding out that I've been campaigning outside some preschool against the definitions of apples. Or something. Whatever.

I'm going to sleep. Again. Because today is not a good day to be me.

Written by lainie at 06:23 PM on January 21, 2006 in Stupid, but fun..

I finally chatted online with Fireangel. She had her webcam on.

Nyehehehe.

Right before that, I'd been bugging Paultan about the apples. Then Fireangel joined in and said this:

Fireangel: are u guys having some sort of a religious deep philosophical debate which has no end? if so i'll take myself out.

So obviously, FA being far more important than apples, we moved on to other deep philosophical debates like bullshitology, crapology, vodkalogy, whiskeyism and my new favourite word: beerlosophy.

Beerlosophy, my Singha deity!

Drink drink drink! I had some beer while chatting with them, and the conversation did not evolve much past alcohol and sex. Does anything else matter? And FireAngel's WMDs (heh). Oh and the occasional Korean actress FireAngel insists is hot, but Paul and I think is okaylah, short of a few really nice photos.

Song Hye Gyo. I don't know. Too many photos of her doing the "Deer Caught In Headlights" kiut kiut kawaii photos for me. Makes me annoyed.

As a mark of respect to FA watching Korean shows, and listening to Korean pop songs, I wrote a lil Korean song for her (well, except it's in English, so I guess not)

"i tear my balls out as I think of you
and a slow tear slides down my face
it hits the snow, and melts
as blooood falls to the ground"

It doesn't even make sense, really. But hey. Now that I think about it, that's not very Korean. If I wanted to make it more in-your-face, judging by my extremely limited knowledge of Korean shows, it should have been

"I have no balls, you have no breasts
but if you ever turn blind. I will give you my eyeballs
and dump you so you never knooow
and can date my best friend in peace
because he is a better man
and I have no eyes
you deserve him
I have cun walking sticks
and a photo of you in my wallet
that I cannot see (violin solo)"

[ Okay, just try not to hate me too much after that ]
[ You're supposed to drag all the words to their full emo capacity. Yes, you too, can sing heartfelt songs about balls. ]

Had to cut off the conversation after awhile (no more FA webcam, damn!). Ran some errands, and juuuuuuuuust about relaxed with a book when Daph messaged to say she wanted to go to KL.

You know, if that numbnuts had just decided that half an hour earlier I could have gone, but now my mom's already cooking my dinner and I'll be damned if I do that to her. Plus, dinner smells nice.

Written by lainie at 10:53 PM on January 21, 2006.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY STALKEE!

I STILL THINK YOU'RE GAY!!

You gaydar breaker.

Have a good one.

And remember to get drunk.

Because otherwise it'd be harder for KA to kidnap you for me.

Lola. Lalalalala Lola.

I'll bring a big bottle of alcohol, some toys some good movies, and more alcohol, and we'll have a combined birthday party the next time we meet, for all the previous ones I've missed.

Private party. But KA can come join us as your security blanket, and my partner in crime (may even let her hold the camera later, even if it blinds her).

[ Sleaziest birthday message to ever appear on my blog ]

=====

Ganked off Neil Gaiman's blog.

Go Go Google! Google refuses White House search request

This makes me want to wave a hanky at someone local, who might take the White House's side......but.....Mmmm. I have my reasons not to. Tralalala

=====

Edrei tagged me...Bad...Bad boy...


4 Jobs I’ve Had In Your Life:

* Selling clothes with a psycho bee-yatch
* Computer-content stuff
* at House&co.
* hmm. Funny, I thought there'd be more. I'm probably forgettin something. I wish I could say "dutiful daughter" but nah.

[ Jobs I've Had in Your Life? Hah? ]

4 Movies I Could Watch Over and Over:

* Pulp Fiction
* Closer
* Leon, The Professional
* Priscilla, Queen of the Desert.

4 TV Shows I Love(d) To Watch:

* Golden Girls
* Just Shoot Me
* Frasier
* 70s show

4 Places I’ve Lived:

* Ipoh
* KL
* Subang
* Cyberjaya

4 Places I’ve Been On Vacation To:

* I.d.Better.Leave.This.

4 Places I Would Rather Be:

* a nice library (damn. that sounds geeky).
* getting a tattoo.
* at Lola's birthday party getting her drunk. with no unpure intentions, of course.
* in someone else's house.

4 Of My Favourite Foods:

* Wasabe
* ....
* ........
*.........favourite's pushing it a lil.

4 Websites I Visit Daily:

* PPS.
* BlogsMalaysia
* Gmail.com
* and a whole shitload of blogs.

4 Unfortunate Souls Tagged:

Hah...I'll spare y'all.

Written by lainie at 12:11 AM on January 22, 2006 in Links / Email, Stupid, but fun..

Haha...This is for whoever's been looking for the Colleen Coover comics I posted up on my site quite some time back.

[ FUCKING NOT SAFE FOR WORK, AIGHT? Veeeeeeery graphic lesbian sex comics, don't say I didn't say so . ]

Pic 1
Pic 2
Pic 3

Colleen Coover's LJ

I understand that sometimes, Imageshack is a pain in the ass to use. Well. . Your problem, figure it out. 

Oh. And if any of you are in Kino anytime soon, check out Sherwin Tjia's Pedigree Girls. I'd been googling the title for ages, under the impression that it's "Poodle Girls".

 

 It's got two bratty girls saying slashy stuff like

"Hey, wanna see my nipple piercing?"

"Okay"..... ........."Those aren't pierced"

"Yeah, sorry".

It's in the comics section, with a pink cover . 

 Or, read a few examples online at Pedigree Girls blogspot.

 I like both comics heaps.Heaps and heaps and heaps. However, I doubt I'm getting my hands on Coover's any time soon.     

 Okay. Enough blog posts bombardments.

Written by lainie at 01:40 PM on January 22, 2006 in Family, Arty stuff.

Decided to draw something with a mechanical pencil. Took a picture. Desat-Highpass-Contrast-Lighten-Multiply-then Coloured it in Photoshop. But it still has all that noise if zoomed up close, because I am lazy to touch up .

Some people have been...faceless...on my blog lately. So I gave them a "face". The face I kinda see (well, vibe, but I have no idea how to make that a picture sooooo).
But with colour - because they're ridiculous people, so this cannot be a serious painting



It looks MUCH prettier on Deviantart....

I didn't think I'd be putting this up anywhere except for my own use at home, so there are some fuckiness I didn't consider - not that I'm pointing out what it is if you don't know.

The eyes are tightly shut, ears missing, brain cropped out of the picture.....but the mouth, the mouth is wide open. And a blessed tongue, god knows how many inches long. Two, even. I am too kind. Kiss the tongue! Kiss the tongue!

This is for all you anonymous-self-righteous lil bitches out there, yo. And those who aren't anonymous, but only have a name to differentiate them from the former.

You guys should be flattered, I normally wouldn't bother. But knowing you ungrateful arses, you'd just be insulted. Or is this even vague acknowledgement of your existence going to stroke your bloated ego further? Oh good grief, you'd probably like that. Mmmphmm. Do I care? Hah.

[ I guess what initially ticked me off was the whole "how could you date that race" insinuations. You dumbasses. It should never, NEVER be about that. ]

Having a laugh with myself - This sounds like such an artsy fartsy way to deal with it. You pissed me off, I will now PAINT YOU!! Graahhhhhhh!! Sigh. Need a way to be more threatening.

[ I just had a nasty image of me getting angry, and instead of kicking some dude's balls, I go home and paint. Hmph. Maybe I should just have best of both worlds. Kick, then go home and paint the expressions on their faces post-Lainie's-Foot-Induced-trauma ]

Kinda fun to colour this in. I'm terrible with colours - which is why most of my stuff, I've found, aren't so painful on the eyes if minimise colour use or at least have one predominant colour scheme running throughout. I've not used so many at a go in ages!

[ Magic Wand +10 tolerance +Contiguous +Sample All Layers = Yeayness, and if only some people came with setting options like this ]

Hmmm.Even my room feels tainted by the presence of this face. I don't like what it represents. But heck, I got music to counter it! The more I look at it, the more it looks like some CD cover in the making.

"This is Not a Multi-Coloured Face" (Whoo, pun on two artists at a go, yeah Lainie yeah! I'm changing my name from Lainie Yeoh to Lainie Yeah!).

(I'm kidding).

And oh, it's 4am. A lil bit of reading then I should be just nice and drowsy enough for a sleep soon. Just so you know - I painted the whole thing without my specs on, and it looks more melted that way. Well yeah, obviously, but mmm.Without my specs on, it looks so much closer to what I want.

=====

And again, woke up by 8am. FUCK. HOW??

=====

Woke up again - 12. Okay, more acceptable.

Was making lunch when something set off a sneezing fit. Right after that, mum came down to checkity that I wasn't burning down the kitchen, I guess, even if I was only making sandwiches.

I was sniffling away (contributing factor: caffeine withdrawal). Well I had to, or I'd be leaking all over the kitchen, how yuck would that be?

Mom: You sound like you're a drug addict.
Lainie: Hah?
Mom: Sniffing so much.
Lainie: Yah. Yah I am on drugs. I do it every night.
Mom: .....
Lainie: Before I go to sleep.
Mom: .......*ignores*
Lainie: *sings* I'm on drugs, I'm on drugs, I'm ooooon druuuuugs

It's a fun song. I recommend you come up with your own tune and sing it to your mother too. She mostly ignored it, and showed me how to slice a snadwich properly so the bread sticks to the filling...or something. Just realised I wasn't really paying attention.

====

Been getting around to downloading lately, all the songs I used to listen to. I love how when Michelle Shocked rocks, she really rocks. Her slower songs are okay too. Found more bootlegs of "You can sleep while I drive" (Melissa Etheridge & KD Lang, mmpmh). Sublime mp3s (I used to have every MP3 I could find floating about. Seriously).

Ah. Aaaaaaaaah. Music.

Written by lainie at 12:05 AM on January 23, 2006 in Family.

A lil mini update, since I'm actually reading this book that I enjoy, but am taking foreverrr to finish.


Mother watched some Hercules show on TV, and suddenly piped up:

Mom: He's got no acting skills, but big muscles.
Lainie: Isn't that all Hercules will need? Muscles?
Mom: His breasts are bigger than yours.
Lainie: -_-"
Mom: Really! Look at that! That man is a bigger cup size than you are! Look how big his breasts are!

To quote my stalkee.... "Now you know whose womb I cometh from."

Written by lainie at 12:15 PM on January 23, 2006 in Music, Stupid, but fun..

First, some geogruffy stuff:

America

NY Comedy Bling has a new podcast up.

Malaysia in comics:

You really gotta see this...Filthy Malaysian toilets kills off character in the Transmetropolitan comic.

Indonesian Fighting Spoon vs Malaysian Battle Spatula

=====

*slowly suffocates on Tegan and Sara's cover of "When You Were Mine"*

I didn't know it was possible to fuck up a song cover like this. Somebody, call Avril Lavigne, I've found her calling. If that horrid rendition goes anywhere near L Word, I'm going to start a "Bring Betty Back" campaign. Well, not really.

[ Actually the more I listen to their version the more used I get to it, and I'm still trying to figure out if this is a good or bad thing. Nah, I think I just like the original too much, it leaks over to all the bad versions too. ]

Maybe it's not a good idea to listen to them when I've been listening to Against Me! on repeat.

SOS texted from a cellphone
Please tell me I'm not the only one
Who thinks we're taking ourselves too seriously
Just a lil too enamoured with inflated self-purpose.
Jengjengjengjengjeng!!!!
I'm losing touch

I'd propose marriage to him, but apparently it's a nasty-unhealthy habit to acquire, threatening to put wedding rings on every singer / band-leader I like. And apparently I can't even have multiple husbands, much less wives. Oi, who made the rules?

Not that I...uh......Even entertain the idea of marrying much. If at all. Unless someone wrote a song I love and I'm listening to it.

But seriously, doesn't anyone understand that it is utterfabulously necessary that I have rockstar spouses and make rockstar babies?

Fame Vampires!.

[ *eyeroll* Disclaimer: I don't really want to bla bla bla, marry bla bla, bla, hope you understood that, because bla bla bla. Cool? ]

=====

I sent an sms about "great yiffing centaurs" to a few people. This actually led to a long, veeeery intelligent, 3-way sms war on whether if the Thundercats had sex with each other, it'd be yiffing.

[ If the ThunderCATS boink each other it's bloody fucking YIFFING and I AM RIGHT and YOU ARE NOT!! ]

And Saiya tribe (cause technically, they's gots the monkey tail) yiffings, and if The Smurfs can even have sex.

Isn't technology an amazing thing, that it allows yiff discussions at 3am.

[ Side note:

Yifftaro

1. (n.) A hamtaro being fucked in the ass while wearing a furry suit.

I heart Encyclopedia Dramatica ]

====

Ahhhh, fuckety, email swamp, email swamp! And I have no time. Gonna go out with some friends now, laters.

Written by lainie at 03:20 PM on January 23, 2006.

Spazzy entry because...More for me than you guys. Feel free to skip and ignore.

-----

Heard this song once.

King Kong - Animal.

Really.

It has lyrics like

"Hungry

Me want the berries.

Me want the berries.

Animal...Tiger's drive...Two long teeth....sabretooth tiger

tiger stomach empty -scary!"

Seriously. I swear I didn't come up with that.

And you know what?

They're on AMAZON!

Hah. Oh irony. They have song title like "To Love a Yak" and "The Crow".

Who's a Crow, who's a Yak, ei?

=====


Really makes me wonder what just one sentence can say. But anyhoo. Lyrics for my reference, don't mind this:

I’ve been a bad bad girl,
I’ve been careless with a delicate man.
And it’s a sad sad world,
When a girl can break a boy
Just because she can.

Don’t you tell me to deny it,
I’ve done wrong and I want to
Suffer for my sins.
I’ve come to you ’cause I need
Guidance to be true
And I just don’t know where I can begin.

What I need is a good defense
’cause I’m feelin’ like a criminal.
And I need to be redeemed
To the one I sinned against

Heaven help me for the way I am.
Save me from these evil deeds.
Before I get them done.
I know tomorrow brings the consequence
At hand.
But I keep livin’ this day like
The next will never come.

Oh, help me, but don’t tell me
To deny it.
I’ve got to cleanse myself.
Of all these lies till I’m good
Enough for him.
I’ve got a lot to lose and i’m
Bettin’ high
So I’m beggin’ you before it ends
Just tell me where to begin.

Let me know the way
Before there’s hell to pay.
Give me room to lay the law and let me go.

I’ve got to make a play
To make my lover stay
So, what would an angel say?
’cause the devil wants to know.

=====

Giraffe Giraffe looks like a real good laugh.

Corn maze photos
Corn mazes are so cool.

Written by lainie at 09:31 PM on January 23, 2006 in Stupid, but fun..

How to make a lesbian agree with you:


(click to see Amazon page on it)

And Lainie choking on her 9pm Coffee.

This applies to wayyyyyyy more lesbians than I care to count.

No.

Actually, this about applies to everyone I know who's been in non-hetero relationships. Especially girls.

Sometimes it feels like if you've been in a gay relationship in this country, you're about 2, maximum 3, degrees of separation away from every other gayness around.

You know how guys whinge about the girls doing that whole "Let's be friends after this" thing?

Yes, now imagine two girls breaking up. If it goes well, they's still gonna be on the phone with each other after that.

[ Excluded from explanation: subtle drama-manipulations ]

link ganked off Popagandhi.

By the way, she has this really cool blog post called "Why You Should Care", forgot to link it last time round.

=====

Irony is my mother remarking about my behaviour and putting on an "image" regardless of whatever my deviancy-prone mind is thinking........

.......Just as Joan Jett & The Blachearts' Bad Reputation is playing.

Written by lainie at 12:38 PM on January 24, 2006 in Daily Life.

Fip called me last night, while I was trying to solve some stuff over the constant noisy blast from mum's tv (it's possible I might dislike noise more than she does), and got a good dose of my grumpiness.

Fip: Uh...are you okay? You sound kinda grumpy.
Lainie: I am. Trying to solve something. But I can hardly hear you, much less hear myself think.

[ Shoots mother a hinting glare - am ignored ]

Fip: Okay......I will NOW SPEAK IN LOUDLY!
Lainie: .............

[ Effort to check temper: 70% ]

Lainie: Shouting at an annoyed person (especially me) is not the best decision you can make, really.
Fip: Oh. Uh. Okay. I'll call back later then.
Lainie: Yes.

Mmmm. I try to minimise talk when I'm grumpy, in case I end up saying anything mean. I don't really care if I hardly know the person, but friends are speshful so.....

=====

Ngeark. I was hoping I'd brought back my Gol & Gincu vcd.

Wanted to show the movie to Daph and Nessa. Cause I'm curious.....if they will pick up the crazy levels of slashiness in the movie. Because when people say "Damn, I didn't see it that way before", it just boggles my mind, I have no idea how they missed it. Like, sorry, were you looking at the screen when the movie was playing?

I didn't actually look for the vcd, but I think I didn't bring it back, because it doesn't feel like it's in the house....which only proves that logic is perhaps not my strongest point. Nyeh, understatement.

=====

Mom woke me up before 9am. I was so hideously grumpy I must have had an aura of bad leprechauns around me. Drank coffee - mother's sneaky way of bribing me to do my chores in the morning.

I kept my lippy comments to myself because she was buying ingredients for dinner, and I didn't want her to end up picking out heaps of stuff I hate, like broccoli. See, when you cook the dinners, you control the family.

[ And if you're one of those 'rebellious' teens, and your mom cooks, here's a hint: This woman holds hot metal, uses fire, handles many weapons, and determines what goes into your body, everyday. Common Sense would say: try to play nicer in case you die by Fried Fish and Malaysian Battle Spatula, or something. ]

[ Well, maybe those aren't the exact words Common Sense would use ]

I marvelled at her eyesight, which could still read the lil nutritional content labels. Mother says that she can read them all, as long as there're bright lights. Well, no wonder the supermarkets have such bloody eye-hurting flourescent lights then, for all the old bats out there who want to know what vitamins comes in their preserved foods.

[ What was I saying about being nice? Hmm ]

Came home, unloaded groceries. Drank more coffee. Napped. Flipped through papers. Working on a poster for Fip (and very frankly, I think it looks ugly gahhhhh). Asked maid if we could have lunch early (answer: yes. Reality: not gonna happen. Why do I bother?).

I'm meeting up with Daph later - I think. Which means, I finally got round to looking for an adapter to charge my stun gun. She hates it when I use it on her (but I only do when it's on low setting anyway, and I think it's kinda enjoyable, and besides, it's funny to make her freak out).

See this is the benefit of my friends not reading my blog (except Rach). I can announce beforehand that I am about to zap them when they're not watching, and they'll never know till it's too late.

Reading email from Rach. Always makes me smile. Gender in Victorian art, mentions how it has some stuff I like. Well, better her crowd than mine, I don't like studying art much (graphic design, not the same...uh. never mind).

=====

I have new bangles! Shiny! Shiny! Shiny! Shiny!

Wearing them now, hopefully it doesn't turn out that I'm allergic.

I'm allergic to everything though.

Oh and I have a mild fever again.

But that's really nothing new, mmm.

Just have to make sure I don't zap Daph with the stun gun while she's driving.

Or I'll get dizzy, and way sick.

Not that it's generally advisable to zap someone while they're driving anyway *shrug*.

Written by lainie at 11:51 AM on January 25, 2006 in Daily Life.

Finally got my laptop back! Left it in Daph's house last night, so came over today to be reunited. Goddamn the connection is slow.

-----

Daphne's grandmother is in Ipoh, so yesterday we took her sightseeing at the caves, Gua Tempurung.

Daph's gran and her mom kept speaking in French, which is a language where every sentence just sounds like one looo(oo-Oo-o-oo-o)ooong polysyllabic word. Maybe that's why they say the French are so good at what they do - they don't come up for air.

Anyway, the caves aren't some hardcore spelunking or anything (I have resigned myself to the fact that there is no way I can say anything about exploring caves without causing a snigger or two for KA if she reads this). Basically, walk with a guide on all these ramps in the caves (it looks like some scene from LOTR sometimes). He'll shine a torchlight on random bits of rock and say stuff like "This looks like a cat's face", or "This is a rabbit".

I wonder if they were stoned when they came up with all that. At one point he shone on the tip of a stalagmite, and said "That's Osama Bin Laden". Which was funny. We asked what it was named before it became Osama, and the guide said "Bengali Singh". It does look like a face wearing a turban.

Craptastic photos time!


Walking into the entrance.


This looks like a whole wall of tortured faces. From the right angle. Which, won't be the one that I took this photo from.


"This looks like a cat's face"
(creepy)


"This is a rabbit"
(a bit of a stretch, if you ask me)


"That's Osama Bin Laden" - The Stalagmite Formerly Known As Bengali Singh
(I don't care if you can't see it)


The lights get kinda creepy here and there. But cool.


This is what most of it looks like when we're not stopping somewhere so the guide can convince us some pointy rock is really a woman's face.


And as we exit, the light returns.


I have lots of photos of Daph with her big smiles (usually from her good cheer on singing songs she made up on world-peace-love / beef noodles or something annoyingly happy like that). I only like the one photo where she was sulking because she didn't want to take photos. Hah. Pete's always a good sport for pics though.


In return, Daph takes a photo of me. I make sure I smile.She doesn't take a photo of it . So we both have unsmiling photos here.


After we came out of the stream, some of them paddled in the water a lil. I didn't because I was wearing sneakers (and I don't like stepping in puddles, streams or anything wet especially if I have socks on).

Darryl: You wanna come in?
Lainie: Nah, it's cool.

[ I don't like explaining stuff because talking's an effort - Hey, I chose to keep a long tongue ring, over the ability to elocute properly so.... ]

Darryl: Are you afraid?
Lainie: Of FOUR INCHES OF WATER? Some credit this way, please?
Darryl: Yeah, whatever.

Smartass kids, I tell you.

Amanda got bitten by something (we assume a red ant) and was...quite unhappy about that. Coca Cola was used as bribery.


Then we left the caves, stopped at some roadside stall to let Daph's gran, and Pete, try some local fruits. Pete thinks not only does the Durian smell ghastly, it tastes it too.


After that, we picked Nessa up from school:

Nessa: What you guys did?
Lainie: Went to Gua Tempurung.
Nessa: You? YOU WENT?
Lainie: What?
Nessa: You went. Willingly. To caves.

Apparently, it is quite hard to believe that I'll do any walking asides from the variety in air conditioned buildings, willingly. What, I walk. I walk!

=====

I zapped Daph with the stun gun (just a lil 1 second zap, more like a buzz). She jumped up, accidentally kicked the table, yelled "Bitch" and turned around to give me this glare that set me off giggling for ages. Even after I put it away she was jumpy for a while.

I waited MONTHS to electrocute her. Oh it was worth the wait.

Holy crap, why was there a spike of about 1000 extra visitors on my site yesterday?

=====

Today I brought my mother to the doctor. I don't go to the doctor often, in Ipoh, but he still recognises me from my school days when I was always sick (not hypochondriac, dammit, I really did used to get ill a lot).

He visibly surpressed giggles at my gravity defying hair, and narrowed his eyes at the mug I was holding, undoubtedly filled with the very drink he repeatedly told me to stop drinking so much of, years and years ago. Coffee.

Ah.

While waiting for my mother's turn, I was at the magazine stall nearby scanning the headlines for the Chinese newspapers. I find it kinda ironic that I probably read more Chinese characters, than I speak Mandarin. Hell, I probably understand spoken Mandarin even less.

At least I think I can read a lil.

I don't know. I used common sense to deduce what those characters meant in my DragonBallz comics (kids can sometimes get very desperate when it comes to understanding comics, and the Malay translation didn't come out till much later)

....It helped cause I compared it to what they were saying in the anime....Which. Uh. Was entirely in Japanese, a language I certainly don't speak any of (although I can say a nonsensical sentence - spank my ass, spank my ass! Tatakuyo!).

Hmm. So I learned how to read some Chinese, through the Japanese language I don't speak.......................Hmmmmmmmm. You know, I might not actually be able to read any Chinese after all.

Hmmm.

Damn.

=====

*hassled look*

Bookmarks ALL vanished on me, had to restore them. How inconvenient.

Written by lainie at 12:00 AM on January 26, 2006 in Family, Daily Life, Friends.

I watched Memoirs of a Geisha with Daph. Daph's very proud that she's read the book before.

Mmm. This gives me weird visions of people reading books like Memoirs, and Da Vinci Code, and quoting random bits from it like it's The Encyclopedia of Facts.

I still think it's awfully weird that a movie about Japanese women has a Chinese (and Malaysian) cast.

I like Hatsumomo. She doesn't come off as crass as she does in some parts of the novel. But the movie overall, was a bit too Hollywoodish for me. Too contrived (and that's not a word I like to use often - it's 20% Rach's fault).

I also like the toking lady. Grah, grumpy old women rock. Actually, I only say that because the process of brainwashing all of you has begun. Because if I live that long, it's probably where I'm headed. So now's a good bit of foresight and spreading goodwill for grumpy old women.

In fact, Chinese custom dictates, it's good luck to keep one in your home, and ensure a life of luxury for them, especially if they like to complain, drink coffee, and talk to themselves. Very Good Luck. Confucius said so. So did some Emperors. The kinds that Did Well, and were not Overthrown and subsequently Beheaded.

Terry Pratchett agrees. Neil Gaiman too. Rumour has it Bill Gates was seen rolling in about two hundred midget old women (all slightly batty and grouchy) into his mansions - and had a Starbucks built in too, lil-people friendly.

But I'm Chinese, so I'm a better word of authority. I'm telling you. It's the Truth. Everyone loves old biddies. Because it's Good Luck, and Excellent Feng Shui.

But yeah. Memoirs Of a Geisha was average, for me. There were too many bits where I got bored. And no, I'm not saying it just to prove some point. And...uhm. Hmm.

======

Daph's family is moving into their new house soon, so today was spent at her place, doing some simplified version of those Chinese ritual things for it, tossed some yee sang around, made toasts...

Aunt Lea asked me to "bless the house" because I "like to talk so much". I goggled at her and asked "Among everyone here, you chose the atheist to bless the house?". We all ended up taking turns anyway. I said love (and forgiveness when it's needed) in the house.

As for me "talking so much"............*shrug*.

Made Daph nervous with my non-denial denials of stun gun usage. Who me? Are you suggesting I would do such a thing? That's silly. How could you say that? Well, I never, you have so lil faith in me (it doesn't help, I suppose, that while she was napping I was sitting next to her, giggling, and doing a few air-zaps while tickling her nose with some plastic thingie).

Daph told me some of the stuff she'd been studying in college - and it turns out the college I thought she was enrolled in.....Well, I was wrong. For a year. And I didn't even really remember what name it was.

She was shocked at my forgetfulness. Which just goes to show, if I can't even remember where my best friend studies, the least you could do is give me a bit of leeway when I can't remember anything about you. I mean, I can't even remember the things I do.

Anyhoo, she studied media ethics last semester and was telling me about her boo-boo during a presentation. "The bomb exploded, the children died, and that .....That is BAD.". In front of heaps of media students.
Aaah, I love Daph she cracks me up so much. Also told me some other stuff she learned. I wonder if they'll ever teach that in Cenfad?

My phone battery has flatlined on me yet again. Charger is being a bitch. Sigh.

=====

Speaking of old biddies.....Italics for Cantonese.

Mom: If my memory goes, you have to take care of me daughter
Lainie: Pah, cramp my style. Dump you in old folk's home.
Mom: Look at that! Bad daughter!
Lainie: I'm telling you, better pick a home now. Don't wanna take care of you.
Mom: You see, you see you see, what kind of daughter are you?
Lainie: I can't take care of you, it'll ruin my pointy hair.

[ Does StreetFighter-Guile handsweep movements along hair ]

Lainie: Gravity defying haiiiiiiir!
Mom: Haha...Stupid.
Lainie: Hmph. You're just jealous.

=====

My brain feels like floaty bits of uselessness sometimes.

I don't use it, I don't want to use it, I don't want to think about it, but it just feels so empty all the time. Like if a coin dropped, the echoes would continue playing for an embarrassingly long time.

Maybe I need to start drinking a lot of alcohol. Why yes, I do believe that is wise. Lainie's Wisdom Beerlosophy.

=====

An excerpt of something from my Inbox:

Greetings and Salutations,

As expected authorities have played the religious card. The Majlis Fatwa
(Religious Council) is in the process of gazetting a Fatwa (religious edict)
defining "Black Metal" to be Haram (forbidden). The entire report was rather vague, particularly in the definition of Black Metal as a religious
teaching, and contained gems like:

"The Black Metal movement was started in the US by a band called Metallica, who used the imagery of crosses to spread their evil message."

Lars: Please sue their collective asses.



Metallica? Black Metal?

*Sigh*

Evidently, someone beat me to the practicing Wisdom through Beerlosophy.

Written by lainie at 05:55 PM on January 26, 2006 in Family, Daily Life, Arty stuff.

After taking forever to fall asleep, my father finds it appropriate to wake me up - what time is it now, at 320am, to order me to bring my laptop to his room because he couldn't connect to the internet from his computer.

Extremely extremely extremely irritated. Had to turn off all my programs (I sleep with music on, cause I'm scared of the dark, so I leave on every other program as well, for convenience), save all my files. Log onto his account, open up bloody Firefox there. I brought the laptop to his room, snapped and told him it was unreasonable to wake me up at this hour for something like surfing the internet (and you think I don't know I'm going to end up setting the entire thing up? And if the computer can't, my laptop probably won't either because internet connection in Malaysia is a fucker anyway). He glared at me. So I told him glaring at me wouldn't change the time, it's STILL a ridiculous hour.

[ I can think of many reasons to wake someone up. There may be a robber in the house. Earthquake. Tsunami. Someone close to me died. The HOUSE is on FIRE. INTERNET does NOT bloody cut it. ]

Then he yelled that I was a bitch and to get out of the room. So, fine, whatever makes you feel like such a big man. If not liking being awakened at that hour for something inane, makes me one in your world, then fine. I gathered up everything and went back to my room to sleep.

You know what..Sigh, never mind.

Seriously, what the hell ELSE did he expect, a bouquet of roses?

=====

It's been bugging me for days now. I read in NST a few days back, about some New Yorker group called "Improv Everywhere", I think. Basically a group of them went on the sub in their boxer shorts (I thought that was quite funny). The photo there....Heaps of people in the train, wearing shoes, in a colour photo, but there were only black and/or white shoes.

I was thinking "That's strange......Aren't ANY of these poeple wearing shoes with a splash of colour?". Then I realised the shoes I wore earlier were white, with lil bits of black too. :/. And when I remembered that yesterday, I was wearing a white pair, Nessa white school shoes, Daph, mom and gran all wore black flip-flops or the like........

That's just so weird. I mean.

Lately I've been spacing out so much (mind wandering is rather addictive) that even Nessa's remarked on it.

=====
Because I'm out to kill your bandwidth:

I've been obsessed with lines lately. So drawing a lot of abstractkish artsy stuffies.

Here's a lil something I made few days back. Something kickstarted it, never mind what.



I can't say I meticulously painted it. Quite cincai-fied, actually. So...uhm...Don't look too closely.

But hmmm...I was in that painting a few days ago, when I made it, so it's weird for me to look back on it now and go, "Hey, that part of the painting is ME!". Because I don't really identify anymore, I suppose.

Oh and I made these two yesterday:





I had a different background in mind for the first, but was too lazy to use anything except the default shapes in vector custom shape group. Tch.
It was supposed to be a quick series of 4, but Daph called midway:

Daph: Hey, where are you?
Lainie: At home.
Daph: Cool, I'm picking you up!
Lainie: Where you now?
Daph: Uhhhh....I'm near, be there soon.

And normally, if Daph says she's "near", she really means she's two corners away and pissing off your neighbours by driving 10kmph cause she forgot to call earlier. So I shut down the comp and that, was that.

=====

Slung my bag across left shoulder for once. Nearly killed my shoulder.

Noticed that bag was unusually bulky, even by my normal magpie-ratpack-overloading standards. Decided to inspect. Never mind random small stuff like wallet, cards, brochures, adverts, and paper. LOOK AT ALL THE BOOKS I STUFFED IN MY BAG!:



1. Sketchpad (almost finishing)
2. Book I want to lend out, but no one's interested.
3. Secondary book I'm reading (for ignoring crowds).
4. Thumbnails sketchpad (more for layouts and idea visuals).
5. Random anything-goes sketchpad.
6. Writing notepad.
7. Book I'm reading (I really like this one so...).
8. Book I'm reading (in case I want something familiar).
9. Book I'm reading (of very short stories)
10. Sketchpad 2 (also almost finishing, so technically, between #1 and #2, I have a quarter of a sketchpad).

Hmm..that will be *count count count*...ten books... 4 sketchpads + 1 notepad + and 5 novels = 10 books. Forsooth, a great arithmetician!

Yes. All that, in my sling bag. It looked like it was pregnant with triplets by the time I was done. No wonder my right shoulder is so much stronger than my left. I don't even want to know what the hell I was thinking when I packed the bag.

=====

I lovies Bruce Springsteen. Mom's "not napping", which is her way of napping and not admitting it.

Gonna meet up with Daph. Want to wear shorts, cause it's hot, but am worried she'd pester to go to the cinema, and I don't want to freeze my bejollies off. Must out-stubborn her!

Nessa told me she dreamt I had inverted nipples and showed them to her. I told her how I thought it'd be hilarious if I tattooed a third nipple somewhere (also, terribly unwise, of course, but funny).

Can someone tell me why there's this fricking watermark at the bottom right of all my windows explorer windows?

Written by lainie at 10:30 PM on January 27, 2006 in Daily Life, Friends, Arty stuff.

Last night:

Prits said sometimes she's suspicious of me, because I....daze out....a lot. And I talk to myself heaps. *Shrug*.

I guess it doesn't matter except when I start laughing when she's talking to me, because I'm semi-aware she's talking, but I can't snap out of the self-conversation-haze I'm in (really, I cannot, I've tried before, it takes a fuckload of concentration), and then I grin when I realise that I'll have to tell her I didn't hear a damn thing, and the grin leads to giggles which snaps me out of it.

Then I get this "look" thrown my way.

Prits dropped me off home after midnight, and in ten minutes Daph came and picked me up. My mom was kinda appalled. I can't remember the last time Daph and I hung out alone. It's nice. We talked and talked and talked, and ah, she's an ol soulmate and a half.

=====

Lainie: What doing, what doing?
Daph: Picking up bro and sis. Can I come get you now?
Lainie: Need to shower, am on verge of growing fungi.
Daph: No! Two minutes! I'm there in two minutes!

Lainie: Dammit babes! LEARN. TO. CALL. EARLIER!!!

Let's just say I showered very very quickly, and Daph took slightly longer than two minutes.

At Daph's house, we watched Animal Planet. It had some documentary about monkeys in a city of Brahmin blue-buildings. Of course, when you watch documentaries about animals, it is very hard to keep from imitating them. Of course.



Me (so-so). Nessa (better - yes that is a bra on her head). Daph (oh, my god, holy Hanuman).

Daphne won the contest, hands down. *muttershowoffmutter*. I had another better monkey expression, but wearing a cap in that photo, and Daph pointed out monkeys don't wear hats (of course, monkeys also don't usually wear shirts or underwear, but never mind).

Doesn't matter, it comes nowhere near Daph's....expression..

Then we gave Nessa a weirdly fucktastic hairdo, and took more spazzy photos.



This is almost the worst photo we have of that hairdo. So, obviously, it goes up on the blog instead of the others.

I made up a song / poem snippet, it goes

"Daph has two legs, yes she does
and she has, oh ten toes
Five on each foot."

Nessa said I'd picked up Daph's song disease.

Daph went to the window, decided the world is lovely, and started singing one of her made up songs.

"The day is beautiful
And perfect
And the coconut tree
is, uhhh, so big and round
yes it issss"

(I don't know what kinda coconut tree she was looking at, certainly not the same ones I saw)

Then she pinned Nessa to the ground, starting bouncing an exercise ball off Sa's face, before rolling-body slamming on it, and pulling faces on Sa, singing


Irritating elder sister at work.

"This is Nessa
she is my sister
Nessa is my sister
And this is how she smiles *squishes Sa's face*
And she has no style *squishes Sa's protesting face*
This is her smile
My sister
My sister
She's so stupid
but I love her
even if
she has no style"

Between Daph and I, we come up with the coolest poems and songs evar. Evaaaarrrr! We rock your asses!

Throughout it all Daph was annoying Nessa by pulling Sa's face into different expressions and bouncing on the ball, squishing her. I have a video towards the end, and Nessa grabs a big bolster and whacks at Daph, who's grinning annoyingly as she runs away. Dumbasses.


This is a Daphtrap.
(okaaaaaay, I just took a proper look at this photo. For MY peace of mind, please restrain from leaving pervy comments)


This is a Nessachoke.

The ironic thing being, it'll probably take them more effort to take a shit than it would for them to trounce my ass about twenty times over. Then, we went out for a drink.

Daph: I'm so thirsty, I could drink a horse!
Lainie: ...............
Daph: What?
Lainie: ..............Ew?

[ Pause ]

Daph: OH!!! No! I mixed them up!
Lainie: Uhuh.
Daph: Like, yknow, eat a horse.
Lainie: Uhuh.
Daph: Cause you're hungry? Like, eat a horse?
Lainie: .....It just sounds so wrong the way you say it.
Daph: Nooo, and you can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink? I mixed those two up. So there.
Lainie: Haiya, you ahhh.

[ Later on ]

Daph: So I made all these buttons...and they say "Citizens of the World".
Lainie: That's kinda cool...
Daph: Then Risha saw them

[ I actually can already tell where this is going ]

Daph: And she told me it says "Citizens of the Word"
Lainie: Haha! I knew it!

[ Daph is my favourite dyslexic girl ]

Daph: Yeah I know. All the buttons I made.
Lainie: Babes, you should get someone to proofread your stuff.
Daph: I do! Pete does it for me, he's wonderful!
Lainie: Then the buttons?
Daph: He didn't proofread those, they had like, what, four words on them? What's there to check?
Lainie: Well....
Daph: Shut up. I know.
Lainie:

Seriously, for all the poking fun of Daph I do, I wish more people were happy like her. I mean. She has more than her fair share of shite to deal with, but in the end, she's always so upbeat and positive, and I don't mean in the "putting up a front" way.

[ If course, wishing for more happy people is not the same as wishing for more Daphne poetry....... ]

I wonder, short of stuffing drugs down everyone's throats (hey, that actually sounds like a good idea!), how we're gonna make everyone happier? Hmm.

We got a fair bit of harassments and stares at the coffeeshop. And we were just talking about how we bring friends back to Malaysia, and show them around, and they all say the same goddamn thing: Malaysia is beautiful (asides from our scary toilets), it's lovely, BUT there are too many sleazy men who openly jeer and stare at women, harass them, very disrespectful and rude.

Sigh.

And the way some guys get rude to the two of them, sometimes I think of how Daph once got angry and kicked one of those old school Hondas, the fucking sturdy type, and left a huge dent in it (shocked the hell outta the guy who owned it, too). And Nessa's stronger than Daph. Black belts, so they know how to aim their kicks.....

And if these two ever get aggravated enough, and decide to kick one of the guys in the balls..........

I suppose it's no big loss. *shrug*.

=====

This is something I'm kinda making...It's sketchy and has a lot of noise, so I can't put a big version up It's called "Monkeys on the Blue Roof". Because....it's a painting of monkeys on a blue roof.

I'm so creative with titles, I know.



Obnoxious colours, rah rah! And no, I don't care if you can't see what I drew.

It still needs a lot of work, but I can't continue it because....Uhm. I can't tell the difference between sections after a while, the bright colours give me a headache, I don't know / can't see what I'm doing.

By the time I'm done with it, it might all be flat colours, with one gradient. I kinda like making something so overwhelmingly bright though. This is a more....subdued version. The other one I made, after looking at it a while, made me nauseous and break out in sweat. Pwned by my own work.

Gaaaaah, no time no time, going out again! Later!

=====

Update:

Bah, I was going by alphabetical order to wish people on my blogroll a Happy Chinese New Year.

I only got as far as Bobjot's site, cause he has some funky math thingies going on, just to figure out the password and username for commenting, and I can't figure it out.

I was staring at it for so long too.

Shut up. It's that monkey painting's fault, I can't think anymore.

Hey, at least I can still blog (blogging requires no brains, rarrrr)

Written by lainie at 04:46 PM on January 30, 2006 in Family, Daily Life.

[ From 28th January ]

I'm in KL now. Instead of mom's siblings all driving down to visit us for Chinese New Year, we took a trip here.

The traffic jams on the other side of the highway was frickin scary. There's no way in hell Ipoh's gonna pack all those cars in. Watched the standstill on the other side, lots of open windows, hands and ciggies sticking out.

There's no way a smoker's pack will last them all the way back, unless they's ration a lot.

I messaged the few friends I knew were considering a drive down to Ipoh to be with family to warn them. Well, I thought I did, but NO ONE got my messages (well, at least I tried? And thank goodness I didn't say anything fantastically stupid in the messages).

[ Janice called me the next day, I called her spazzo, she called me spastic, and I will be seeing her in KL soon ]

I also sent Daph's number to Kat, Tei and KA, cause they wanted to meet up with Daph enroute to Taiping, but.........well, someone out there has Daph's number now.

[ See, this is what happens when I have to wake up for a 730am cab. ]

Then, I sent out Chinese New Year smses. I got as far as half my family, before a polite sms came through, reminding me that it is not "Gongxiraya", as I'd been happily wishing away (that saying is so stuck in my head), but "Gongxifacai". And apparently Gongxiraya wasn't even any time recent. Sigh.

Series of smses sent to a cousin, who must think I'm mad by now:

"Happy Gongxiraya!

I mean, happy gongxiraya, not gongxiraya!

I mean, happy gongxiraya, not gongxifacai!

Dammit! I meant, happy gongxifacai!

..sorry..Happy chinese new year"

Then I thought, fuck the gongxi crap, I'll do it in English. Sent out a few Happy Birthday messages. Don't know how that happened either, I'd almost swear I typed out chinese new year, but my phone changed it to spite me.

When I realised what happened, I decided, no one really needs to be wished, really.

I am totally not mojoing with my phone today.

=====

Sent out CNY messages. Proofread it like, twelve times.

Just showered.

Lainie: I used your towel.
Mom: Is it still safe for me to use, now that you've contaminated it?
Lainie: No. You're totally gonna get herpes from me now.
Mom: Chei!

Am so wigged out about tomorrow. Gonna visit LOTS of relatives, and I have no idea what their titles are. Friends telling me to "just wing it, it's all cool". Fuck you. There is NO WAY IN HELL you can wing at being Chinese. If you think that's possible, you're delusional.

Those old folks, while you're smiling, and trying to look vaguely like you're aware all your ancestors are from China, and nodding your head, saying "Happy Chinese New Year..................uh...." frantically trying to remember what your grandmother's stepcousin is called, before pathetically settling for "....aunty...."They KNOW. They fucking KNOW you don't know.

Then there's eating with chopsticks, because god knows it's a wonderful idea to eat with two fiddly sticks. I don't care how cultured it's supposed to look, I have fumbly fingers, bloody give me a spade and a spear.

I'm on dial-up tonight, kiddies, so I figure I'll blog blog tomorrow.

=====

[ Jan 29th ]

My mother is passing around this sms she loves

"May your lokams get bigger and firmer, your abolone tighter and juicier, and your lap cheong as long and hard as you'd like".

I nearly gagged when the blind bat asked me to read it out loud, in the car, surrounded by relatives. Yeesh.

Then she told all the relatives I said I was sending her to the old folk's home the moment she turns batty on me or gets Alzheimer's............And here I was trying to munch off the free food too.

I've never spent CNY in KL with mom's family before, it's nice. Very different from dad's family. We meet in a normal lil terrace house, there's yummy home cooked food (recipes all adjusted to be halal, for the Muslims), everyone sits and talks - well the women do, the men usually just check their phones and look bored. Oh, and no alcohol. THAT, is something very different, I'm used to CNY being accompanied by a lot of drinking and noise (lion dance, firecrackers, cries for yam seng throughout the day, men trying to be manly, women gossing together, kids screaming, parents screaming at kids, strangers everywhere).

=====

Made something simple. It's....kinda, a combo, of snippets of three songs I was listening to, at different volumes (narrowing the playlist was indulgent, and took more time than the photoshopping itself)...but I added the songs with the face, that...I mean, it's almost....Oh never mind.



It's a face.

I needed to make something calmer after the monkey one (I deleted the pic for that because it hurts my eyes and head to look at it, it looks like I made it while I was on drugs). By the way, I redid some of the colours on monkeys.



Still not done but hey CNY is not kind on computer time.

And I find it very interesting that when I make angry pissy stuff, most reactions are "Woah, why, what happened". Ei hello, I'm not grouchy enough of a regular day? But when I make trippy stuff, people offer me drugs :/. Well, at least I'm.....
communicating....somewhat...through these stuff.

Apparently, my message to the world is somewhat "I am angry, give me drugs".

Written by lainie at 05:20 PM on January 30, 2006 in Family, Daily Life.

CNY dinner at Uncle Francis' house. He and mom are cousins, and get along very well. I think he'd had a few too many hellos with beers by the time they had this conversation while I was sharing tong yuen dessert with my mom.



I had white wine. Uncle was in the midst of bullshittin my mom about something (check out his hand gesture in the photo, I assure you he was saying some nonsense). Mom's crapiola levels also flying high.

Mom: Mmmm, this tong yuen is good.
Uncle: Yeah, enjoy them, I made it myself.
Mom: *chokes up the tong yuen she swallowed*
Uncle: Hey, what's all this
Mom: Immediately ptui it back up when I heard you made it.
Uncle: I thought you said it's good.
Mom: It is, that's why I had to cough it back up again. I couldn't bear the idea of swallowing it down so soon.
Uncle: Yes, I put much effort into it. *Mimes wiping forehead and armpits* Made sure I put a lot of myself in it.
Mom: Yes, yes, I can taste it.
Uncle: Yes, add my sweat into the tong yuen.
Mom: Yes, I can see the sediments in the soup, from your body daki.

Oh, my god. These two are sick. Then my mom pushed the bowl to me so I could have my share......Everytime I put my spoon in the dessert I heard it sing "Armpit souppppp"

In the afternoon, mom told relatives I said I was throwing her into nursing home. Tonight, she told Uncle Fr that once when she said she'd probably end up moving in with me, my first reaction was to pipe up "WHAT? And ruin my sex life?".

See, don't get lippy with your mother, she knows how to get back at you.

My 13 year old cousin:



Cousin: Do you have a boyfriend?
Lainie: No.
Cousin: No?
Lainie: No, I don't have a boyfriend.
Cousin: Then, a girlfriend?
Lainie: Whaaaa.....?

Smartass kids, I tell you.

Smartass cousin's younger brother sister, starting on the good things in life early:



Ah, young padawan, you have much to learn. I can't wait till she gets married so we can show these photos.

We had an uncle there who practices all sorts of martial arts. Uncle Fr says he only practices his "Right Fist Kung Fu".....which is from the school of Beerkwando / Beerjutsu. Lift the mug with your fist! Lift it! Curl that bicep!

Some of my cousins were playing cards, when Carmen decided to start burning her fingers a lil on the candle's flame. I figured if she wanted harmless pain, she could use my stun gun - but she behaved like I was crazy for suggesting that.

:/

I still think the stun gun (not fully charged at that) would have been a safer alternative......I even zapped myself a lil to show it doesn't hurt if you know it's coming *but that was not a good idea, no, because I looked like some S&M freak*.

=====

[ 3oth Jan ]

It's my mom's birthday today .

Age not mentioned because as much as I call her a blind bat or old biddy, putting out actual numbers here is quite frankly, encouraging her to commit filicide.

We've been visiting more relatives today. Went to my grandaunt's house - first of all, CNY is great for gluttony because that's when the chefs, housewives, good cooks, all unroll their "secret recipes" and show off the fabulous food they can make.

Grandaunt inherited my great-grandma's antique furniture (well I don't reckon it was antique yet when my greatgran was using them). Saw the HUGE opium bed. Opium beds are cool. I don't care how much space it takes up, I's putting up one in my house next time.

=====

Then we tried to find another grandaunt's house in Damansara Jaya.

Everytime my uncle drives there, no one knows the way (bad sense of direction runs throughout the family). And every single time, he says the same thing:

"I hate this place".

I always get the feeling the best way to lose a relative is to drop him off in DJ. And the best way to subtly tell other people to fuck off and leave you alone, is to move there. Fucking Bermuda Triangle and a half, I tell you.

We drove through heaps of numbered places trying to find SS22 among all the sections. Then we drove through EVERY road there, staring at the houses, wondering which one was where we were meant to be.

I tell you, if someone woke me up at 6am, gave me lots of weed, then got me jittery and paranoid, then stuck a pencil in my hand, shouting DRAW A MAP! QUICK! THE COPS ARE COMING! MAP! MAP! MORE NUMBERS MORE NUMBERS! ROADS!.....And when my pencil flies across the paper in brainless-paranoia, I'd come up with some street plan thing similar to the retardation that is Damansara Jaya.

And I'd so fuck up some numbers here and there too, just to piss people off. And, add a letter behind some numbers, because, yknow, that'll totally make sense. My uncle was driving while we scouted out for the correct road, and out of nowhere the numbers will start growing A, B, C behind it.

Fuck. It makes NO goddamned sense, what kinda cracko-yoyo named the streets? I was trying to figure out if living in this area surrounded by all these numbers would make me smarter, or dumber.

My conclusion was I'd starve to death pushing my petrolless car around trying to find a gas station or restaurant or shop. I mean, I keep seeing them now, but the stupid thing about this place is you only end up circling ages around the buildings you don't want to see.

After a few phonecalls, we found the place. Turns out it's ridiculously close to Iki's house (just one street away, even). Met relatives I didn't know I had, ate more (roll me out the door already, woah).

I'm still getting used to CNY with my mom's family. So far, I'm liking it. Right, no time to blog more, gotta go again.