Written by lainie at 11:55 PM on November 3, 2008 in work?, Daily Life.

When a few of us can't Google up the "National Fatwa Council" office address, something's seriously weird here. I mean jeeeezez, it's easier to email Najib's office. Or even Hwa Tai biscuits.

So will you dear readers with the Google-fu kindly help out? We have some stuff we'd like to send them.

I've been asked (numerous times) why I'm so quiet on the whole issue of the National Fatwa council's fatwa against tomboys. You guys really expect me to bising on my blog everytime something pisses me off, huh?

The recent fatwas are easy enough to ridicule, so why haven't I? - basically, as with any issues regarding Islam, even if I think the entire thing is stupid and reeks of ignorance, I don't want to simply hentam without reading up on it first la. 

[ I don't want to disagree with it on their platform, since I doubt we'd have much reconciliation there. Still, it doesn't hurt to know what it is. A bit hard to screech "IGNORANCE!" and point my finger at them, if it's a mutual situation, yknow?* ]

I still haven't read up on it as much as I'd like, but realistically, I'll never have enough information to work with. 

I don't want to question the discrimination against "tomboys", because it's not like I want the council to more effectively discriminate against various sexuality and behaviour once they figure out there's more than tomboys out there.

I just want them to leave the whole issue alone, but that's not how it works, is it? Looks like a constant negotiation process, and in Malaysia, the people in the fatwa council seem more like dictators than representatives.

My take is anything that regulates sexuality outside the issue of consent is bollocks, and anyone who tries can piss off. But I'm not on the fatwa council, and I don't know any of the men making these decisions that affect so many Malaysians (far as I know, there are no females on the fatwa council).

Until then, there is a good read by Shanon Shah on The Nut Graph regarding this issue: Fatwa Dalam Pembangunan Masyarakat.

*this means I waste a lot of time figuring things out.

And - I have been up to stuff.

I just came back from a meeting at a very artsy house (defined by DIY arts-activists inhabitants and the amount of art hanging on the wall), and we'll be doing a lil street action thing on Friday, after prayers.

[ Street action = demo, protest, general activities associated with placard-waving, but usually of a more abstract nature. I think the street actions I've been in are like the interpretive dance of activism - so wanky, I'm not sure the participants understand it. I certainly hold a record of poorly comprehending what the hell we're doing in Katagender actions ]

The street action will (so far) include activists, concerned citizens, long-haired boys (short-haired ones welcome to apply, we just know so few of them), artists, vegetarians, and yes, lesbians. Some Katagender people will be involved. You can be, too.

If you think the recent fatwa against tomboys is so, so wrong, and would like to join us bunch of people in the street action (which we will complete mapping out soon), drop me an email at lainieyeoh@gmail.com and I'll hook you up . It's Friday, lunch break hour.

Oh. And. Let's be clear about one thing here. It's not a "Muslim" issue. It's a Malaysian issue.

Announcement: For the first time in years, I will have an office job. I start work tomorrow at (this name may sound familiar to you) The Nut Graph. My mother is very pleased at the idea of employment.

I will be doing graphic design, sub-editing, and writing (ie: Chinese people will say, I am one-leg-kicking). Despite the....er....liberal approach this blog takes on grammar and punctuation, it'll be alright.

Looks like after the years of freelancing as a graphic designer, illustrator, writer and whatnot, I've found an office job that encompasses all that. The most frequent comment I've received so far is that TNG is like "the new Kakiseni" - kinda odd, if you consider the content, but not that far off if you consider the contributors (my ex-housemate/ editor Zedeck being one of them).

Met him for dinner before we went for the street protest meeting. He told me he had actually been considering taking on the sub-editing job (I'm not sure why). 

I'm considered a full-time employee, but with only three working days per week (well, that's what it says on paper). I met the guy I'll be working with, he declared himself my overlord, and I told him I'm a happy minion when plied with caffeine. 

The other four days of the week? I'm not giving up freelancing, I like doing different stuff too much .

So far, so good.

I'll have to read through my contract agreement now, look up some Adobe licensing stuff, AND write a short personal bio / supply a mugshot..... -_-". I think I'd totally avoided writing one for Kakiseni for the longest time because despite blogging so much about...well, myself......I hate writing personal bios. Even my byline was a pain to write.

Don't think I'd really escape the TNG one though.

Speaking of doing different stuff, over the weekend I was pulled in as Front of House for Instant Cafe Kurang Manis (Friday), graphic designer / photographer / onelegkick crew / videographer for Talenthub's annual dinner and dance (Saturday), and backstage photographer at Kurang Manis (Sunday).

Somewhere in between, there were runs to the sushi bar in BSC, a family dimsum gathering, a very fun and drunken Heineken party at Zouk, a drinking session in WIP where a drunk Celcom representative offered me a Blackberry in exchange for switching telco providers, and a very entertaining cast party at Jo's house with awesome singing, incriminating videos, theatre talk, gin (I haven't had gin in a while), single malt whiskey and...my gods, the food was damn good too.

But I don't have time to talk about that (yet), because there's a certain national council out there coming up with bad advice, and apparently, the silence on my blog disturbs some of my readers. So, if you have the time on a Friday afternoon (Alliance of Artists Without Work, where art thou?), come join us.

Otherwise, signing the petition (of course there'll be a petition coming up) will help too. Now if you don't mind, I have to sort a computer crawl of 4G of photos, filled with poledancers from the dinner, and half naked famous boys backstage of Kurang Manis (they liked their skin-baring glamour fun).

Written by lainie at 11:17 PM on November 4, 2008 in Daily Life.

So, today was my first day of gainful employment. Here are some things that are different from my daily non-routine, spot the ones that you have too:

1) A security tag to beep myself in through the door.

2) My own login for Malaysiakini (I've been bumming off Gaya for the longest time).

3) Colleagues. The noise of other people's productivity (I presume) in the background.

4) A whiteboard with everyone's deadlines.

5) A pantry, colleague sharing biscuits - I am terrible at making Milo, by the way.

6) The cold. I like that there was minimal paper in this office, and recycling bins for plastic, glass and aluminium. It's so green if you don't count that I felt like an ice cube on an office chair. The air conds are very new, very powerful. I'm bringing in a jacket tomorrow.

7) Working from a computer that isn't mine (different keyboards, none of my usual applications).

8) Numerous emails with various login details.

9) Adding colleagues on chat applications. In this case, it has been slightly unfortunate for me because my usernames tend to be ill thought out.

10) No more swigging whiskey while I work, hunched up over a bowl of mum's pork curry (which she sent after I got the job), and endangering my eyesight by leaning in so close I could lick the screen.

11) Not waking up as I please (though I do only enter at noon).

12) Not eating at home (came home after dinner today at 11). I had a really good Nyonya lunch today, but I'm already "bored" of the food. I can't explain how I already anticipate this, the people in the office say the area has good food.

13) The work email address (which I am hesitant to have any presumptions about with regards to privacy etc, am I not a naturally suspicious person?).

14) Having a convenience store downstairs.

15) Cutting off a conversation on Gtalk to go to work (prompted quite a few "Awww, that's so cute, you have a job" comments).

16) Signing into an account at work, then having to login again when I come home. 

17) The pace. Maybe it's the air conditioning, but it's so much slower in an office. I've been warned it'll pick up a lot when I'm doing the work by myself tomorrow though.

So yeah, I have a job. Does this make me an office girl?

All I need to do is walk back to the office after lunch with my hair tied back in a ponytail, carrying a bag of fruits, and the transformation will be complete.

 While chatting with Nick, my colleague, at work:

Lainie: NIAMA!

[ pause ]

Lainie: Are gendered slurs allowed within a 2km radius of this office?

Nick: No.

Well, there goes my mini library of Cantonese curses.

Fever today :/. Came home to more work because people need. to. stop. giving. me. sudden. deadlines.

Written by lainie at 04:52 PM on November 7, 2008 in Events.

I'm back from the protest (tomboy fatwa) - we made it from Ampang Park LRT station over to KLCC.

Full update to follow. Currently burning up a fever so I need to rest because....I am heading to a lesbian party tonight -- yeah I'm really that fricking gay. Sexuality protest in the daytime, lesbian party at night. Come for it and --

[ EDIT ]

Party details deleted.
Turns out some events are secret. WHO KNEW?
Oh, answered my own question there, didn't I?

If you know me, email me for party details (or just to read the skanky invite details about eating sushi and chocolates off- girls consenting adult women).

[ /EDIT ]

Don't ask me why lesbo parties inevitably turn out skanky. Cosplay lah, pole dance lah, eating bite-sized food off each other lah. I guess if you're gonna be an out dyke, you may as well have ridiculous amounts of fun.

......It'd better be fun. Or I'm gonna thwack the self-proclaimed lesbian bringing me there.

Okay, sleepy time.

*sorry, too hard to resist.

Written by lainie at 12:16 AM on November 11, 2008.

My body is massively rebelling against me. My head is wonky, my ears have been stuffy for days (which is possibly the worst part), and several parts of my face are imitating enthusiastic faucets. The pills I got from the doctor last night don't seem to help.

So - I'm really not in the prettiest of moods right now. And this was my morning read:

PUTRAJAYA, 10 Nov 2008: Minister in the Prime Minister's Department Datuk Seri Dr Ahmad Zahid Hamidi today told non-Muslim non-governmental organisations (NGOs) not to challenge the National Fatwa Council's credibility. 

He said it was unfair to challenge or dispute a fatwa issued by the council purely on logic because it could create confusion among the people.

from The Nut Graph

Excuse me? .....No, really. What?

Do you have any idea how watafak something has to sound, before an ill-and--pissy girl can't even imagine how to react to it?

I get a bit frustrated. Some people say I am not allowed to make comments on Islam issues in Malaysia, because it doesn't directly concern me. Hello, have I signed any letters to the Fatwa council telling them to bugger off because none of them are tomboys?

Or women?

Have I?

Have I?

I did sign one that highlighted some issues regarding the fatwa, not because I want them to come up with one that more effectively hentams lesbian-tomboys / people lumped in these category, but because there were some issues that were (clearly) not considered.

Note how it does not say "All non-lesbians bugger off" at the end of the letter.

AND. Why won't the fatwas concern me anyway? I'm a human. This looks a lot like a human rights issue to me. And it's not like the non-Muslims live on the east, and Muslims live on the west. This thing gets legislated, I'll be living wtih it too. Why you think non-Muslims office people have that guilty, furtive look when it's bulan puasa lunchtime? You're not puasaing what. Terasa, kan?

I have Muslim friends who will be affected by this - to put it simply, they're quite upset. What should I say? I don't care what happens to your rights, I'm a godless heathen? And what if I date a Muslim again?

I can see where the reactions come from. On the surface, to question a fatwa, or the fatwa council, could look like I am disrespecting Islam. Why not? A fatwa is religious-based advice. I am not attacking Islam (never mind respect, I am nowhere near crazy enough to attack religion as long as my parents know where to find me) -- but I do disagree with the fatwa.

I am averse to the idea that the practice of religion (of any sort) should be dictated by an elite group, with no feedback from the community it affects. There are so many interpretations of Islam out there, but here in Malaysia, it seems like not ony do you have to be Sunni, you can't make too many choices about what your beliefs are in some aspects.

And it seems the fatwa council relies so much on assumed authority, you can't even discuss the issue with them. 

If it's true that fatwa is religious advice, and that you can keep seeking fatwas till you find one applicable to your situation, why do we allow an advisory body to legislate a single piece of advice over an entire community? And why be so adamant about shutting off dialogue? At least if they were more careful about the fuckloads of power they wield, I wouldn't be so wary.

I mean, tell me why one view is more valid than the next. Some Muslim scholars say homosexuals and homosexuality are created by God, as natural as everyone else. What if I'd rather get advice on sexuality-related issues from them? They certainly appear more knowledgeable on the issue of sexuality, at least.*

Or are views on Islam bound by manmade borders? After a certain km radius, it is no longer relevant? 

*chances are, I consider anyone who labels anything beyond heterosexuality as "unnatural" to be uninformed on the issue.

I am quite pleased about something. My mother delivered to me a dvd player, some books, Ipoh kaya puffs, meekoo bread (fluffy white inside, toxic-looking bright pink outside), and various boxes of frozen food. And a rice cooker. And rice.

My entire freezer is filled with steamed chicken, stews, streamed ribs, kam sah pork, curries, etc.

Oooh yeah. I quite teh happy. *rubs stomach*.

Some people feel that the protest draws attention to the existence of pengkids, which is a bad thing. I mean, are you worried about what will happen if the religious authorities realise tomboys exist? Oh, wait.

Maybe we shouldn't hold a protest, in case they call it an illegal assembly. Then people who care about tomboy issues will look like lawbreakers.

Or if we do protest, let's make it so nothing is so shocking that they will make it illegal to challenge fatwas. Oh, we already can't.

Maybe nothing so shocking they will make a fatwa against tomboys. Oh wait, I see a trend.

 Then I read (in quite a biased article, might I add) this quote by a tomboy:

 "Surely I will not be arrested if I dress like a man or when I am eating out with other girls?"

No, she is right. It would be absolutely ridiculous for the religious authorities to turn into the fashion police and haul up women based on their - oh wait. THAT'S WHAT THE FATWA SAYS YOU IDIOT. DO YOU SEE ANYTHING IN THERE THAT LOOKS LIKE "NOT APPLICABLE IN F&B ESTABLISHMENTS"????

*shakes fist*

I know la I am probably missing some points. I don't pretend to understand everything about Islam, or human rights, or where they intersect (although you'd think it should be a fair bit more than the impression I get everytime I'm told to butt out).

But I has Google, I has books, and I has some time to figure this out.

Meanwhile, I has drowsy meds. I leave you with a Youtube vid:

Goodnites.

Written by lainie at 02:06 PM on November 15, 2008.

Machines website - no stock of the new Macbook Pros.

Monthly promotions are the best reason to purchase from them (November, third generation iPod nanos or 4G extra RAM with purchase of MBP and Applecare).

Decent website, but calling-in is usually a pain.

EpiCentre website - Macbook Pros are available, but not the 2.53Ghz version.

Apparently, 2.53 is stuck in customs. Which means it could take fricking forever. The person I called made a guess that it should take about another 2 weeks.

Mediocre monthly promotions (prepare to go WOW at the.....laptop sleeve. And thumb drive. Or buy a MAC and get....a complimentary GSC movie voucher). I mean, seriously people, buck up. Pendrives are the default "marketing people are too lazy to think this year" gift in office parties.

Unhelpful website, but good customer service if you call.

[ Edit ]

I went for the fair they had at Pavilion over the weekend. Turns out the information I got over the phone is different from what I get at the shop.

I now have the Macbook Pro I want, and guess what - the promo was exactly the same as Machines. 4G iPod nano. Along with keyboard protector, laptop sleeve. 

The staff at EpiCentre speak a lot better than they do at Machines, but they screw up information sometimes too. Understandable, but it just goes to show they need a website that better states the kind of promotions they have. Too many misunderstandings.

Apple Malaysia website - Macbook Pros are available, along with everything else

The promotion is an exclusive gift - The FUGLY PURPUR TSHIRT giveaway, order now and get one! Only available in size Large!

Best website! WTF-est promo of the three! It's almost like they're saying "purchase your Apple products from a reseller".

Written by lainie at 02:30 PM on November 15, 2008 in work?, Daily Life, Events.

An announcement for those of us who go to Attic for what it has -  Luna the bartender, her mix of cocktails, the art, the parties (the many lesbian ones!), and of course, the live music performances.

You should go tonight. It's Attic's farewell pow-wow. If I recall correctly, they'd been running into licensing issues for their live performances, and who can imagine Attic without the music?

Attic has plans for a new location, but tonight's your last chance to have some of the familiar on Jalan Bangkung, including bitching on the balcony about how tiny it is.

The shameless amount of "accidental" eavesdropping, groping, and feet-crushing that has gone on there, whoever takes over the space will have to exorcise the balcony.

This is part of the invite in the mail:

Bringing back live performances!

Bringing forth a new cocktail simply named POW WOW!

Be partying on till the sun comes up! (We ain't kidding folks)

Be cam whoring the whole night!

 As for the music, Zalina Lee and Nish Tham will be performing tonight. I got a chance to eavesdrop on their set list, which promises to be really fun(ny).

I listened in while they were planning it over Moonshine's 3rd Anniversary (congratulations Reza!). So. As with all conversations that involve Zal -

I didn't hear anything

I don't remember anything.

 and it'd better stay that way if I know what's good for me.

Still, she'll be trying something............interesting. If you're coming to Attic, I'll see you tonight.

I'm digging my new job at Nut Graph. Particularly how it freaks friends out that I have a job that requires my presence in an office.

The day before I got some calls from concerned friends, telling me the Inspector General of Police released a statement that the recent tomboy-fatwa protests were a threat to national security (read: ISA). Yeah great, the IGP thinks a dozen of us kids are going to bring the country down. Just fabulous.

As long as I'm paying RM80 a month for a private security firm to guard the street I live on, I'm going to be very ticked off about all the politics our police force plays. Like we have no shortage of robbery, break-in and snatch thief cases for them to investigate?

I told my friends I didn't have the time to worry - because unless the police are knocking on my door, I have a more immediate pile of deadlines to worry about. I can't focus on so many things at a go, and yknow, that pile of deadlines gets higher if I don't work.

This is not the same as saying I would not be worried if I was detained. Even if I do bitch about I, I enjoy the press of the people (and people of the press?) around me.

I told my colleagues about the IGP's announcement, and Zedeck was like "Yeah, we know. We carried the news on the website".

I mean, I only work for a website that uploads the news, and I only bloody read plenty of the stuff before they get published. But yeah, totally missed that. My bad.

KUALA LUMPUR, 13 Nov 2008: Inspector General of Police (IGP) Tan Sri Musa Hassan today warned certain non-Muslim non-government organisations (NGOs) to stop challenging the National Fatwa Council's ruling that tomboyism was haram.

He said such action could affect national security and trigger retaliation among Muslims.

"I'm warning them and will take stern action as it involves national security," he said

From IGP warns NGOs against challenging fatwa.

Lainie: So if I can't come for work because I'm detained, can I call that an MC?

Cindy: No, you're not sick, you're just detained! (laughs)

Lainie: .......

Anyway, calling Katagender and Food Not Bombs non-Muslim NGOs doesn't seem accurate. We are also, for example, non-Christian, non-Buddhist, non-Taoist, non-Hindu, non-Sikh. People familiar with Food Not Bombs will be in a better position to notice why that statement (inaccurately) presumes a lot about the members.

As for Katagender? Even Katagender people don't know who's in Katagender.

Still, he is right about one thing. KG and FNB are non-Muslim NGOs. Otherwise our names would sound something like Sisters in Isl....oh wait. 

The laptop I am blogging on crashed twice (all I did was type.....). Which is why I need a new laptop.

I am switching from PC to Mac. 99.9% chance.

I will be heading over to the Mac Discovery week in Pavilion. There'll also be performances:

Sei Hon (Sat, 15 Nov 2008 @ 3.30pm)

Otam (Sat, 15 Nov 2008 @ 4.15pm)

Qings & Kueens (Sat, 15 Nov 2008 @ 5pm)

Paolo Delfino (Sun, 16 Nov 2008 @ 3.30pm)

Yuna (Sun, 16 Nov 2008 @ 4.15pm)

Couple (Sun, 16 Nov 2008 @ 5.00pm)

So, plenty of reasons to be there . I hope the new Macbook Pro is in KL. Last I checked, Machines was saying they were 1) waiting for SIRIM to approve the laptops, and 2) encountering shipping problems. As for Apple Premium Reseller EpiCentre, they were shipping them over from Singapore but didn't have the model I want (Macbook Pro, 2.53GHZ).

And otherwise, there's also the Comic Fiesta Anime Comic Fair happening in Times Square Sunway,Saturday and Sunday. I need to stop mixing up my subscriber lists. I hope it'll be awesome

Update: Status of Macbook Pros in Malaysia.

Written by lainie at 02:16 AM on November 20, 2008 in Daily Life, Stupid, but fun..

In the spirit of one-upping each other; Suan, your zoom may be better than my zoom, but my mouse is bigger than your mouse. So much bigger.

And by the way - Lainie has new MacBook Pro. Threats of robbery from housemates, fellow bloggers and (former) friends alike.

Written by lainie at 03:17 PM on November 24, 2008 in Friends, Holidays / Road Trip, Home.

Fooling around in front of the Mac

I'm back in Ipoh for a few days to see Nessa. She's back in Malaysia to sign some papers (she's selling the gym), and pack up her stuff - her family's off to Australia.

Yesterday, we had awesome meals, drove up (and down) a slippery mud slope in a jeep, middle of a thunderstorm, and went to our favourite secret spot. It feels like an adventure, crashing through where there's no path (this is the first time we didn't trek, due to the heavy rain). I feel kinda guilty about the plants - all weeds, lalang stuff, but still.

I think I've found the best place in Ipoh - and it's a mining pool. I'll post up pictures next time. Nessa, me - on a ledge, jumping off into the air, that gap in time before we hit the water. We didn't know how deep the water would be where we jumped, but it turned out perfect.

Two seconds before I launched myself into the air, I saw a branch growing out of my target area - I jumped a foot to the left of it, was fine . Before that, jumping into the mining pool involved scaling the wall - and Nessa's grabbed snake skin in a crevice on the way up before. Not that there seems to be anything in the water, though we keep expecting a naga ala Tasek Chini to emerge.

Since it was storming while we were diving, we didn't stay too long. Swimming in a huge pool with lightning all around you can be intimidating (and foolish ).

She'll only be here till Thursday. It's been good so far, hanging out. Happy times! This house doesn't look like it'll be empty in a few days. It'll never be the same again, hanging out in Ipoh. But life's like that, things change. I think it's for the better, and we've already planned our meetups for the next year.

Written by lainie at 12:17 AM on November 25, 2008 in Daily Life, Holidays / Road Trip, Stupid, but fun..

Some hounds are such dogs.

Just came back from dipping in the mining pool / dinner in Gopeng's jungles.

Written by lainie at 01:32 PM on November 28, 2008 in Events, Arty stuff.

I heard Bigeikoh is excellent.

Kakiseni listing: Bigeikoh

Only till Saturday.

Written by lainie at 01:06 AM on November 30, 2008 in Friends, Holidays / Road Trip.

I am taking a brief break from work, and here's one of those lazy photo updates.

Heavy rain on the 1st day we went to the mining pool.

Nessa posing like a peacock after our breakfast at an old Chinese kopitiam (just across the road from the kopitiam where Ipoh white coffee originated from).

Honey naan. Was goooood. Had tandoori chicken with it.

Best caramel custard, EVARRRR! At a kopitiam that also does great banana leaf lunch.

Crucio eats more than the other 5 cats around the house.

I believe animals have soulmates. Bising (cat in foreground of pic) had one, another cat. Then his soulmate was killed by a dog. He used to live up to his name, but I've never heard him meow again ever since.

At the mining pool, Nessa before diving in.

 Water feels great.

 Oh, how'd this end up here? I was at Boathouse with some friends, and Nish said the sketch looked like Lennon.

I miss my hippie pants too

The boys after dippin in the mining pool

:D

Nessa's guinea pig. Whiniest bugger ever. If it thinks you're having food, it'll be non-stop squeaking till you bribe it into silence.

Aunt Lea's wild rice salad. Twas awesome.